To ask what your three year old can do

[dappply]

My three year old DS was late walking ( 22 months) and when he did he never steadied up ( still falls regularly now). So we have been seeing a paediatrician and physio about that. His walking is very slowly improving, but I don't particularly have any concerns about his development otherwise

Today though he saw a different paediatrician, who was distressingly negative. She said he was slow in his speaking, needed a speech therapist. Slow in fine motor development, was unlikely to be able to write, would need a scribe and OT therapist.

I'm shocked, and don't know whether to be worried or angry. I think he's ok, a little slower than others perhaps but now I'm scared. He's already had a year of tests under neurologist and physio care, and seemingly there's nothing wrong with him.

So what can your three year old do? Does my boy sound terribly abnormal?

Movement- He can walk and run, climb, kick a ball, dance, but not jump yet, and is still wobbly on steps, falls over a lot. He can walk with his balance bike, but not run yet. He can't use a scooter. He can kick and reach out in the swimming pool, but can't float on his own.

Eating- he eats everything you give him pretty much, with a preference for using his hands. Can use cutlery messily, but needs encouragement. Makes a mess.

Drawing- can hold a pen and scribble, but no interest beyond that.

Speaking- new words everyday. Uses sentences, refers to the past, the future. Uses tenses. Not 100 percent clear, maybe half of what he says makes sense. But manages conversations with old ladies on bus and other children. Chatters away constantly. Males up lots of own words

Education- understands counting, can count uptown twenty but not necessarily in the right order. Understands colours and letters, but gets them wrong mainly. Remembers all his favourite story books and reads them to himself. Remembers words to songs.

Social- will talk to anyone, join in any game, likeable and happy. Can share easily although going through a stage of telling children to go away and pushing.

Sleep- sleeps 12 hours a night and 1-3 hour nap every day

Does he sound normal?

It is very distressing to be given bad news about your son's development. At least the paediatrian is offering practical help rather than just telling you that your son's development is delayed.

Your son found a bit like my son seven years ago.

Ds walked at 22 months and had child physio until 3 and half years old. My son also had problems with his speech due to glue ear. It may well be asking for a hearing test to rule out glue ear.

"he said he was slow in his speaking, needed a speech therapist. Slow in fine motor development, was unlikely to be able to write, would need a scribe and OT therapist."

My son was very slow with his fine motor skils and OT because of tendon problems. He can write reasonably at the age of ten. His writing is messy, but he cope well at school.

Intervention from theraphists will not make your son feel abnormal. You will probably only see them a handful of times. The therapists will support nursery staff or school staff with meeting his needs. The aim is to give your son the support in nursery so that he can cope with mainsteam education and reach his full potential.

My son's fine motor skills were on the 2nd centile when he was five and half years old. He can do joined up handwriting now. I can also boast that my son is on top table at school for every subject. He would never have achieved this without our lovely community paediatrian.