Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

Do you allow your children to charge around the house and wrestle etc? Quick poll please as my ten year old DDs think I'm strict and miserable.

22 replies

sandyballs · 17/10/2011 14:19

Normally they don't charge around the house or wrestle but they have a couple of friends who love all this and when they visit it's bedlam, doors slamming, charging about, wrestling and knocking into stuff. They are big kids now, not tots and I worry things will get damaged or they will hurt themselves. I told them yesterday to calm down indoors or if they need to let off steam to go into the garden or over to the park, but not indoors. I did get quite cross about it as it pisses me off. DDs think I'm a misery and other say other parents allow it.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Ragwort · 17/10/2011 14:21

No - I don't allow it (although DS tries it on all the time with friends ) - they will get hurt or more seriously my things will get damaged/broken.

At 10 years old they should be perfectly capable of understanding this rule.

My DS has badly chipped a front tooth by this sort of stupid behaviour - yes, it was an accident but it could have been avoided .

suburbandream · 17/10/2011 14:21

Well, I try to discourage it but not with much success! Mine are 9 and nearly 8, and the minute my back is turned they are wrestling, jumping off the sofa, etc. Worse when friends are here.

Bert2e · 17/10/2011 14:22

Nope - outside only in this house too!

Octaviapink · 17/10/2011 15:25

Make them go outside if they want to charge/roll around. It's not unreasonable to expect sensible behaviour in the house from 10-year-olds but they have got a lot of physical energy so making them go to the park is fine, IMO. You could crash around in their bedroom/ break some of their stuff if you want to make the point!

EdithWeston · 17/10/2011 15:31

Yes, but only because they did martial arts and had some idea how to fight "nicely". It was as much practice/training as anything else. Also, there was an absolute rule that fighting was onlypermitted when everyone knew they were fighting (no ambushes or other random attacks). And never in the kitchen.

TheGoddessBlossom · 17/10/2011 15:34

This is my major bug bear, as mine do this ALL the time but they ARE boys and they ARE only 7 and 5. As soon as I leave the room they are rolling around on the floor, kicking and hitting, jumping off furniture. I go mad and have to split them up to get any peace. I try to imagine that they are just puppies and it's normal but normal or not I hate it, mainly because if I leave them to it someone gets hurt or something gets damaged. It's not always practical to say "go outside" as it's when we are about to go to school or we have just come in etc.

Other than separating them, if anyone has any suggestions I am all ears!!

SouthernandCross · 17/10/2011 15:40

I let my kids run around and wrestle in the house at times, why not?
I've just bought them one of these each recently and they have great fun shooting each other with them.
But they do have times where they have to sit down and be quiet, they don't rampage ALL the time.

HSMM · 17/10/2011 15:41

Not in my house

gigglepin · 17/10/2011 15:50

well, i dont like it, but my ds does play quite "actively".When friends visit he is all over the place and quite loud.
I have been critisised for allowing this kind of play.
Probllem comes when ds visits other peoples houses. I make absolutely clear that this behaviour is not allowed.
Nothing broken and no damaged kids yet.

So no i dont like it, i limit it, but it has caused lots of issues in the past.

MaryBS · 17/10/2011 15:52

. So long as they (we) don't jump on the furniture and show a little restraint so that things don't get broken, its actually quite good fun .

ditavonteesed · 17/10/2011 15:56

well I am currently without sofa for 7 - 14 days and will have a £160 bill so no they wont be allowed to do it anymore.

mrsravelstein · 17/10/2011 15:59

i get a bit of that when ds1 (also 10) has friends over. i do yell at them to calm down when the chandeliers start swinging and clattering downstairs but generally i try to leave them to it, i think it's What Boys Do.

Maisiethemorningsidecat · 17/10/2011 16:01

No - don't allow it in the house. It drives me mad, the noise carries and someone usually gets hurt. Point them in the direction of outside.

Deux · 17/10/2011 16:07

I always end up saying that if they want to behave like that they can go out to the garden even if it's dark/raining. My DS is only 7 and I feel I have to try to set some ground rules now or it's going to be even worse when he's 10.

