Help, I am going to lose it with my almost 2yo

[MeerkatMerkin]

He is 21mo, he never stops whinging/crying. He always has to be ON me, he is always trying to breastfeed, I can't go on being a 24 hour milk bar. He won't even walk anywhere anymore, he wants to be carried. I can't even nip to the loo, if I take him with me he climbs me, if I leave him he wails. I can't do anything around the house. He has to be the focus of everything or he gets angry and clingy and cries.

I have no idea how to handle this.

Oh, and he barely eats! Just isn't interested in food.

Sounds like you need a break
Could you afford nursery a couple of mornings a week?

Nope, flat broke. I am trying to get a part time job so that it can pay for nursery sessions but not a lot works around DH's job/childcare hours.

Agreed it would be worthwhile to get some childcare if you can find a part-time job. I was going batty at home with DD. Now working 1 day a week and it makes me appreciate her so much more on the other days. It is so difficult to coordinate though if you're looking for work and childcare. In the meantime playgroups? They sometimes get less clingy around other children.

I dont know how to say this nice so will just say it.

He knows you cant let him cry so he does it to get results.

Have you tried having set times you bf him and then if he asks just say no and put up with the crying? Its easyer.if you take him out to playgroups or swimming or a walk in pushchair.

If he wants carrying say no but we will have a rest if you want one and the stop walking for a few minutes.

You need to set bounaries and rules be consistant and the crying will get less as he gets use to the rules.

Also crying and clingness could be thru illness so its good to rule out ear infections or teething. Is he sleeping well and having nap in the afternoon?

Thanks for the advice. We go to playgroups and he is ok there - it is definitely worse when we're at home or one-on-one.

I have recently started only allowing him to feed before his afternoon nap and before bed (he's still feeding in the night but that's a whole other thread!), it's just difficult because the sound of him crying makes me sad and frustrated and there doesn't seem to be anything that makes it better for him.

He has got a cough at the moment but this has been going on for ages, feels like forever. In the past when I have tried to enforce rules he's ended up ill again and we've gone back to square one which is why I am trying to ignore the fact that he is ill. That sounds heartless - if it was a stomach bug and all he could keep down was breastmilk then of course I would and have fed him as much as he wants, but he is fine in himself aside from the cough so I'm trying to "get tough".