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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Naughty Step

9 replies

Spoo · 30/04/2006 13:26

We have started putting 15mnth old DS on the naughty step when he really misbehaves. Only for a minute and we always give him warnings. What do you do after the end of the minute. Should I then cuddle him and tell him again what he did wrong - or should I leave him to scream it out and then tell him later? Very confused about this issue - so any help would be appreciated.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Twiglett · 30/04/2006 13:30

I used to go and say 'when you calm down you can come and do xxx' .. then go back every 10 seconds and say 'calm down and come and do xxx'

hth

jambuttie · 30/04/2006 13:58

We explain again why they are on the naughty step and they say sorry, then they get a cuddle and we are all frinds again

Original poster

Spoo · 30/04/2006 18:52

We have tried the apology bit at the end - bearing in mind his age but he just gets himself into a complete paddy - and is not willing to have a hug or anything. Just not sure what to do whether to leave him there until he calms down or to try and console him.

OP posts:

jambot · 30/04/2006 19:57

To be honest with you I think 15 months is too young. For the concept to work he needs to be able to communicate at a certain level and also understand exactly why he is being put on the naughty step. My dd is 14 months and there is no way that she would even grasp the concept. If she does something I don't want her to do, I tell her no very firmly and remove her from the situation and give her something else to play with or do as a better option. Sometimes she'll have a moan but normally as soon as she is distracted she's totally forgotten what she was doing a minute ago.
I fully support the 'naughty step' technique but think you should leave it for now and try it again when he is at least older than two.

tortoise · 30/04/2006 20:03

id agree with jambot. Leave it until your ds is older.My dd2 is 21 mths and i will probably start the naughty step when she is 2.Its quite effective on dd1 2.11.

sparklemagic · 30/04/2006 20:27

I agree with Jambot, he is too young for this strategy. There is a useful NSPCC leaflet on this subject that is worth looking at that explains that at this stage when children do 'naughty' things, they are really seeking attention and revelling intheir power to grab attention. They also revel in learning about independence from you so are guaranteed to experiment with it - eg, if you say don't do something, they probably will just to test themselves and you....but it isn't really naughtiness and as people have said, he will not really be able to process why he's on a naughty step or learn anything from it....

At this age generally distraction really will work, and life is much easier if your home is toddlerproofed so that he can't really touch anything he shouldn't....Also at this age, they need your interaction - my DS needed me down on the floor playing with him for much of the time, and didn't get into mischielf really so long as he was happily occupied by someone!

I never used a 'naughty' step but did use time out in his room as a last resort, but this was more when he was about two and a half...
hope some of this helps..

threebob · 30/04/2006 20:30

What does your 15 month old do to "really misbehave"?

Also warning won't work - they only cause the behaviour to be prolonged. The moving to the step is the cause and effect in itself.

7up · 30/04/2006 21:22

agree with others that its too young, my ds is 18months and i couldnt imagine him understanding or staying put on a step, way too young. Sparkles right, distraction is a wonderful thing at this age. 'no, leave that alone, come and play with this .....'blah blah blah

madhide · 30/04/2006 21:35

My DD is 22 months and we have been putting her on the mat for the last 2 months or so she stays there everytime and is really a way of giving her time out when she becomes frustrated.

She definitely understands the concept and as we do baby signing we make her sign sorry before she comes away.

I think it can work at a young age but it really depends on the individual child

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