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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Sleep cues and childminder - being a wee bit PFB?

11 replies

SharkSkinThing · 22/06/2011 13:34

This is going to seem like a ludicrous question in a few weeks time, I'm sure, but it's concerning me, so I want to get it sorted whilst I can. So, help!

DS will be going to a childminder at the end of July when he turns one, and I go back to work.

When he goes down for his afternoon nap, we have a little cuddle, a few sips of milk from his cup, and then I switch on his lullaby thingy for five minutes, give him his dummy, and bingo, he's out like a light.

But - should I wean him off this? So that when he goes to her he just has the bare minimum? He never has it at night (or at any other time). Or should I get one for the childminder?!

Feel free to (verbally) kick me up the arse for being so PFB...

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MissHonkover · 22/06/2011 13:46

My CM is very good at replicating what DD is used to. It makes life easier for her too, after all, if DD settles easily.

We also have milk and a music box thing for a nap, and DD also goes into her sleeping bag. Our CM is happy to do all this, she has a little music box that she uses so we don't take ours.

I think experienced CMs are used to all sorts of different baby needs, our CM comments how easy it is to put DD down because she needs the same thing every time and doesn't need rocking to sleep etc.

SarkySpanner · 22/06/2011 13:48

ask your CM what she would prefer.

joruth · 22/06/2011 13:49

Am mother of 4 and childminder. most childminders will try to preserve as much of a routine as pos but obviously this is easier the less complex it is. How about keeping it the same but putting the lullaby music next to the cot at the same time as giving his dummy and letting him fall asleep to it? Nearly the same but a bit more manageable for the CM. I think you could use the same one...just put it in his changing bag that goes with him to the minder...you wouldn't believe what some of my minded children bring with them!!!!

And yes you probably will wonder what you were worried about in a few weeks...but hey...you've probably got to worry about something as this is a big transition.

Best wishes

cece · 22/06/2011 14:44

My DC3 takes his lullaby machine thing with him to his CM for his nap time. Not weird at all to send it imo.

Original poster

SharkSkinThing · 22/06/2011 18:20

Hey MissHonkover!

Wonderful advice and support from everyone, thank you. I was going to wean him off the music but as it only plays for 5 minutes and is also quite useful if he is napping somewhere else, I would rather keep it. I guess it'll be quite nice for him to hear something familiar when he is elsewhere.

What I will do is change the milk to water and then lose it completely before he goes, so that it's as simple as possible for her to put him down.

And then I'll worry less. Ha!

OP posts:

MissHonkover · 22/06/2011 18:29

Oh no, you must definitely have something to worry about, what else would you do with your time?

smokesandmirrors · 22/06/2011 19:52

I think it's SUCH a natural concern...I've loosely gone back to work (at home, self-employed) at 6.5 months and even though I would be 'around,' I was really concerned about how much info to impart to the childcarer (who comes to me), and how much I should leave to her to design between her and my son. It made me utterly self-conscious which sounds stoopid - but then I thought, this is my son, these are the routines I know he likes - and I like him having - and essentially, without being too hard nosed, I'm paying this person to look after my son in the way that I want. As it happens, one month in, she's great, he's really happy and those worries are a faint memory...replaced of course, by all the other ones

girliefriend · 22/06/2011 19:56

When I went back to work I gave my dds cm a typed out copy of her routine!!! Omg I was pfb wasn't I?!!

It did however reassure me and meant my dd still had the continuity of a routine in place.

jubilee10 · 22/06/2011 20:22

I always put ds in his cot for his afternoon nap. He had a dummy and a muslin square. I used to put on his mobile and go through a little ritual before he went to sleep. When he started at the childminders she didn't have a cot and I was worried that his routine would be upset but she gave him his muslin square and put him in his pushchair (she didn't even use his dummy) and he had his nap quite happily. He developed two different routines - one for home and one for cm's. He happily did this for two years.

Original poster

SharkSkinThing · 22/06/2011 20:50

Thank the lord I'm not the only one who spends her time worried about this kind of stuff.

It's because, I think, my DS has only just started sleeping through the night (nods wearily at MissHonkover), and does 1.5 hours in the pm - for 9 months I was lucky if he did 20 minutes...

So I'm a bit wired about it all falling apart. And, of course, him being so desolate without me around that he won't sleep.

I really appreciate your advice everyone, thank you!

OP posts:

Cosmosis · 23/06/2011 13:17

girliefriend my CM asked me for a copy of my ds's routine, I'm sure that must be normal? They will want the child to settle in as quickly as possible surely?

Sharkskin I'm sure your DS will settle in well with his familiar routine so I would keep it going for him :)

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