DS2 1yo Jealous and aggressive to DD1 3.5yo if i show her affection

[stripeysock]

DD1 is very affectionate to DS2. DS2 is incredibly clingy with me in general if I am in the room he wants to be on top of me cuddling. If DD1 wants to join in or if he notices me giving her a cuddle he pushes her away aggressively.

She has recognized this is inducing stress in me and has now started sitting on me whenever she sees him sitting on my knee. I try and cuddle all together but it turns into a violent squabble.

Really confused about how i should be handling this?

Help

My ds2 is exactly the same. He has always been like it. I stand up as I usually get hurt too. He feels second born second best. I am reading Siblings Without Rivalry. But we have ended up being assessed for family therapy as ds2 has probably flushed my £1250 diamond eternity ring down the toilet. It is centred around me. I'm sorry this is not very positive, but it is very difficult to know what to do as no amount of attention is ever enough. It is good to know it is not just me.

anyone else?

Very normal and it will pass

Keep on the 'all cuddle together' thing

make sure both get cuddles on their own with you as well

try and distract ds when he starts doing it

my ds does this as well if one of the others is on my lap, but it's much less than it used to be (he's 20m now)