Please tell me we are not the only family - new baby came home and my 22 month old rop

[deliakate]

on occasion managed to hit her. It would often happen when I was feeding and he would hit her on the head.

After the first two weeks I was alone in the house with them, so it was very hard to keep him totally away from her whilst I had to feed her, change, bathe etc. so often.

I feel so terrible I did not protect her enough, and I will never forget her scream if he managed to hurt her. I know he could not help it, and it was SO hard to avoid it happening. But I'm worried in case her brain has been affected - I have heard violence can change the wiring and make them withdrawn and have probs as adults. I feel so sad. She is now 4 months, DS is 2.2.

Dont worry - DD bit DS so hard that he had a bruised arm for a week when he was three weeks old. I think the risk is when there is continued sustained violence rather than incidents like this. Please don't be too sad about it.

Don't worry - it's perfectly normal - any of us who had older siblings probably got exactly the same treatment. You can't be there 100% of the time (and also you don't want to discourage him if he's being gentle) - all you can do is teach him that he's got to be kind to her. Small random acts like that won't hurt her brain/affect her development.