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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

My 6 year old daughter is overweight, despite my best efforts. How can I help her?

91 replies

mummyloveslucy · 29/07/2011 20:05

Hi, my 6.5 year old daughter is very tall for her age but also a bit overweight. She eats quite healthily when she's at home but I'm aware that my MIL tends to feed her crisps, sweets and basically what ever she asks for when she's at her house. I've spoken to her about it before, but she just agrees not to, then does it anyway.
She tends to eat a lot of bread. It used to be white, but recently, she'll eat wholmeal as long as it's not seaded. She likes fruit but will only eat carrots un desgised. She'll eat most other vedgetables liquedised as soup.
She doesn't have much of a sweet tooth but loves cheese, yogart and crisps.
I'm not a great cook but always try to avoid highly processed foods high in sugar and fat.
She also excercises quite a lot. We love going on country walks together and she does ballet once a week.
I could do with some tips to help her to loose weight and get fitter. Both my DH and I were very slim as children but my mum and her sister were always overweight and still are. Could it be genetic?
Anyway, I'd be very greatful for any advice.

OP posts:

wellwisher · 01/08/2011 12:29

I assumed there was no DP given that the DD goes to her grandma when OP is working

CoteDAzur · 01/08/2011 12:50

"HE"? I would be very surprised if OP's daughter is a "he".

OP does talk about a DH, but he doesn't seem to be taking care of their daughter during the day, as she is cared for by MIL.

curlyredhead · 01/08/2011 12:58

LIZS meant HE = Home Ed, so 'HE is shared' meaning Home Ed is shared.

CaptainNancy · 01/08/2011 13:02

arf at 'he' mix-up!

The DD was in a school, but wasn't being fully supported with her additional needs IIRC (please feel free to correct me MLL). I think they are in a pretty rural area where school places and work are hard to come by, so you take what you can get...

CoteDAzur · 01/08/2011 16:30

Oops

Again, if Home Ed is shared with OP's DH, then why is their DD at MIL three days of the week?

What are her "additional needs"?

I am not trying to grill the OP, just trying to understand if there might be a reason why her DD is overeating.

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 01/08/2011 16:54

I've been to the docs with her today. He says the development is nothing to worry about, and just to keep an eye on it.

He checked her hight and weight and she isn't over weight! She is off the scale for hight, and her weight matches that.

I am relieved, but still need to make sure MIL isn't overdoing it. She has her 3 mornings a week at worst. If my DH shifts and mine work out well, she might only have her her for one morning.

OP posts:

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 01/08/2011 19:27

bump

OP posts:

LemonDifficult · 01/08/2011 19:37

Sorry, OP, got to agree with Quint. And all those who've said an extra gym class or swimming lesson won't help.

Portion sizes, praise for eating (pretty basic stuff, no?), and fatty foods are the problem. If you think your DD is overweight then she probably is, given what you've described.

Is your MiL overweight btw?

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 01/08/2011 19:43

With me, her portion sizes are always small. She never finishes her meals, which are small to start with. She gets plenty of fruit and vedge. At MIL's it's different. She tends to eat a lot more. (Maybe it's my cooking she doesn't like)

MIL is overweight.

OP posts:

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 01/08/2011 20:03

My daughter is quite small boned like myself and I think you can look overweight even when you're not realy. (I know I haven't explained myself very well but hopefully you'll know what I mean).

OP posts:

justaboutWILLfinishherthesis · 01/08/2011 20:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 01/08/2011 20:18

It is harder to explain that she can't have everything she wants. This includes things in shops too. I'd say it was the same as with a younger child.

It's interesting about regulating appetite as sometimes she eats very little for a day or so, then she seems very hungry other days.

OP posts:

CaptainNancy · 01/08/2011 21:00

Does your MIL show her love through food? It sounds as if this is more the issue tbh.

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 01/08/2011 21:17

I think so. She loves cooking and feeding people. Everyone gets well fed when they come to visit her. I've put on a bit since meeting my DH 13 years ago.

OP posts:

sequinart · 01/08/2011 21:19

agree with others. country walks plus one ballet class is not enough exercise. Plus water ONLY for drinking and portion size also key as others have said. Milk, cheese and crisps are all very fattening. Also too much fruit isnt great as it contains a lot of sugar and can encourage cravings. Veggies MUCH better.

sequinart · 01/08/2011 21:20

sorry, completely missed the bit about significant SN. I am sure that must make things harder.

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 01/08/2011 21:34

She gets tired very easily too. We did a lot of walking today, then went to a play centre. She layed down in there and refused to play, she said she was too tired. She eventually did have a play, then came home and fell asleep.

She has a problem with drinking enough. We really have to force her to drink little sips throughout the day. We tried only water, but she just got dehydrated as she wasn't drinking enough of it. It was a real battle, as she sufferes from constipation she really does need to drink plenty. The only things she likes are drinks with flavour. She does like the volvic touch of fruit, sugar free though.
What do you recommend re the water? Should we just persuvere with it? It would be great if she would. We tried a special bottle that only has water in it, but the novelty wore off pretty quickly when she realised it didn't taste of anything.

OP posts:

CaptainNancy · 01/08/2011 21:49

Maybe slices of lemon or lime in there? I don't imagine there's any calories in that (or sugar)

CoteDAzur · 01/08/2011 22:28

How tall is your DD that 32 kgs is "not overweight" for a 6 year old? I'm very curious now.

CoteDAzur · 01/08/2011 22:30

Also, could you answer the questions re what her SN is and how she is homeschooled, given that she is with MIL three days of the week?

RitaMorgan · 01/08/2011 22:39

Maybe she's homeschooled the other 4 days a week! School children only go to school 30 hours a week.

annh · 01/08/2011 22:40

I thought your dd was also at a childminders one day a week? What is she eating when she is there?

insanityscatching · 01/08/2011 22:58

If dd is showing signs of puberty alongside her being off the charts for height and weight then the GP should be considering precocious puberty and checking her hormone levels I should think.
For a child that is developmentally delayed coping with early puberty and menstruation would be doubly difficult and I think you need to make sure this isn't happening to dd really.

CaptainNancy · 02/08/2011 00:02

cote- she is height of a 9yo ^says up there.

CoteDAzur · 02/08/2011 07:54

Which is what, in the UK?

I'm not trying to be difficult, but these averages are different in different countries. (My DC were called "giants" by their paed here in France but their heights were in line with averages of where I come from, for example)

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