Terrible twos??//

[stephi5]

Hi my little girl will be 2 in march-shes a fun loving independent funny girl. Not a cuddly girl either. She has started to become very forceful and is constantly refusing to do things always saying no!! If I tell her off she mimiks it and if i say no to something she'll just cry!! I have tried moving her out of the situation or taking things off her-but i dont think she understands??? is she too young??? I would love any ideas on what to do as i'm stuck! Her nursery have also said shes been mis behaving there too. Help needed!!!

It sounds harsh, but I think you need to make 'being told off' an unpleasant and upsetting experience for her.

If DS does something really naughty, I get down to his level, look at him with a serious expression, and explain loudly and forcefully (bellow in his face if he's not listening!) why he shouldn't do whatever it is he's doing. He will usually cry at this point, then go and sulk for a little while before apologising. I've only had to do this a few times and he's 2.8.

I have friends who use empty threats and the naughty step in a lighthearted, casual way. Their children seem to almost enjoy the process of being told off and so are deliberately naughty. The punishment has become a game and they have lost all control.

I think that you are doing fine. I don't think that a child can be too young to hear no- especially when they cOuld be compromising their safety.

As for the crying when being told off- that's normal because she's not getting her way and she thinks that the world should be centred around what she wants.

Stay consistent with rules and consequences and don't use too many words if you have to tell her off. Pick your battles and praise her for her good behaviour.

read a book called playful parenting by cohen. amazon sell it. it's about meeting your child emotioanal needs, bonding and overcoming problems though playfulness. Timeout can be effective used in the correct way - also holding can be effective too for different situations. Bellowing is no no in my eyes though - it doesn't seem very constructive.

hi I have a 2 year old and she is really going through the terrible twos. I feel overwhelmed and discouraged cause nothing works sometimes. I end up getting so angry and shouting at her, which makes me feel so guilty. I think to myself she's still so young and dont want to be too strict, but yet she really gives me a hard time especially when were out. Recently, she refuses to sit in her pram when I have to take my eldest to school and it makes us late and I try to force her in, but its physically impossible cause she has a major fit. I am desperate for any advice please.

I have the same problem with my DD who was 2 in April, it is definitely the Terrible Twos, and although they will experience these growing pains and rebellious streaks from now on until teenage years - this is just the beginning! - you have to think of each one as a phase. It does get better. I had a few weeks there, where everyday was a struggle.

It is natural to get frustrated and shout sometimes, and of course you will feel guilty afterwards. You just have to know that you are trying your best, you get pushed to your limit especially when you are busy and it seems like nothing is working. We don't always have the time to sit and let them have their tantrum, so sometimes there is no option but to lift them and make them do whatever it is you need them to do.
Just remember - they don't remember these angry times when we're shouting at them once in a blue moon, it is soon forgotten, and as long as you follow through and make sure they apologise, then it's all cuddles and kisses... until the next episode.

I don't think there is any easy way around these stages, I just try to remind myself she is going through growing pains, it's a natural stage of development, not her fault, not my fault, it just has to happen. If she didn't have tantrums and scream and kick when she didn't get her own way - then she wouldn't be a normal 2 year old.

I have a 2 year old and he definatley going through the terrible twos although he is usually a sweet kind hearted boy but is constantly playing up if he doesnt get his way. I usually get down to his level and sternly say no, but sometimes he is in such a temper he doesnt lisen and shouts at the top of his voice - i distract him till he calms down and explain to him what he did was wrong. There is no way round the terrible twos although not showing them you are angry and just keeping calm usually helps. Good luck! x :)