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Behaviour/development

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Original poster

Can't get rid of dummy - HELP!!

19 replies

xxsaralouxxx · 29/05/2011 21:44

My 2.3 DS has had the dreaded dummy since he was born. I was always dead against them but he was what they termed a 'lazy baby' so was told to use one to encourage the sucking reflex, which worked but now I can't get the bloody thing off him!!! Have tried the dummy fairy, telling him he's too big and the babies need his 'nuk nuks' just simply saying no and encouraging a different comforter. He has always taken both a dummy (nuk nuk) and blanket (gaggle - his names not mine!) to bed but now it's constant and it's becoming a nightmare! He doesn't have either at nursery, not even to sleep but they are a constant feature at home. Any ideas gratefully recieved!!

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Lisatheonewhoeatsdrytoast · 29/05/2011 22:03

I wish i could help, my DS is 2.5 and i'm still struggling, he only has his at night to go to bed, but i cannot get it away from him, he was the same "lazy baby" and only weighted 4lb 10oz so they told me to encourage his sucking with a dummy and it worked a treat, not 2.5yrs later i can't get it off him at night, tho he doesn't use it at all during the day. HV told me it was just a comfort for him, and not to worry too much, try every so often to lose it and eventually he'll let it go??!

ballbreaker · 29/05/2011 22:15

We managed to wean the dummy off our 3 year old daughter over the course of a week by making a small hole in the tip of the dummy which we gradually made bigger day by day. By day 5 she told us she didn't want it anymore because it tasted horrible.
We did this along with stories of the new-born babies needing a dummy and the dummy fairy visiting (who left her a present the first night she went totally without the dummy).
To be honest it went very smoothly which we weren't expecting as she LOVED her dummy.
Hope this helps.

Original poster

xxsaralouxxx · 29/05/2011 22:15

God I hope so it's driving me crazy!! have been a bit worried it may be affecting his speech cos it's not very clear - when I spoke to a speech therapist she said to get rid of it but its easier said then done isn't it?! Glad it's not just me lol!

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Original poster

xxsaralouxxx · 29/05/2011 22:18

ballbreaker - have tried the whole dummy fairy thing (although we called it the nuk nuk fairy lol!) but he wasn't fooled! Haven't tried snipping a hole in itthough so I think I'll get the scissors out tomorrow - thanks!

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tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 29/05/2011 22:20

DS 3 has just given his up.....but kept the blanket! :)
He was REALLY attached so I know your fear.

We showed him a photo of a balance bike which he really wanted and told him the fairy's would give him a bike WHEN HE WAS READY TO GIVE THEM HIS DUMMIES.....that was key I think.

We mentioned it every few days, talked about it lots.

So then the day came, put them all in a pot, left them downstairs......he went to bed and cried for 2 hours :0 Thats was very hard!!

Woke up, delighted with the bike at the end of the bed and didn' mention the dummies again really.

It was so easy, I could not believe it as he was REALLY attached!!

Good luck!

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 29/05/2011 22:22

Don't do that to the dummy!! Major chocking hazzard I should think!

PacificDogwood · 29/05/2011 22:22

First off, DS1 was 4 and DS3 was 3 when we got rid of their dummies as I was not that bothered about them (DS2 was a dummy refuses and DS4 is 14 months and still in love with his ).

I told them about 3 days before the 'event' that the Dummy Fairy was coming, reminded them in the morning. At bed/nap time there was no dummy but a present (book) and fairy dust ! Neither one of them was upset, DS3 asked for his dummy the following night but simply had to be reminded that it was gone and that was that.
Unfortunately, getting rid of DS3's dummy also coincided with him then dropping his lovely 2-3 hours afternoon sleep, so maybe I should not have bothered when I did ...

If you choose to go down the Dummy Fairy route, you have to make sure you have no dummies lying around anywhere: if they find one, they'l have it. Interestingly DS3 never tried to pinch DS4's dummy .

