My 6 year old daughter is overweight, despite my best efforts. How can I help her?

[mummyloveslucy]

Hi, my 6.5 year old daughter is very tall for her age but also a bit overweight. She eats quite healthily when she's at home but I'm aware that my MIL tends to feed her crisps, sweets and basically what ever she asks for when she's at her house. I've spoken to her about it before, but she just agrees not to, then does it anyway.
She tends to eat a lot of bread. It used to be white, but recently, she'll eat wholmeal as long as it's not seaded. She likes fruit but will only eat carrots un desgised. She'll eat most other vedgetables liquedised as soup.
She doesn't have much of a sweet tooth but loves cheese, yogart and crisps.
I'm not a great cook but always try to avoid highly processed foods high in sugar and fat.
She also excercises quite a lot. We love going on country walks together and she does ballet once a week.
I could do with some tips to help her to loose weight and get fitter. Both my DH and I were very slim as children but my mum and her sister were always overweight and still are. Could it be genetic?
Anyway, I'd be very greatful for any advice.

[CoteDAzur]

I found online that avg 9 yr old girl is 49 inches = 124 centimeters (not sure if this is UK avg) My DD is 123 cm and she is not yet 6, and she weighs 20 kgs.

So yes, I do think that this little girl's height is relevant, especially if she weighs over 30 kgs.

Her SN is also relevant and I don't understand why OP is not saying what it is.

[Chandon]

Children who are at school have a break three times a day (between 1-1.5 hrs in total) where they RUN around like mad.

I imagine a HE child would not get that, as it typically happens when lots of kids are together, they start to play "catch" and "it".

That would make a BIG difference.

Kids run around a lot if you let them.

Most children I know eat crisps and biscuits every day and are thin as rakes due to the running around and playing as well as doing sport.

[LIZS]

124cm seems on the low side for height. Clothing sizes put it between 128cm and 140cm but there is a huge range - ie dd (9) is about 130 and 21kg !

I don't think MLL is being deliberately evasive btw about her dd's SN . afaik from other threads she has a S & L delay/verbal dyspraxia but that may well co-exist with dyspraxia and other conditions as yet undiagnosed. I'd agree that many of those with LD's have issues relating to appetite, diet and weight, partly out of lack of comprehension and partly due to cravings for "wrong" types of food and associated medical problems. MLL, has your dd ever been tested for intolerances ?

[mummyloveslucy]

Hi, yes she has speech and language difficulties and global developmental delay. She's basically like a 5 year old mentally.

The Dr measured her at 4 foot 4inches.

[CoteDAzur]

So your DD is mine +8 months, +9 cm, and +10 kgs. That still sounds overweight to me, but then again, you know that which is why you started this thread.

Mentally, a 5 year old isn't so different than a 6 year old. Is there really no way that she can go to a school? Isn't one-on-one help available for children with special needs in mainstream schools? As others have said, she would be much more active throughout the day and have far fewer opportunities to raid MIL's closet of biscuits and crisps if she were at school during week days.

As for drinking water, a 5 year old is perfectly capable of understanding that sweets are treats, including sweet drinks. Just stop buying juices and other sweet drinks. Unless your DD has a biological problem that prevents her from recognizing thirst, she will drink water when she is thirsty. Of course, she will resist this in the beginning, but you need to patiently explain to her that sweet drinks are finished, no, you can't buy any more, and here is water for when she is thirsty.

[sequinart]

I firmly believe that one of the main causes of children not controlling their appetite naturally is too much sugar. So even sweetened drinks, although may not strictly contain sugar, keep the brain craving sweet things. Fruit also!

I think it is clear from your OP and first few messages that SN or no, your daughter eats too much fat and sugar and doesn't do enough exercise. Obviously only you can tell what cutbacks that will work with your daughter and how you can manage more exercise in her life.

[mummyloveslucy]

Yes, she is t night. During the day she has about 1-2 accidents of both kinds. If you listen to her speek she sounds like a 3 year old, sometimes I don't understand what she's saying.
She's definatly more delayed in some areas than others.
I don't think it's relevent to this problem though. She does understand that crisps etc are a treat.

[Al0uiseG]

No food she ever be a "treat" food is just fuel for the body and we need quality fuel to make us work properly. Her SN won't make this any easier for you but as you are the adult you need to control her intake and Mil will have to fall in or she's complicit in storing up problems for the future.

[TeaOneSugar]

My dd is 6 yrs 8 months and the height of a tall 9 year old, she's about 138 cm (measured her the other day for rollercoaster purposes), so just over 4' 5" and I think last time I weighed her she was about 4 stone 8lb.

She's on the cuddly side, but not overweight, her clothes are generally aged 9, which is right for her height.

Height is more relevant than age in my personal opinion.

[ihavenewsockson]

I really think you should get a second opinion. It sounds like precocious puberty to me, my friend's daughter had this- she was off the height charts, had BO, started developing breast buds at 5.
Please get her checked by another doctor, just in case. Better to be safe than sorry.

[insanityscatching]

Ihavenew that's just what I was thinking and would have thought that the GP should be considering this unless MLL and her dh are exceptionally tall themselves and her dd's height isn't out of synch for their family.
It would be traumatic for a child not yet toilet trained and developmentally delayed to have to cope with menstruation so would be insisting this was investigated.

[Bonsoir]

According to the information you have given on this thread (DD is 6.5, weighs 4 stone and 3 pounds and is 5 foot tall), she is very large for her age but not "off the scale". Are you and/or your DH very large? My DD has a friend who is very tall and muscular and looks more like a ten year old than the seven year old she is. But her father is immensely tall (he is from Hamburg) and so there is nothing untoward about his daughter following in his genetic footsteps.

I don't think that your MIL is instilling good eating habits, however, and she needs to be reined in!

[insanityscatching]

Bonsoir I think MLL says height is 4 feet 4 inches and weight 5 stone but would agree if family genetics fit then the height would be more to be expected then.

[mummyloveslucy]

I was very tall as a child, like my daughter. I was quite chubby until about 4, then became thinner and thinner until I was very skinny. I stayed this way until I had my daughter. Now I'm more average. I stopped growing at about 13 and I'm now 5 foot 5. The doc predicted that I was going to be 6 foot 2 as an adult.

My husband was average hight and weight I think.

[mummyloveslucy]

She did actually go to school up until last christmas. She was the same size then as she is now. She hasn't put on weight since being home educated. If anything she's slimmed down a bit, as she's out in the fresh air all the time. We only do 1 hour a day of formal work, which is plenty as it's one to one. Then we're out and about. I don't drive, so we have to walk everywhere. We also live on a huge hill.
I don't think it makes any difference her being home educated, appart from the fact that she spends time down her grandmas who can't seem to say no to her. I will look in to this though and see what can be done.