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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Sibling rivalry - DD2 always comparing everything (even cereal)

14 replies

shebird · 03/02/2013 08:28

Help! DD2 is driving me crazy. She constantly compares and measures everything with her older sister. It's come down to cereal now 'she's got more than me' and toast 'hers has more butter' and juice lining them up to see if they are the same. I like to think I treat them both equally and fairly and hoping this is a phase. Any suggestions or should I just get the scales out and measure everything as proof that she is not being hard done by? Meanwhile I'm just going to put my head in the oven

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IrnBruTheNoo · 03/02/2013 08:32

My two boys are 5yo & 2yo and we have similar issues. It's becoming a daily thing now! I play referee a lot of the time when they're playing too.

Wish I had an answer for you, but I can only empathise!

Blessyou · 03/02/2013 08:36

Normal! I have 100 brothers and sisters (well, lots anyway), mum used to have a great trick of letting one kid cut the cake and they got the last choice over which slice they got. I tell you, there would be absolutely no difference, all slices would be perfectly equal sizes

Harrysmummysarah1 · 03/02/2013 10:05

Normal
I did this with my sister when I was younger haha

Original poster

shebird · 03/02/2013 12:21

It just drives me nuts! DD1 is fine doesn't even notice if she has more or less its just DD2 with everything. Perhaps something to do with being the younger sibling? Meanwhile there's to keep me sane.

OP posts:

colditz · 03/02/2013 12:23

You make them do it themselves. You get one to cut or measure, and the other to choose. All portions will be identical.

HellesBelles396 · 03/02/2013 12:30

agree with colditz and bless you but by no means give creedance to this paranoia by weighing etc - you'll be stuck doing it forever and ds will be stuck seeking reassurance forever.

they could defo be pouring own cereal and juice and be buttering own juice.

Harrysmummysarah1 · 03/02/2013 13:08

Also when me and sis were younger and we got a treat like a slice of cake or something both slices had to weigh near on the same mum used to have to put them on scales lol!
Also a bag of sweets would have to be shared equally with us getting the same amount of each different type off sweet in the bag!
I have no advice just to say we grew out of it .
Also I'm the older one and was the one whom was the worst lol.

Original poster

shebird · 03/02/2013 16:44

No I really don't want to pander to this just need a magic cure. Funny she's not bothered about measuring if DD1 has more broccoli or carrots!

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Original poster

shebird · 03/02/2013 16:48

Oh and they do pour own juice and cereal but this had led to endless tit for tat and eventual DD2 in meltdown about who's got more - I mean it's only porridge not that exciting. You would think they were starving and deprived.

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Mother2many · 03/02/2013 16:53

My children do it too, and they are 9 and 7... I've had to prove, the juice in this glass is the same amount as THAT glass....just because the cups are different size/shape....

I love the cake idea! Works with scooping a bowl of ice cream too. If they scoop their own bowl no prob. but mine are older..

Good luck! This faze shall pass.... :)

TheInnerSea · 03/02/2013 16:55

How old is she? I have vivid memories of my two boys, aged about 2 & 4 fighting over two identical bottles of water!

They have grown out of it a bit, although special things will still be carefully checked, they are now able to agree it between them and there's no need for me to be involved

MarshaBrady · 03/02/2013 16:55

We did you cut I choose when we were little. Worked a treat. Precision cake-cutting at it's best.

HellesBelles396 · 03/02/2013 17:02

there is no magic cure, I think. fb & I were competitive only around our mum - fine with each other the rest of the time. she babied me but was more respectful of him so we were both resentful!

we are usually friendly now though he does like to try and boss me about! btw, he's younger but there's only a year on it.

DeWe · 03/02/2013 18:43

My girls were like this on some thingsbut have mostly (except when it is a very special treat) totally grown out of it. Ds (dc#3) has never really got into that.

For a time it was things like who had the top plate (or the one nearest the cupboard, or the one that was washed up last or whatever took their fancy). Problem was dd1 would make a big fuss about it, (age about 5yo) and dd2 (3 years younger) would then make a big fuss about also having it, simply because she thought it must be important because big sister was fussing about it.

I had a quiet word with dd1 when she was about 6-7yo and pointed out that if she quietly came and asked me for something like that, and didn't make a fuss if dd2 had to have it for a good reason, then dd2 wouldn't be bothered about having it, so she'd get her way more often. That seemed to work mostly.

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