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Original poster

Very early days -feeding & sleeping tips needed

28 replies

felinebelle · 28/06/2011 05:42

Hi - our wee one is literally a matter of days old so I lnow it's far too early to talk routines and day/night. But we've a couple of issues I was hoping for som advice on.
Firstly - she's an angel during the (our) day - sleeping well after a feed and feeding well.
But then she'll a) not sleep anywhere but on me or OH and b) suggest she's finished feding with all the right signs (coming off the breast on her own, refusing anymore from either breast), but 5-15 minutes later she'll be back for more.
I know it's partly down to the hot weather so she's extra thirsty rather than hungry - but is there anything else I can do to make sure she's completely full, and which may also help her sleep?

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Tigresswoods · 28/06/2011 08:35

Not really. You pretty much have to ride it out and just keep feeding. Eventually her titchy tummy will start to expand to take more milk in. It is hard and I was googling "when does it get easier?" at 3 weeks but give it time.

Congrats Grin

camdancer · 28/06/2011 09:30

DD2 is 3 weeks old and last night was the first night she hasn't slept on me at all in the night. I think after 2 weeks she finally spent some time in the moses basket and it has been a gradual change since then. It will change. I know you don't quite believe me as every day feels like a month at the moment but it will change gradually.

irishqueen · 28/06/2011 09:59

Buy a beanbag! Put a nice blanket over it and place her on that. You can mould it to the correct shape so she's all supported and feels snuggled, saved my life with all 3

irishqueen · 28/06/2011 09:59

Buy a beanbag! Put a nice blanket over it and place her on that. You can mould it to the correct shape so she's all supported and feels snuggled, saved my life with all 3

bessie26 · 28/06/2011 10:30

I think DD2 spent her first 3-4 weeks sleeping on me every night too. I was a bit worried, but figured she'd spent the last 9 months sleeping inside me, so it'll take her a while to adjust to sleeping in her bed!

For a few days she slept on her mattress beside me in bed, then in her Moses basket. Then I remembered about swaddling! Grin She's now 9wks & sleeping for 6-7hr stretches at night GrinGrin
Hang in there, it will get better soon!

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh · 28/06/2011 13:07

All sounds very normal and like you are doing really well. As others have said there will be tiny changes everyday that make your life easier, so take it moment by moment.

Sack off any housework/social stuff. It can all wait. Just hang out with your lo and feed feed feed. You'll soon have a lovely established supply of milk and efficient feeding baby.

Pass the baby to someone else while you have a bath/walk whatever keeps you sane!

Bessie is very lucky that her lo is sleeping through at nine weeks. Envy This is very unusual ime so please don't worry if that doesn't happen in your house...though it's nice to know there's a chance! Grin

trixie123 · 28/06/2011 13:26

if she get overfull she'll just throw it back up - at 4am this this morning I stomped out of bed, threw the muslin in the washbasket declaring how bloody fed up I was with being covered in baby sick!. (DD2) Little and often is better when they are THAT tiny but it does mean you are pretty much pinned to the sofa. Really just go with it for the first few weeks, though I would advocate trying to get her used to sleeping on her own ASAP or it will become a habit that is harder to break. It may mean letting her cry a little at first as well but this will not harm her. In the meantime, a sling (a comfy wrap one) is a very good idea. She will be all snuggled into you (more so than a baby-bjorn) and you can get on with some things.

bessie26 · 28/06/2011 13:50

moon I'm up around 2am feeding her, that's not "sleeping through" in my book! Grin

I've found the swaddling really helps, stops them hitting themselves in the face with their flailing arms! Grin

julantal · 28/06/2011 17:21

swaddling and postion the baby on their side this may hel place a rolled up blanket behind her back to keep position i have a three week old myself- just hang in there this is my third so i know in the back of my mind this too shall pass.

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh · 28/06/2011 19:08

Bessie you just reminded me of that crazy floating arms thing newborns do when startled Grin

moonstorm · 28/06/2011 19:59

Are you breastfeeding? Check out Kellymom and 'cluster feeding' as well - she might feed and feed and feed and feed and feed. It's normal Smile

bessie26 · 28/06/2011 22:01

Oooh congrats moon! I'm sure DD1 used to have a floaty leg! Grin & 5 hrs == sleeping through? Pah! What a load of rubbish!

OP - is it very hot where you are? DD2 had been going about 3hrs between feeds, but that's gone down to around 2.5hrs since it got hot. This afternoon, she fed for 20mins, had a 10min break & then demanded another 20mins! It's obviously very thirsty work being a baby! Grin

Cheeseandbiscuits · 28/06/2011 23:22

This sounds very similar to my DD.

She didn't sleep anywhere other than with us for 8 weeks or so. We decied to cosleep for our sanity. We started her off in her crib, then when we couldn't settle her she came in with us for the night. Eventually, she settled in her crib and now sleeps on her own in her cot for 12 hours a night from 7pm-7am with a dream feed at 1030pm (17 weeks old now)!

