Should I be worried about this?

[Tishtash2teeth]

Me and DH are in the process of adopting the most delightful little boy. He has been home for three months now and things are going really well. He is a lovely little boy.

I have a few niggling concerns and wondered of this was "normal" toddler behaviour or something more concerning. For the last month or so he has started putting his hands over his ears when there is a loud noise or when he is excited. So etimes he may do it when there are lots of people about. I googled (which is always a great way to worry yourself sick) and found that this may be a sign of autism. He does t appear to have any of the other emotional, social and leaniing issues that are also linked to autism. He is very bright and is obsessed with trains and letters. He also has a strong memory and repearts phrases from adverts quite a lot.

Do you think I'm a but neurotic to worry?

You don't say how old he is?

He is 3 and a half

It may or may not be an autism/aspergers thing but I'm not sure there's much point in worrying about it either way! At the toddler stage I think the strategies would be the same anyway - just a bit of reassurance/soothing if he seems upset. It may be worth getting his hearing checked to make sure it's not a physical over-sensitivity issue. It might also be helpful to educate yourself on other potential autism/aspergers signs incase you notice anything else but it may just be a phase so try not to get too concerned.

We have wondered about our DS's behaviour recently too - he happily wanders off & doesn't come back/would equally happily go with someone else! He's only 16mo & is our pfb so we have no idea if it's 'normal' behaviour or not! We've adopted the attitude that it's just his personality & we'll keep an eye out for anything else that could build a picture but we're not going to stress about one thing. Not stressing is difficult when you have a niece with Aspergers that was identified while you were training to notice such things in children & then felt guilty you hadn't noticed it first!

At the end of the day, our children will be who they are, regardless of what labels we may assign to them. Labelling them won't change them, it'll just help us know how to support them better! My niece hasn't stopped being her since she was diagnosed & for the most part we haven't changed how we are around her because as a family we'd already figured out what helped her, without needing it to have a name!

First of all, congratulations on adopting. I think you are right to be concerned. However, maybe just keep observing him for a while. Do you have a health visitor? They are usually very on the ball for these things. A previous foster child of ours had similar behaviours and was diagnosed on the autistic spectrum. You will know yourself when (or if) it is time to get a professional opinion. Not neurotic, just getting to know your ds. Good luck

I am going to have a word with the health visitor about this next week - and I think in the meantime I'll make a note of each time he does it and why. Hopefully it's just a little habit he'll grow out of x

Hello Tishtash, congratulations on your adopting your little boy, he sounds lovely!
I'm not for one minute saying that your DS has any difficulties, but you sound very attuned, and if you have worries, then it might be worth asking your GP for a referral to a developmental PD, just to check things out.

I have to say that I have very little knowledge though, and the SN board is great, so might be worth posting there, as you will get great advice.

... and repearts phrases from adverts quite a lot.

this sounds like echolalia. does he have any other speech and language issues?

I don't think it's echolalia as he doesn't repeat immediately. It is more like if we go past a sign for sky tv, he'll say "look mummy, sky, believe in better". He doesn't have any language or speech delay at all.

On a very crude and superficial level, they do sound like Aspie-type behaviours. What about eye contact? Is he physically affectionate? How does he play?

I would get some assessments done, just because it's better to know than not. But ASD doesn't have to be a "bad" thing anyway.

He does make eye contact and is affectionate. He initiates cuddles and looks to be comforted if upset. He plays well with others, both children and adults (not to keen on sharing toys). He can play alone and tends to play with his trains mainly - he likes to push them around the track. He also likes to play imaginatively with his toy kitchen. He also loves rough and tumble play. He plays letter games on the iPad and sometimes puzzles, but he's not too keen on drawing.

He is above average in intelligence I think, but behind in things like self-care and fine motor skills, but I feel this is more due to his poor start in life (chronic neglect) and he is still learning some of these skills.