Calling daughter husband's Ex's name?

[MaryBeardsBeard]

Nearing the end of my pregnancy and don't know the baby's sex

Have a couple of nice options for boys but really stumped for girls names that we agree on!

There is one girl's name we both like but it happens to be the name of my husband's significant ex.
It's a very common timeless name (think like Charlotte or Emma) so it isn't closely associated with her but his family and close friends will be aware of the link

If it makes a difference, they were together a few years long distance but didn't live together, ended amicably due to different goals in life. They stayed friends initially (I've met her a couple of times) but have gradually stopped and are no longer in contact beyond the odd birthday card etc

I personally am not bothered by the association at all, but will other people think it's weird?
Should we ask her "permission"?

It is weird. And anyone associated with DH will think you named her after his ex. I wouldn't do it personally.

If it’s a super commonly used name then I wouldn’t bother asking her. If she’s odd about it just claim it’s after a childhood friend or a favourite character or you always planned to call your daughter that from childhood and it’s a co incidence! It’s not like you see her lots or anything.

You don’t need to ask her permission, but I wouldn’t do it. i’d wonder if every time your called your dd’s name, whether dh would be thinking of ex. Also, would ex attach more significance to the fact you named your dc after her (even if you didn’t).

I mean.. I think it’s unlikely anyone would think the OP had named her child after her husbands ex.

If it doesn’t bother you OP then it’s fine, given it’s a common name no one is going to think much about it. The world is full of Lucys or whatever.

its a mad idea! I assume your hormones are clouding your sense.

Of course you don't need her permission.

There are millions if girls names, using your DH's ex's is batshit.

I think it’s weird personally. You definitely shouldn’t ask permission- that makes it sound like you are naming baby after her.

Of all the possible names, I'm not sure why you'd choose that one. Choose another.

You absolutely do not need to ask her permission, it's not solely her name.

I would advise against using it though. It's weird and anyone who knew of her and your DH will think its weird too.

Should we ask her "permission"?

Oh fuck no, that would make you look very weird!!

Could you call her a shorter or longer version of the name if you like it ? Charlie instead of Charlotte , Emily instead of Emma , type of name . It does seem a bit weird to call your baby the same actual name .

Beyond weird. There are thousands of other names. Pick one of those..

Very weird, there are hundreds of beautiful baby girl names, picking the same name as your DH’s ex is very odd.

You don’t have to ask permission but there will be people wondering if you know it’s ex’s name and/ot think that your h is hung up on her. Is there a similar name or shortening you can use like Katie for Kitty?

I wouldn't fancy it personally but it's completely up to you. I definitely wouldn't be asking her permission though, you're not actually naming your child after her because that would be seriously weird 😂

We had this situation as well OP - except it was an old, much briefer ex of mine. The association didn't bother me at all - and DH couldn't have cared less - but we ultimately didn't go for it as it would have raised a few eyebrows in my friendship circle, and I just didn't want that.

I still sometimes wish we'd done it though, it's a great name! But in the end a name is with them all their life, so if it raises eyebrows or causes even a bit of a ruffle maybe it's best not?

You might not think it odd, but all his friends & family certainly will.

Also just imagine the ex seeing Facebook post from him showing off Baby "Emma", she will then be straight in his DM's asking if this is because he still has feelings for her. Next thing you husband & ex are having an affair. 😉

I’m sorry but NO.

There are thousands of beautiful names. Avoid your husband’s ex partner’s name. It will make people on his side uncomfortable. It can’t be that nice!!

Also you associate names with people so the fact your husband likes the name of his ex is giving …

I would under no circumstances name someone after an ex. That just seems bizarre and wrong. No name could be that worth having.

The fact you are asking MN shows you have doubts, so don’t do it. There are thousands of suggestions online for baby names, narrow them down to a few then decide. Good luck x

You can call your baby any name you want to, in no way is it strange a name is for everyone not just one particular person, so rest assured your baby may have the same name as someone you know, but your baby will be its own person growing up , so dont even give it a second thought, enjoy the rest of your pregnancy & a very big good luck for when your new precious bundle arrives

I have the same name as one of my dad’s exes. My mum didn’t know at the time, otherwise she would never have agreed to it. I still feel weirded out and annoyed by the whole thing. Don’t do it, it’s weird.

No way, there's a name I always really liked, but is the name of husbands ex so there's no way I would use it (and we've all had dinner together, so no bad feelings!). But it would have been bizarre to use the name

Very odd to even thinking of ‘asking her permission’ I really think you need to have a look at other names.

Your dad went out with a girl called Cadburyegg?