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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

How independent is your 8 year old?

26 replies

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:03

My DS is actually very independent, he helps himself in the kitchen. Makes toast, knows how to use the microwave, makes me cups of tea... Best part is he actually enjoys cleaning so will vacuum, do the dishes etc. He'll also run to the corner shop if I need something.

Don't know if this is normal for an 8 year old so just asking to see if anyone else is blessed with such and angelic child like myself :-D

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

rainbowinthesky · 17/09/2011 21:05

Careful. I was told on mumsnet that I shouldnt let my 15 year old ds be princessing around with pans.

orienteerer · 17/09/2011 21:05

Is this a joke?

DS, just turned 9, is no where near as perfect(?) as your DS.....

Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:09

I thinks it has to do with the fact that it has just been me and him since he was 5. I don't know, maybe I'm letting him be too independent? Should I stop him? I'm sure he wouldn't listen! He doesnt even wake me up on weekends, he happily opens the curtains and makes his own breakfast...

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Mowlem · 17/09/2011 21:15

My DD (almost 8) is very independent. I believe its good to be independent - and am now getting the rewards .

DD can make tea and toast, so now she makes DH and I breakfast in bed on a Sunday morning. Its even better now that the toast is edible, and coffee of a reasonable standard.

Shops are too far away for her to go alone (good 20 min walk) but she goes out to play, goes on errands. She pretty much gets herself ready for school / bed / showers herself etc etc

She tidies her own room, but doesn't hoover. She will help me dust sometimes. I can't stand needy children. She's very grown up and self assured. I like it that way.

Currently working on DD2 (4, almost 5), who can now make her own breakfast (cereal) can butter toast (once cooked), get herself dressed, wash herself in shower (needs just a little help now), packs own bookbag and brushes own hair.

Plonker · 17/09/2011 21:16

Why didn't you just start a thread stating how proud you are of your ds?

I don't understand why you're asking for comparisons

Mowlem · 17/09/2011 21:19

Was saying this the other day to mums, and one mum said to me that she wouldn't even stay in bed once her 7 year old was awake in case the child walked out the house alone. I was that she couldn't even trust a 7 year old to stay in the house.

orienteerer · 17/09/2011 21:20

foreveryours ....I suspect your DS may be perfect so don't worry.

Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:21

Yes I am very proud of my DS, I was just wondering if he is too young to be this independent, hence the thread title.
I wasn't trying to belittle others DC's....

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Plonker · 17/09/2011 21:25

I don't think a child is ever too young to be independent ...and I love the old adage 'never do for a child what they can reasonably do for themselves'.

Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:25

Oh he's far from perfect I'm sure!! We haeby reached the teenage years yet! I shall savour it whilst it lasts....

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Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:27

Mowlem, your DD sounds very independent! I'm sure your DD2 will learn everything for her sister.

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Plonker · 17/09/2011 21:28

I dont think there is anything unusual in what you say your ds does either, tbh. My 8yo dd does much the same (apart from make tea) and fwiw, I've never considered her to be excessively independent.

Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:33

I have friends with children the same age or older who don't do any of the stuff my DS does. Maybe they're just spolit and their mums like doing everything for them.

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Plonker · 17/09/2011 21:37

It's much down to the personality of the child though isn't it? I mean, my oldest would like me to run round after her all day. My second (the 8yo) can't be arsed waiting for me to get around to doing what she wants me to do, so she just gets on with it

bibbitybobbityhat · 17/09/2011 21:41

My ds has just turned 8 and cannot do any of the things you list in your op. He loves a cup of tea to drink, mind, but I wouldn't be happy about him pouring boiling water out of kettles etc.

bibbitybobbityhat · 17/09/2011 21:42

My dd, who is 2 and a half years older, is allowed to make us tea and use the microwave and go to the corner shop on her own.

Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:44

Haha! Yeah maybe I'm just a lazy ares

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Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:47

My DS never fills the kettle up more then it needs to be, so I'm not scared he'd burn himself. Hrs quite tall for his age (wears age 10 clothes) so has no problem reaching everything.

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Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:49

He wants to start going to school on his own which is about a 10min walk with no roads to cross...but I'm a little to nervous to let him. (I think he's just embarrassed that I kiss him good bye)

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JillySnooper · 17/09/2011 21:51

Dear god, my DH wasn't allowed to do any of that at 18. Mummy had to do it all for him

Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 21:53

Hahahaha

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maxcliffordslovechild · 17/09/2011 22:00

My DD 8 learnt how to make coffee for a brownie challenge, she makes a fairly decent one too, she also tidies her room (after a bit of nagging), makes toast, sandwiches and drinks for herself, she showers by herself now she can reach the controls but still needs reminding to brush her teeth twice a day, but all in all an independent miss.

DeWe · 17/09/2011 22:01

My eldest at 6yo used to get up and make breakfast for herself and her 3yr old sister without us getting up. They used to be very proud of doing it. Really sweet.
At 8yo she was making cakes (shortbread her favourite) on her own except getting them out of the hot oven. She's now 10 and if she asked to cook something I wouldn't have any qualms about letting her get on with it, with some restrictions.

Dd2 is (age 7) able to use the microwave and cook things like cheese on toast, although she finds the cheese slicer can be difficult if there's not much cheese left as she's only got one hand and it can be hard to hold.
Together they can now be pretty independent in the kitchen.
Ds at 4yo can now make his own porridge (with supervision) in the microwave, he loves to do it. He helped me make lesagne once and I found him putting grapes and chopped apple in... do you think Masterchef: the toddler version would take him?

I don't think it's much to do with having a brilliant child, so much as growing up in a house where these things are treated as normal and they are allowed to help. They were all helping to cook by 18 months in their own little way, we had a small set of steps for them to stand on to help, when I was cooking they'd usually be found next to me helping (and eating) with the ingredients. Ds comes running if he hears the food mixer in case he misses out on helping, and they'll all have times when they come and see what they can do to help.
We hope this means we'll be well catered for when they're teens.

Original poster

foreveryours · 17/09/2011 22:02

Oh I wish my DS would tidy his room, everywhere else he keeps clean and tidy. His room, no, won't even let me tidy it. If I do he has great fun in making it a bomb site again

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easylife73 · 17/09/2011 22:05

My DS2 is also aged 8 and is pretty independent - he makes us cups of tea (albeit grudgingly), sorts his own breakfast at weekends (microwaves croissants, or gets cereal). He has been known to use the hoover, dust and help with cooking/food preparation. Over the summer, he has been allowed to go to the park at the end of the road with his older brother, showing even greater independence by persuading said older brother to take £10 from his piggy bank to go to the shop and buy Magnums, cans of drinnk and a carrier bag full of sweets. Fairly sure I was making tea etc when I was his age.

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