She also cluster fed for12 weeks from 4pm - 3am. I gave up BF at 12 weeks because of it and am now starting to regret it.

Original poster
felinebelle · 29/06/2011 01:04

Yes it is very hot so she may well be extra thirsty. We have small bottle of cooled boiled water on stand by now for when she's fed and fed and fed but still wants
something. Guessing she may also get fulller easier now my proper milk's coming through.
As for the sleeping - well, one thing at a time. I figure we'll get the feeding right first and let her sleep on us for a little while longer, because at least she is sleeping so me and OH wil just grab a couple of hours here and there for the time being. And I'll enjoy the cuddles while they last!

OP posts:
Starchart · 29/06/2011 01:10

Water is not safe to give to a bf baby.

Original poster
felinebelle · 29/06/2011 01:21

Well, as with everything it seems, it depends who you listen to. It's not that it's not safe - if boiled and cooled - it's that there's no nutrients in it. But if she's drained my breasts she's got all the nutrients she needs and just needs a tiny bit more hydrating. As it is we haven't resorted to it yet, but it's either that or formula...

OP posts:
bessie26 · 29/06/2011 05:03

frequent nursing

bessie26 · 29/06/2011 05:07

giving water to bf babies

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh · 29/06/2011 08:50

feline your breasts are never "drained". They are always making more milk.

They're a river not a pond. (have nicked that off here somewhere Grin )

moonstorm · 29/06/2011 08:57

And the more she feeds, the more you produce (if you are worried that you don't have enough).

My winter babies fed all the time as well. It might not just be down to thirst...

RitaMorgan · 29/06/2011 09:00

Please don't give water to a newborn baby! She doesn't need anything but breastmilk until she's on solids.

If she's had both sides, you can put her back on the first side again and keep swapping as many times as you want - this is great for the baby and great for your supply, you really can't feed too much.

matana · 29/06/2011 09:29

Congratulations! Grin

She'll be feeding more regularly to build up your milk supply, which is particularly low in the evening and at night. Her tummy is also tiny so fills, and empties, quickly at the moment. If it's possible for you to catch up on sleep during the day then do it.

The only other tips i have is to stick with it, you're doing a great job and do anything you can so both you and your LO can sleep. If that's sleeping on you then so be it - enjoy the cuddles, it's such a wonderful time and you'll never get it back again! Invest in a sling so you can get on with things when she wants to sleep during the day. And don't worry about spoiling her with 'bad sleep habits' at this young age - rock, carry, sling, co-sleep, take her for walks and drives, play her music etc etc. And just do subtle things to help her distinguish between night and day - low lights, quiet in the evening and noisy and bright in the daytime etc.

Kiwiinkits · 30/06/2011 01:35

It sounds like she's sucking for comfort rather than food/water. I would try swaddling and a dummy. You may be 'against' dummies but believe me sucky babies love them. I used one for my DD from 0 - 4 months and took it away without issue at 4 months. Lifesaver.

Your breasts may be a 'river' but we all completely understand that you don't want to be stuck to the couch all the time, day and night. You have a right to a bit of peace! Try the dummy.

PinkSchmoo · 30/06/2011 10:58

It's quite possible that she is full and is just tired.

Do you know what your nipple looks like if she is drawing properly? Don't mean to sound patronising. Should be elongated. If she is just sucking for comfort it will be more normal. If unsure take her off and look when you know she has been feeding really well so you know and then if you aren't sure in future stop her and check. If she is really sucky consider a dummy - they have a need to suck for comfort but this is need up to c4 months after that habit so unless you want a fight get rid then.

Best thing you can do is swaddle. She will hate it but she doesn't realise that her arms and legs belong to her so if she is thrashing wildly her perception is that someone else is doing it to her. Imagine how you would feel if someone repeatedly hit you in the face and lifted and dropped your legs when you were trying to nap? Swaddle. She will fight it but you must persevere. Sorry, both mine have been trussed up like turkeys.

If you need a break do consider formula. DD was ebf. DS has got the odd bottle when my boobs couldn't take any more. Better that than being so fed to the back teeth of bf that you stop earlier than you would like.

Good luck and welcome to the rollercoaster.

tiktok · 30/06/2011 11:09

A baby just days old is like this because that is what babies days old are hard wired to do :)

They don't need dummies.

They definitely don't need water (and should not have water).

They don't (usually) need swaddling - having hands free is part of the experience of touching and staying in touch with their mother (having said that some babies might be ok with swaddling as they seem to need help to calm down - but try leaving hands free at first).

A young baby who only really sleeps well on the body of a loving parent is normal.

Grown ups' job is to let all that happen and be waited on hand and foot with lots of TLC.

Messing about trying to get the baby to sleep more or longer is harder work than just accepting it all, IMO :)