I've also pointed out that his dad doesn't work all the hours he does so that DS can wreck the house and then we have to repair it.

I can tolerate a lot but not children behaving in a way that causes damage. DS has already broken his arm leaping off the sofa and broke the arm of a chair, so I've gone a bit zero tolerance. I've also told DS that if he breaks anything then the money is coming out of his bank account.

If he had his way he'd be swinging off the bannisters and stairs the whole time.

Octaviapink · 17/10/2011 16:16

I completely agree it's What Boys (and Children generally) Do - but they can jolly well do it in the fresh air!

HecateGoddessOfTheNight · 17/10/2011 16:22

I do. Up to a point. I let them run around as much as they want to. We've blocked off one of the doors to the kitchen now (needed space for fridge!) but when it was open they used to run in a circle - through kitchen door-out other kitchen door into living room - out other livingroom door into hall-back through kitchen door - round and round and round. Made me dizzy but it tires them out a bit

And they are forever bouncing around.

I stop them if they start leaping on furniture or get too physical with each other and they're not allowed to run round so much if we have guests, but apart from that doesn't hurt anything and keeps them active. Better that that turfing them out into the freezing cold (at this time of year) or sitting them down in front of tv/computer.

But we don't have much in the way of breakables around the house (only in the wall unit and that's out of harms way ) so there's really not much damage they could do.

AnyoneButLulu · 17/10/2011 16:33

Mine play rough all the time, they've never broken anything (or any person) doing it. Things do get broken from time to time, and children do get injuries, but mine have never done either during horseplay, maybe I'd be a bit less laissez faire if they had. DS has mild ASD and runs backwards and forwards up and down the corridor yelling for ten minutes every evening, so I'm desensitised to that sort of behaviour anyway, and we have a very small garden.

One of my fondest memories of my childhood is the day the new washing machine was delivered - we spent the afternoon using the cardboard box as a bobsleigh down the wooden staircase. Not sure I'd let my DCs do that now, but DB and I had a lovely time.

Original poster

sandyballs · 18/10/2011 09:48

Thanks all, mixed replies but mostly agree that best outside. I didn't think 10 year old girls would be quite like this [hhmm]. Why couldn't I have had quiet demure daughters who liked knitting and reading. We have recently spent a lot of money renovating our home so I think this is behind my anxiety! Because the house was a state before I was more relaxed, but at 10 they should understand that surely.

OP posts:

SouthernandCross · 18/10/2011 11:26

Sandyballs, I have three girls ( eldest is almost 10) and a younger son ( Almost 4) and often when I come back into the room, I'm greeted by the sight of the girls all rolling around on the floor together with a small boy perched on top and hanging on for dear life!
Girls are not the quieter sex in this house.
We haven't renovated yet and are waiting until they are all teenagers I think!

GooseyLoosey · 18/10/2011 11:31

Mine are 8 and 7 and they can charge around, as can their friends.

I have 2 rules:

They do not charge in the lounge, my bedroom or the dining room; and
They instantly stop charging if they reach the point when they are giving me a headache.

I want them to have fun in their home but appreciate that it is subject to limits.

notcitrus · 18/10/2011 11:45

Mine are only 3 but my rules are no door slamming and certain items of furniture they have to sit nicely on (eg high sofa, as if they fell off could hit heads on coffee table edges). Wrestling in their rooms or on the spare bed is fine - I figure if I can hear both of them giggling then I can continue to safely ignore them. :)

Our garden is small and all paved so I prefer wrestling play to be inside. Once they're 10 then then can go to the park up the road and do it there.

elfiro · 18/10/2011 12:46

I let them do this up to a point, as long as everyone is happy and they are all getting along etc.

Hate the doors slamming though, I just imagine broken fingers everywhere. I have threatened to take doors off hinges if it continues. (Not sure I even know how to do that....)

I think if you've had enough though, it's fair enough to tell them and send them outside. It's your house too. I do that sometimes. The might moan but tough.

Flip