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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

To early to worry about DS being a cuddle-monster?

13 replies

u32ng · 12/03/2013 20:39

So my DS is nearly 6wks & already prefers being held over being out down & I'm worried we'll not be able to break this habit. However he is still young so I worry it will really stress him out if he is left to cry instead.

He will generally only fall asleep on me or DH - only been a few times I've put him down & he's settled himself. When he's tired during the day he seems incapable of going off to sleep on his own & cries. Then I have to pick him up & he'll eventually fall asleep on me. If I try & put him down in his bouncer or bed he just wakes up again after a short while & cries.

He just cannot 'be'. I think in a whole day he will maybe sit happily on his bouncer for about 10-15 mins & the rest of the day he cries on & off & the only time I get peace is if he's sleeping on me or by some miracle is sleeping in his bed/bouncer. The rest of the time I end up having to pick him up to comfort him. I love my son but it is getting quite irritating to be honest!

Anyone had the same issue & how did you mange to wean him off you? What age did you do this?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

tory79 · 12/03/2013 20:44

He will grow out of it. He's still a tiny liitle thing, hardly been in the world for 5 minutes. Why on earth would he want to be put down - its scary and unfamiliar, he just wants you, of course he does.

As he gets used to being outside of your tummy it will get easier. I think ds slept on me pretty much all the time until he was about 3 months. I didn't wean him off me, it was more a case of trying now and again and seeing when he was ready for it.

Have you tried a sling?

LynetteScavo · 12/03/2013 20:49

Hmmm....he is still very tiny...before you know it you will find him irritating because he is crawling everywhere and into everything, and is fascinated by putting his hands down the loo ect. Then he will ask you "why?" about everything. Get used to being irritated for the rest of your life...and appreciate the hugs now.

He wean himself off you about the same time he weans onto food. It's a natural progression of moving away from the milk source, to finding "real" food I think....

ShowOfHands · 12/03/2013 20:50

He's 6wo. He thinks he's part of you. He lived in you. Your heartbeat, voice and warmth are all he knows.

PirateHat · 12/03/2013 20:51

What tory79 said.

You are allowed to snort at anyone who tells you to cherish this time as they grow up so fast blah blah.

It is annoying and exhausting to have this kind of baby but it gets better when they can play a bit.

PirateHat · 12/03/2013 20:52

Oh what they said too, xposts.

morethanpotatoprints · 12/03/2013 20:56

Ah bless him. Its totally normal and shattering for you. It does get better when they are able to do a bit more independently.
Please snort at me because I can't resist telling you to cherish the time.

ilovepicnmix · 12/03/2013 20:57

Mine was like that and I used to try and settle him elsewhere thinking that's what I should do. Wish id just gone with the flow a bit more. He's 8 months now and napped in his cot for 1.5 hours and 1 hour on me today. Best of both worlds!

Jayne266 · 12/03/2013 21:10

I had the same issue I bought a swing which helped me and now only when DS is poorly (like today) he likes to nap in my arms. It feels wonderful I can help him when he's ill but also he likes to sleep in his cot bed. (although not for long enough another thread)

ZuleikaD · 13/03/2013 07:45

Far too early. He hasn't got 'habits' at this point because his brain can't form those kinds of memories. All he has are needs, and he's sensible enough to know what those are. He knows he needs to be held for optimum brain development and regulation of his physical systems.

You don't have to wean him off you - it will happen automatically and there's no 'best practice' way to do it earlier than he's ready for. It'll happen when it happens.

In the meantime a good sling is invaluable.

Snazzynewyear · 13/03/2013 07:59

Mine never liked the bouncy chair much but did enjoy lying on the floor under his baby gym, where he could still see me (sat on the sofa with a ) Maybe try spells of that? Also, mine mainly wanted to sleep on me, but is now a fantastic self settling sleeper so don't worry about it too much.

Original poster

u32ng · 13/03/2013 08:19

Thanks for all your tuppence-worths.

This motherhood thing is total minefield, and I always seem to be fretting about something !

Not ideal, but I discovered by accident this morning that DS seems to like to fall asleep with something on his face: currently had a corner of muslin half over his face as he snoozes in his bouncer!!

OP posts:

Muminneedofzzz · 13/03/2013 14:13

Both of mine were like that for the first 6 months, exhausting! They do grow out of it, enjoy all the cuddles while you can I practically have to pin my nearly 6yr old DS down to get a cuddle now days, luckily DD 2.8yrs loves cuddles still!

ItsallisnowaFeegle · 14/03/2013 13:08

My DS is 13 weeks old today and exactly the same as your DS, OP.

Enjoy it while it lasts, it won't last long.

I don't think you can ever give too many cuddles to a newbie, or a not so newbie, for that matter.

I'm slowly getting used to both myself and my home being a shambles.

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