2-month-old not getting enough sleep?

[Marabou]

I must admit I haven't read any books on baby development etc. which I probably should have being a first time mom .. So I'm pretty clueless with all this sleep training I have been reading about on here..

Anyway, DS is 9 weeks and up until recently was sleeping quite well at night with only one or two brief feeds between 11pm and 8am (he is exclusively breastfed by the way). During the day he slept all together about 5 to 6 hours in two or three naps and seemed happy and content with a regular schedule. However, about two weeks ago he started having a very difficult time trying to get to sleep both during the day and night. He generally has a bad sleep day about every other day and on those days he hardly sleeps during the day and at night wakes up every 1,5 hours. During the day he will drift off to sleep briefly and then wake up after 15 to 30 minutes and is very cranky and tired throughout the day. During the night he is fussy in his cot and it almost sounds like he's having a bad dream, as he cries a little bit every ones in a while.

At first I thought he was just going through a growth spurt, as I read babies often have one at around 6 weeks, but he's now 9 weeks and it hasn't stopped.. Also, during the night he's ok sleeping on his back and swaddled in his cot, but during the day he refuses to sleep anywhere else but on the living room sofa on his tummy on a large pillow (someone is in the room all the time to make sure his nose and mouth aren't covered of course..). I read somewhere that you are not supposed to swaddle babies for too long, as this restricts their movement and admittedly DS seems to wiggle himself free during the night, so I wonder if I should just try to stop swaddling him? Also, should I try and get him to sleep on his back at all times and how can I do this? I've tried putting him in his cot on his back during the day, but he just won't have it and wakes up immediately as his back touches the bed..

Sorry about the long post, but I hope someone could help. I just feel sorry for him, as he seems to be getting really tired and I think he's too young to stay up the whole day ..

Oh I am sorry, I remember how tired I was when my dc were as little as your ds. All my dc were different in their sleep patterns. The first thing I would say, is was told and I believe that you can not "spoil" a child in the first year, so if he wants to sleep downstairs on the sofa during the day, go with it, and get yourself some rest at the same time. I used to lie on the sofa with my ds alseep on my tummy, we both used to get skleep togther. I felt that the most important thing was that they learnt to distinguish between day sleeps and night sleeps, for my ds he slept downstairs during the day, my dd1 slept in the pram in the house during that day, and dd2 slept upstairs but I didn't close the curtains so it was light. My ds loved being swaddled, he startled all the time when he was not and woke himself, as far as development is concerned, I think as long as they aren;t swaddled all the time 24/7 it really isn't a problem. My dc all went thrugh more restless times, when they slept less, they came out the other side. I breastfed too, it could be that wind is disturbing his sleep, or he needs to feed a bit more and his tummy is empty. Sorry not to be much help, but I wanted you to know you weren't alone.

you might want to stop swaddling, see if hes happier on his back not being swaddled - maybe try some kind of grobag? we stopped swaddling about 11 - 12 weeks coz DD kept on getting herself loose and waking up and the grobag did the trick.

also have you had him weighed lately? i'm sure you're doing a wonderful job breastfeeding but my sister in law recently found out that her milk supply wasn't quite doing the job in terms of helping her DS put on weight at the right rate even though she fed him every 2-3 hours. and its a sure fact that sound sleep is connected to a full satisfied tummy! in the end my SIL gave an extra bottle of formula every day and this really helped.

oh and i agree, don't worry too much about where he sleeps right now!

good luck! you'll figure it out soon don't worry :)

I am also a first time mummy and I would for sure recommend reading up on some sleep issues in babies. Books are by no means the answer to everything but they helped me a LOT to find my way around the first few months. Frankly I don't know what I would do without them! :)

Your baby is still tiny and I also remember how hard it was at the beginning. She's now 8 months and a great sleeper (for now). I would agree with pp that for now you should do what you can just to get by and not worry too much where and how the little one is sleeping. I started a loose bed time routine when my DD was 3 weeks and she is still in it to this day. I did exactly the same thing every night (even if it did not work at times) and at some point she just clicked that it was time for bed! She slept swaddled till she was 3 months.

Daytime naps were a real struggle and I ended up walking for miles every day as she would only sleep in her pram. I was told that this would have an adverse effect BUT she is asleep in her cot as we speak so go figure! With a baby this small I don't think it matters 'how' as long as you (and the baby) gets some rest.

Here here, lie on the sofa, with your ds, get some sleep, try not to worry and swaddle away if it helps, stop it if he has grown out of it. Trial and error. How are you feeling?

Hey everyone and thanks so much for reassurance!

