4 kids driving me round the bend

[khal]

Hi all, It seems that as my kids have been getting older the bounderies we had seem to have dwindled.
Now my house is full of bickering, shouting, no one is listening and everything seems up in the air.
As a single working parent with no support I have let things go, my eldest wants more space from the others then is possible, my youngest seems to ignore what I ask him to do and even just laughs and the 2 girls in the middle seem to spend an hour getting changed etc.
How do you bring back the bounderies and what tips, hints, ideas etc can I use to get a 12, 8, 7, & 6 year old back on track.
Any advice appreciated

I hear you... Is your 12 year old a him or a her? Either way is there any way you could allocate some time when he/she could be alone in their room, like a private time? Maybe you could try laying out the clothes you want the 8 and 7 year olds to wear (give them 30 minutes to change then wean down to 15-ish). As for the 6 year old you need to let him know that laughing at your requests is unacceptable. The sooner you nip this in the bud the better. I had similar problems in the past and felt like everything was closing in on me. I knew they were good kids at heart but I think my mistake was trying to deal with everything at once. Concentrate on one issue at a time and perhaps the road will not be too hard. Unfortunately bickering and shouting goes with the territory but perhaps you can reign it in one step at a time. You need to be consistent, (easier said than done when you have to deal with everything alone) but after the initial rebellion you can do it! Don't expect everything to be plain sailing at first but hopefully a few weeks or months of trying might smooth the bumps a bit. Is there no one who can help you at all? I hope it all works out for you, you have the strength.

Thank you for your response, it definitely makes sense. Now that I?ve got a few days off work I intend to focus on things and see how best to improve things, as you said one step at a time :)

Khal - get thee to bed for a good night's sleep - tomorrow is another day.