What Jobs/chores do you expect your 10 year old to do?

[Wills]

I have four children, the eldest of which is 10. Being the oldest its been difficult to understand what things she should be able to do for herself and what I should be still doing for her. Occupational Therapy want us to stop molly coddling her and get her to become more indepedent. Being a mum of four children I think this is a fantastic idea. For instance, not only is she terrible at remembering to brush her teeth she'd really rather I still did it for her, whereas her 7 year old sister would be mortified if I offered to brush her teeth. Should I be able to expect her each morning to find her own school uniform instead of laying it out for hear each night. Should I physically make sure her homework's (on the rare occassion we can get her to do it) is actually in her bag or leave her to it. Should I make her breakfast or again leave her to it - just over see what she's doing? What does your 10 year old do?

My dd who is eleven is expected to do the following without being told:

Have a thorough wash first thing in the morning, make her bed, pick up anything chucked on the floor including clothes. She often makes herself breakfast, not always this includes poached eggs on toast (Lakeland egg poachers). Then she gets dressed - I merely provide the clothes washed and ironed, she puts them away/gets them out etc. She's also responsible for feeding guinea pigs before school. Brushes teeth, gets school bag together and off she goes.

After school she does music practise while I'm cooking supper, homework after supper. She also must have a quick wash before bed and obviously do her teeth.

In addition she's expected to keep her room tidy, put away clothes, change bedding once a week and clean guinea pig hutch weekly.

In return she gets £3 per week pocket money and £10 top up on her phone.

She does most of it without reminding with the exception of her room, which I have to nag a lot about.

I would say that packing a 10 year old's bag and laying out uniform is very ott and not good for her in the long rung. At this age she needs to feel confident in her own abilities. I don't do this for my 7 year old.

Phone top up is monthly btw.

Why does she have an OT ?

My dd does her own breakfast, puts laundry in the hamper, cleans out pets does homwork/music practice without help. She takes plates out helps cook supper and puts away clean clothing. She organises her own baths etc. She wouldn't have tome to help with much more at the moment she is rarely just hanging around with nothing to do.

Ds is 10th and has asd. He brushes his own teeth and makes his own breakfast, though it is only cereal.
He tidies his own room, hangs his washing up once done, brings dirty laundry down.
He will tidy toys from the front room, rinse tea cups, even run a Hoover around if I ask.

At 10 she should be encouraged to be more independant and should be taking responsibility for her self.

Why does she need OT?

If OT thinks so, too, TBH she does sound mollycoddled, won't she be in secondary school next year? She ought to lay out her own clothes, get own bag sorted the night before and be able to help herself to a simple breakfast.

I try not to even do too much reminding now for my 10 year old on these things, she is more concerned about getting told off at school-I am just background noise

Her room is a tip , but I only insist she goes to school on time -big row today over warm clothes-even that looks impossible at secondary, I see they go in wearing nothing warm regardless of the weather.

My 10yr old DD does the following -

Has a wash without being reminded morning and evening, clean teeth.
She does the drying up after I have washed up
and puts it away.
She sorts out the clean washing into mine and her piles and puts her own clothes away.
She looks after her rabbit and cleans the hutch out
She hoovers once a week usually on a Saturday.
She gets £5 per week pocket money

OH MY GOD - Wow. Right (mentally rolling up sleeves with determined look on face).

By the way she had gone to OT cos she's aspergic - which is why QueenGigantour's post was particularly poignent (important)

Mine has ASD as well. Good luck

My twin sister and I had the following chores from the age of 10:

Making beds
Cooking family dinner
Washing, drying dishes
Folding and putting away laundry
Cleaning bathroom once a week
Feeding / cleaning out ducks and goats
Looking after younger sister
Polishing living-room furniture
Splitting firewood and bringing into the house
Lighting fire

I think your DD should at least be able to care for herself. Responsibility is a good thing to teach a child. We didn't get any pocket money but I always thought this was really unfair!

Our DD is 9.7 and pretty much does nothing. She will load the dishwasher and help me unload it. She can't reach the cupboards so can't put anything away.
She is responsible for bathing and washing her own hair and doing her homework. If she gets into trouble at school because it isn't done, it is her own fault.
She can make me coffee (machine) but I wouldn't trust her with boiling water. She dislikes hoovering but loves mopping. She doesn't get pocket money.

Ds has a disability which makes regular chores difficult. However, I do expect him to sort his own breakfast, if he is well I sometimes ask him to run down the shops for me if I've forgotten something, he makes me cups of tea, he looks after his own hygiene and hair and one day he may get round to tidying up his room.

I confess to laying out uniform but this is because ds is often in pain in the mornings and unable to move very well- and it will stop when he goes to secondary.

My ds who is 9.3 will get up, get washed, brush his teeth, get dressed, make his breakfast, load the dishes in the dishwasher, pack up his bag and generally be ready for school. After school he does his homework/guitar practice and packs everything back where it should be. He showers and washes his own hair. He also keeps his room tidy, feeds the dog on occasion, will hoover if asked and helps keep the house tidy. Under supervision he can cook and make cups of tea. He also goes in the shop with a list and gets groceries whilst I stand outside with the dog. I think at 10 most children should be able to manage this.

Oh and he gets £5 per week pocket money