Double Barelled Names

[GinaFB]

My DP and I have discussed the possibility of a double barelled surname combining both our names for DC #1.

Has anyone else done this and if so what was the procedure? Can we just specify this on the Birth Cert?

Thanks for your imput!

If it sounds ok then double barrel.

Very common amongst unmarried parents in my neck of the woods.

i have a different surname from my children as they have my surname as their middle name and his as a surname.

I have never encountered any problems. no one have ever questioned my relationship to them. how very strange......

schools doctors etc tend to just call you Mrs your kids surname. I would correct them if it bothered me but its no big deal

DS loves having a hyphenated surname, one from me one from DP.
We didn't give him a middle name, after that - it seemed superfluous.

I had a double-barrelled name and it is incredibly tedious to live with. In fact, despite being a bit of a feminist I gladly took on DH's single surname and dumped the double-bareelled name. Why?

Well, no-one ever filed my records correctly so I had to get used to waiting patiently while receptionists looked under both letters of my surname. So irritating when it happens all the time.

Then there is the colleague or teacher who decide to drop one half of the surname leaving me oblivious to my name being called out. Oh, and the "friends" who snigger at the pretentiousness of the double-barrelling.

Then there is utter uselessness of those little boxes on CRB forms and the like where I used to run out of space for my silly surname and first and middle name.

Parents, don't DO IT to your kids. They won't thank you for it. It really is a pain in the arse.

Well, that's your experience llareggub but it won't hold true for everyone. I've a few friends with double barrelled names who seem perfectly happy about it.

"But whether or not the relationship works out, the child is still the child of the ex, still carries his DNA -- why not acknowledge this and honour the fact that the child is part you and part someone else, genetically?"

Absolutely martha, these were my sentiments as well. Whatever happens between DP and I in the future, DS will always be his son and I would not wish to withdraw that from him, either in practice or by name. I suppose my colleagues were assuming that, should things sour, my son bearing my ex's surname and not mine would bother me and I'd regret it but legally be unable to change it (apart from by Deed Poll).

I agree with squishbelle where does it end? So your dd double barrell marries someone elses ds double barrell and ends up with little Sarah Smith Brown Green Harvey - crazy.

Think you should listen to llgrub who posted her actual experiences of being double barrelled. Seems to me it makes the parents feel better and is all about them negotiating their relationship but the poor child has to actually live with the consequences.

KERALA1, how many people have you actually met with four last names?

" What will happen when the double-barrellers have children of their own - quadruple barrelling? Why dont people just choose one name and be done with it?"
Like in Spain one of the name get dropped for each name (usually the women's side). Or you can choose only one of the name, if you don't like it.
I think it avoids the tedious task of dealing with hundreds of John Smith.....
When we had DD we weren't married so both names were needed for passeport reasons (you have trouble travelling with a child who has a different name, in many countries) and the registrar didn't even asked she assumed it will be both name as both parents were present.
We come from different counties so when we are in one country I use the name from which it originates making life easier
Plus it makes my dad happy that is name won't be dropped as he only has grand-daughters. I don't mind being called mrs X or Y or X-Y and I don't my DDs will either.

Cyteen - the problem of four names isnt quite yet upon us so Kerala probably hasnt heard of anyone yet. This double-barrelling seems to be a relatively recent thing which has coincided with the declining popularity of marriage. The double barrellers probably arent yet of an age to have their own children. What will they do when they are?

As I said before, maybe we should ask the aristocracy who seem to have been double barrelling quite happily for years without things getting too out of hand.

Cyteen, the aristos have certainly been multiple barrelling for centuries, but they do end up with ridiculous names - the first Duke of Buckingham and Chandos's family surname was Temple-Nugent-Brydges-Chandos-Grenville.

And don't get me started on the Tollemache-Tollemache family!

Ahem actually I have. I know a family where dad was double barrelled so they added mums name on as well. So the children are triple barrelled.

Also the toffs are no advert for this. Annabella Gough-Calthorpe-Anstruther something or other in the copy of Hello I was reading in the hairdressers. Sorry but I think its all ridiculous. You did ask.

Both my dh and I adopted double-barrelled name when we married. I liked my surname. I like my new surname even more - it gives us each a connection to the other's culture.

No one thinks it is pretentious as (to Brit ears) the first part sounds so outlandish that it can only be because my husband is from somewhere else.

It will give our (fingers crossed) future dcs a link to both cultures too. When they get married, well, they'll be adults and can do what they like. I'm not precious about it

I guess if it's just two names it's fine. I always remember a girl who had been through parent divorce, then both parent remarriages and had ended up with four surnames (double barrelled at birth, mum insisted on new DH's name when she married him and Dad didn't think is was 'fair' on his new DP so she got lumped with all four). Her surname had nine syllables all included, and none of them were typical or common names.
Think carefully before you set a precedent!