IMO there is no rush to get rid of them, some kids are more 'sucky' than others. My DS2 never sucked anything: no thumb, no finger, no comfort object, no dummy. He also refused a bottle the youngest and wanted his milk in sippy cups.

Original poster

xxsaralouxxx · 29/05/2011 22:25

Think maybe I'm being a bit of a wimp! I've never left him to cry for very long without it so maybe I should be waiting longer and not give in so quick - I've never heard of a child being traumatised by no longer having a dummy lol!! Don't mind him keeping his blanket for now - that wont affect his speech!!

OP posts:

PacificDogwood · 29/05/2011 22:26

There was no crying involved with mine - I would agree, it all depends on them being ready and that will be different ages with different children.

tryingtobemarypoppins2 · 29/05/2011 22:27

I think keeping the blanket helped so good idea to keep it I think.
Really, the thought is worse than the reality....just be matter of fact about it.

Original poster

xxsaralouxxx · 29/05/2011 22:30

PacificDogwood - I love the idea of leaving fairydust with the present!! He doesn't suck his thumb or anything when he doesn't have it so I think it's just purely the fact that it's the dummy and hasn't had a bottle since he was about nine months cos he just wouldn't take it any more.
Time to bite the bullet I think !

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ballbreaker · 29/05/2011 22:32

Sorry propably should have mentioned that the hole in our daughter's dummy started as a pin-prick and ended up smaller than the size of a 5p peice so didn't pose a choking hazard.

Original poster

xxsaralouxxx · 29/05/2011 22:35

I can imagine that would work cos they wouldn't be able to get a proper suck on it!

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onelittleclara · 29/05/2011 22:55

With both DS1 and 2 we just went cold turkey and dealt with the fallout, both times over a period where both my and DH would be at home, so we could get take it in turns to deal with any issues. Both were 2 at the time. I think over complicating the issue with dummy fairies, posting to Santa etc can draw out the process. Neither times did we suffer for more than a couple of days, and we were were truly expecting the worst, especially with DS2 as he would never have it out of his mouth!

Original poster

xxsaralouxxx · 30/05/2011 08:19

Thanks for all your help guys! This morning I took away first thing and told him he was a big boy so didn't need his stinky nuk nuk!! He came downstairs quite happy, but I thought disaster had struck when he found one hidden in the bottom of his toy box! Expecting him to throw a complete wobbler I took it away explaining again that he's a big boy and he's not mentioned it since! Tonight will be the real test but I'll let u know how I get on xxx

OP posts:

fannybaws · 30/05/2011 11:13

I chopped the whole teat bit off after he had bitten a hole in it. It was attached to a teddy so he still took the handle bit and the teddy to bed for a while. Worked a treat and he was the same age and very much a dummy lover.
His speech and eating quadrupled in 48 hours, I wished I had done it much earlier.Hold firm OP .

nometime · 30/05/2011 11:18

Have you tried the dummy fairy leaving a little present in exchange for the dummy, worked for us, maybe worth a try if tonight is hard.

Good luck, and stick with it. Having had one dummy sucking ds and one thumb sucking ds the dummy was far easier to deal with and has had far less serious repercussions than the thumb sucking.

WillyBumBalls · 30/05/2011 11:20

My DS was almost 3 and would not give up no matter what I did so one morning he woke up I told him they were for babies and asked him to put themm in the bin which he did but come night time he wanted it back but I just reminded him what we had done and after 2 awful days he never asked again!

It was very stressful for me and possibly him too but in the end it was worth it.

Good Luck :)

psiloveyou · 30/05/2011 17:43

Several weeks before our holiday we told dd (2.9 at the time) that her dummies were not coming on holiday with us. We kept reminding her in the run up to the holiday and she was fine with it. On the first night she asked for her dummy. I reminded her that we had agreed she was a big girl now and as we had left the dummys at home she couldn't have one. That was that, she was fine.

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