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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Can 7 year old DS go to park alone?

69 replies

HerNibs1980 · 05/03/2013 15:08

Hi guys,

I have a question. My 7 year old DS is quite responsible for his age. Now we live right opposite a park that I can see from my windows, and we go there as much as we can, although with me doing a full time Uni course maybe not as often as i'd like. Now my 7 year old is begging to be able to go over on his own on days I cant take him. He has his own phone, and I can see the park from my windows and other children of his age play there unattended. Do you think it would be ok for me to let him occassionally go there on his own if he takes his phone with him so I can contact him regularly?

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GooseyLoosey · 05/03/2013 15:09

Wouldn't let mine do it.

LeMousquetaireAnonyme · 05/03/2013 15:14

I would let my just 8 years old DD go if I still leave in the UK could see the whole park from my window. Here I can't, park too far away, but I have been sitting on a bench since she was 4/5 now letting her do her thing, really out of sight now for about 2 years.
She knows the boundaries, not following anybody and always asking me if she is not sure. I do keep an eye on her (especially that now she is followed by DD2 who is only 3)

Iseeall · 05/03/2013 15:16

CaptainSweatPants · 05/03/2013 15:17

In my area only secondary Sch kids have phones

IHeartKingThistle · 05/03/2013 15:18

I wouldn't.

7 year olds have phones now?

LeMousquetaireAnonyme · 05/03/2013 15:18

she doesn't have a phone.

nannyof3 · 05/03/2013 15:18

No!!!

nannyof3 · 05/03/2013 15:19

Cant u do some work in the park?

IncognitoIsMyFavouriteWord · 05/03/2013 15:20

mine did at that age very much so and I lived opposite a park when I was a child and I was much younger than 7.

Now I know times are different but I'm only 33 so it wasn't that long ago.

It basically depends if you can trust your son to check before crossing the road and to never ever leave the park except to come home.

ditavonteesed · 05/03/2013 15:22

No way on this earth, I have just started letting mine play in the playground while I do a 5 min lap of the park with the dogs and dd1 is 9.5yo. Also out of interest why the phone? dd1 wants one but I said until I let her g places on her own she doesn not need one.

Original poster

HerNibs1980 · 05/03/2013 15:23

Not entirely sure why the topic of conversation is turning towards the fact my son has a phone at 7.....it happens to be so his father, who lives 400 miles away can contact him direct without having to go through me. Although not really sure what is so offensive about him having a phone. But to those who commented regarding my question, thank you for confirming what I was thinking, which is to tell my son No he cant go on his own. Was only asking as he's been going on so much I started to doubt my judgement and wanted to ask other peoples opinions.

OP posts:

ditavonteesed · 05/03/2013 15:32

Its not offensive in the slightest, I was interested :)

Original poster

HerNibs1980 · 05/03/2013 15:39

Oh no not yourself as you seemed to genuinely ask, :) whereas other comments on the thread seem to not answer the question I asked at all yet make it apparent they have no approval for the fact my 7 year old has a phone. Although its only a bog standard cheap as chips Nokia that doesnt even get internet and looks more like a toy then anything, it seems to have been met with alot of unnecessary disapproval. :(

OP posts:

Wallace · 05/03/2013 15:39

Of course he can go on his own. Unless it is a very busy road.

Original poster

HerNibs1980 · 05/03/2013 15:43

No its not a busy road at all, its on a quiet estate, where loads of young kids hang out on their own. And due to my course and the fact I have 2 younger ones and being a single parent I cant always take him when he wants to go. But the worry is always there that what if he gets snatched you know? Just didnt know if I was being too overprotective or if I was justified in my concerns as I was getting the whole "But they're over there on their own, why cant I" routine.

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nickelbabe · 05/03/2013 15:46

no, I wouldn't.

front garden, fine, but not park.

I have no problems with him having a phone, but would not trust him to be able to use it properly in case of emergency (what i mean is he might panic and not ring you etc)(certainly not that he's not trustworthy but that i don't think he'd be developmentally adept)

If you were outside too, then I would say okay.

KateShrub · 05/03/2013 15:50

This is common in civilized countries, but not in this one, sadly.

Original poster

HerNibs1980 · 05/03/2013 15:51

No I think the same. He can use the phone in a calm manner, but like you say if something happened and he paniced would he be able to still use it properly. Am going to have to tell him he has to wait a while yet and just have to put up with going couple times a week or when weather is nice. What age do you think a child should be allowed to the park on their own?? Just I want to make sure I'm not wrapping him in too much cotton wool and let him have some freedom and responsibility, but dont wat to endanger him in the process.

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Original poster

HerNibs1980 · 05/03/2013 15:53

Kateshrub, do you mean not this one as in not in the UK?? As I see your point, too many children go missing nowadays, its not like when I was a child and used to go out on my own really young.

OP posts:

Wallace · 05/03/2013 15:53

Honestly I see no reason why not. He is more likely to hit by a squirrel throwing nuts out of a nearby tree than be snatched, honest!

You could start by letting him go for 10 minutes (he could tell the time on his phone) and build up the time slowly - if he doesn't come back when he is supposed to then he doesn't get to go next time.

Original poster

HerNibs1980 · 05/03/2013 15:56

This is such a tough one, as i'd love to let him, I just have this constant fear of "What if..." You know?? I'd never forgive myself if something happened to him.

OP posts:

nickelbabe · 05/03/2013 15:56

you don't need to say "oh we'll look at it again in such and such time"

maybe just keep an eye on him when he plays - go with him but stay on the edge of the park, or tell him he can go ahead of you and you'll follow on in 5 minutes (increasing the time by 5 minutes every now and then)

make sure he is always careful of the road and if he shows signs of forgetting, go back to "no not at all"

thinking1 · 05/03/2013 15:57

I would let him go.

minicreamegg · 05/03/2013 15:57

You can see the park from the window so I would let him go.

Wallace · 05/03/2013 15:58

I took Kateshrub to mean that it is common for 7 year olds to go to the park themselves in civilised countries but unfortunately not the UK

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