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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

should i allow dd to be left-handed or try coax her into being right-handed

92 replies

hazlinh · 07/03/2006 08:04

i've always had a hunch that dd, now 2, is left-handed. she has shown left hand tendencies since she was born. and is now quite strongly left-handed but the nanny and my mother, who mainly take care of her, didn't seem to think anything about it and have been trying to make her use her right hand for eating and stuff. I think they just think she's too young to realise the difference between her right and left hand, iykwim.
anyway i'm getting quite concerned about this, because i am beginning to think that i should just tell the nanny to get off her case and let her develop the use of her left hand naturally. but how does one know if she really is left-handed?? and i am worried about any future problems, because i have absolutely no experience of lefthandedness and no one in the family is lefthanded so we wouldnt know how to start dealing with it..and where i am, (in asia) i dont think it's easy to find leftie scissors and things...
basically, does anyone have any advice for me? anyone been through this before??help..

OP posts:

zippitippitoes · 07/03/2006 08:07

let her develop naturally lots of info and products here \link{http://www.anythingleft-handed.co.uk/home.html\ Anything Left Handed}

jalopy · 07/03/2006 08:07

I think the general response you will get is to let her decide for herself. It's detrimental to interfere with handedness, I believe.

Dior · 07/03/2006 08:09

I'm left-handed, and have never had any problems of any kind. I use normal scissors etc. Why would anyone try to change someone in this day and age?

noddyholder · 07/03/2006 08:09

Why would you want to change it?My ds is left handed I think it is something you are born with and doesn't need addressing in any way

Filyjonk · 07/03/2006 08:09

leave her to develop. She is left handed, her btain is probably hard wired that way, all you can do is persuade her to mask it.

many lh in my family, its only a problem cos they're so much better at maths!

SoupDragon · 07/03/2006 08:09

Let her decide!

jalopy · 07/03/2006 08:12

Forgot to add, my daughter showed very strong lefthandedness from day 1. Fed herself, drew, kicked a ball, pointed, received, etc all with her left side. Out of the blue, at age 4.5 she swopped to writing with her right hand, despite her lefty dominance. She is now 6 and continues to write with her right hand. They will leave you guessing for a while.

jac34 · 07/03/2006 08:14

I have not got a left handed child,but believed that there were more problems,if you force her to be right handed.Tell the nanny to just let her hold things in whichever hand she chooses.
My son has a really "odd" grip,with pencils,pens,cutlery,etc. In reception and year 1 his teaches tried to get him to hold things differently,with special grips etc., but it didn't work.His year 2 teacher now leaves him alone to hold things as he likes and his joined up writting is much neater,than my other son in the same class, who has a conventional grip.
He does battle a bit with cutlery though, especially if knives aren't very sharp.

Gemmitygem · 07/03/2006 08:21

I would say let her develop naturally and certainly don't force her to use the right.

My mum was lefthanded and brought up in the 50s when they believed it had to be 'corrected'. It really messed with her hand-eye coordination, leaving her with strength in the left and coordination in the right. It has genuinely affected her, she says she thinks it has made her more clumsy and also unconnected in the way she associates ideas.. Don't know if it's true but it's food for thought...

FairyMum · 07/03/2006 08:30

I am left-handed. It's true in the old days they thought it was some ind of brain damage which had to be corrected. It's just the way you are born and there are no problems with it whatsoever.

expatinscotland · 07/03/2006 08:34

i write and eat left-handed. i do everything else right-handed. glad i was left to develop on my own. i'd be concerned that my paid caregiver was trying to force her ideas of development on my child.

Gemmitygem · 07/03/2006 08:44

sorry for being thick: I didn't mean it was being left handed that caused my Mum problems, it was the fact she was forced to write with/use the right hand which caused the problems...

Sorry!

Miaou · 07/03/2006 08:45

I was a university with a guy who was naturally left-handed but had been forced to learn to write with his right hand by his teacher. It completely messed with his fine motor skills (and his confidence). I think you need to impress on the nanny and your mum how important it is to let her develop her own preferences.

I used to work in a nursery and we were taught that if handing a child a pair of scissors/paintbrush/pencil etc we should hold it directly in front of them (not to the left or right of them) so that they would choose which hand to use to take it from you. HTH.

ellceeell · 07/03/2006 09:32

I am left handed as are all three of my children. I used to worry that I was influencing them by unconsciously assuming left handedness, but I didn't - they were doing what came naturally for them. The only thing I encouraged was using a knife and fork "conventionally" and they all managed that, no problem. (I still drink the wine from a glass at my left hand, which can be a problem at dinner parties )

moondog · 07/03/2006 09:37

Eh??
It's 2006 not 1865!
I'm left handed and it causes me no problems whatsoever.

colditz · 07/03/2006 09:44

Tell your nanny qand your mother to leave her alone and stop bullying her to use the wrong hand.

sobernow · 07/03/2006 09:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Angeliz · 07/03/2006 09:47

I'm with the others who say leave her be.
If she is left handed then i don't think you can 'make' her be righthanded.
My dp is lefthanded and has no problems at all. I think she'll get evry confused to try and change what her body is naturally doing.

Angeliz · 07/03/2006 09:48

sobernow
Your poor brother.

MissChief · 07/03/2006 09:48

still vividly remember being forced by bully of school dinner lady to "eat properly" ie right-handed (and this at primary school in the 70s!)-my parents were furious when they found out! It made me clumsy as a child over eating/put me off food too for a long while.. so no, never force your child like this, it's cruel & unnecessary!

ghosty · 07/03/2006 09:51

To add to sobernow's comment ...
When I was teaching I used to make sure that left handed children always sat to the left of a right handed child (if they didn't sit next to another leftie of course) so that their writing hands didn't 'nudge' eachother IYSWIM?
As a teacher I didn't notice any 'problems' with lefties just because of their left handedness ...
Agree with everyone in that you should just let her do her own thing ....

To confuse everyone my DH does everything one handed with his right hand (eat, write, play tennis, bowl a cricket ball) but everything two handed with his left hand (golf, batting in cricket etc)

MissChief · 07/03/2006 09:53

..and btw lefthanded scissors is about all you'll need, it's not such a handicap you know!

Sponge · 07/03/2006 09:53

Couldn't agree more. We're not left handed but dd is. Her writing and drawing are, if anything, ggod for her age, although a bit smudgy if you're not careful. She uses normal scissors etc, no special lefty stuff. She automatically picked up spoons, pencils and so on with her left hand and we let her get on with it.
My dad was forced to write right handed and consequently no-one can read anything he writes - often including himself! Oddly he still eats left-handed. No idea why his parents thought that was OK but writing not.

fishie · 07/03/2006 09:55

i'm like dior, lh but use rh scissors etc. there are also some (mainly diy things) things i can do with either hand - using screwdriver, drill, painting etc, v useful. interestingly dp is very right handed, but eats lh - his mum lh. i think it often runs in the family, any others in your or dh family hazlinh?

coppertop · 07/03/2006 09:55

Ds2 (3yrs) is left-handed. It has never occurred to me to try to change that. He uses ordinary scissors with no problems whatsoever and probably grips a pencil better than his older brother can.

The nanny and your mother should let your dd 'decide' for herself which hand she wants to use most.

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