SparkleRainbow, I used to sleep with him on my tummy too, but unfortunately ever since he's learned to balance his head a little more he doesn't like the idea to rest against my tummy anymore; he wants to see around himself all the time.. So I'm either walking around with him over my shoulder or in my arms so he can look at the lights in the ceiling.. I just got a sling for him so I'll have to try to get him used to that so I could have my hands free..

greenshoot19, thanks for bringing up the weight issue. I think DS is putting on weight well though; he was 7.2lb at birth, 11lb at 5 weeks and 13.8lb just last week at 8 weeks.. He's had formula just a few times when we've been out and about in the beginning when I wasn't confident enough to breastfeed in public or I hadn't had time to pump, but nowadays he only gets breastmilk. My mom keeps saying though, that at the rate he's growing I'll probably have to introduce solids earlier than at 6 months. I'm a bit sceptical about that though, as I read that his system would not be ready before that. I'm not sure if that's true..

TheJoyfulPuddlejumper, I just use a blanket to swaddle him, but it's getting a bit small for him, so the velcro wrap could be better, I should look into it.. I'm also thinking to get him a 1 tog grobag for the summer. He has one but it's 2.5 tog and would be too warm for him at the moment..

Momo36, are there any particular books you would recommend? I had a look on Amazon and saw this one, which had got a lot of positive reviews:

www.amazon.co.uk/Your-Baby-Week-ultimate-caring/dp/0091910552/ref=sr_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1310495131&sr=1-3

But I didn't buy it for now..

Gosh, I wish my DS would settle in his pram! He used to love going for a walk in the pram, but nowadays he wakes up the minute I step out the door and starts crying about 5 to 10 minutes into the walk, so I'm terrified to go anywhere :(. Especially as I have all this baby weight to shift and would love to get some exercise..

op the book The wonder weeks tells you all about the sleep regressions and developmental spurts that can affect lo's. I haven't actually read it but have been given lots of info from it on here. I always found it really helpfull to know there was a reason for sleep rough patches. And therefore that they would end!

Good on you for going back to ebf. Ignore your mil. Wean when your ds is developmentally ready. Bm is the best thing for her till then (and after!)

My ds has been through loads of different sleep phases, inc where and when he'll sleep. Personally i just go with it. It will all sort it's self out. I just cosleep, nap and ignore housework to get by!

Will your ds sleep in a sling? That would allow you to do stuff while he naps...but you are allowed to just sit and hold him. You both get a rest then. They get easier to put down as time goes by, it,s to do with their sleep cycles and not a habit.

i've got Gina Fords weaning book which has been helpful and she suggests some babies do need weaning by 4 months - so you might want to check her book out if you want some advice as to whether this might be the case for your DS and if so what types of food suits their systems at that age :)

BTW -if you don't have strong feelings about using a dummy, you could try using one if he's getting himself quite worked up in the pram or going to sleep, (for me it was a life saver!)

Thanks again for all the helpful tips! It really is a struggle sometimes to try to understand what LO needs .. I'll have a look at both the books you recommended, I'm sure they'll be a big relief!

So far DS absolutely hates the sling for the same reason he no longer likes sleeping on my tummy; he doesn't see anything when he's facing me.. I'll keep trying though, as I'm having to travel with him alone in about a months time and I'll have to check-in his buggy so will have to carry him around at the airport..

Yep, have tried a dummy, but DS rarely takes it :(.. It looks like he gets frustrated when there's no milk coming and just gets upset with it...

Greenshoots I haven't read the GF book and am curious...what evidence does she give for early weaning? How does she suggest you tell if it's suitable for your lo? And what foods does she recommend? Sorry...I don't want you to transcribe the book...it just contradicts (almost) everything i have been told.

Marabu - m ds is 10 weeks and we've had some ishoos with naps! I'm a bad mum cause I sleep him on his tummy, but it means he's able to settle himself to sleep about 75% of the time.

My big breakthroughs came when I a) learnt to recognise his tired signs and get him to bed (in his cot preferably) ASAP and b) realised that he often grizzles and shouts before dropping off to sleep. This happens in his cot but also when we're out. So your LO might be protesting not because he's necessarily upset, but because he's struggling to nod off.

I have a ten minute rule from putting him down. I always make sure he's fed, burped etc and then cuddle/rock him until he's flopping/yawning/rubbing eyes etc. I then put him down. If he's still shouting or sounds upset, I'll go and pat him. Always try to avoid picking him up unless he really isn't settling - but you can work up to that.

Fond baby whisperer helpful for understanding sleepy signs. And no cry sleep solution good for practical advice.

Good luck!

My 8 months old nephew was not getting enough sleep then I find enough tips for new moms I gave this suggestion to my sister in low and get good results.