Help me, I have baby name regret

[Lostandanxious]

Can you help me please?
I have baby name regret. I have named my baby ruby and the other name i had in mind was kate which I now think I should have gone with. We gave her the middle name kate in case she would like to use it down the line, but sure why did we even have that thinking which makes me think we made the wrong choice? We have registered her name and I am certain it can't be changed in ireland once registered as its the first name. She is 7 weeks and we have received gifts with her name on, and basically everyone knows her name now and would come across so weird and unusal of me to cha ge it. My partner is happy with the name. Should I just change it and deal with the weirdness now or just try get over my anxiety about this???

If your partner is happy to, try calling her Kate for 2 weeks, if it lands then switch over.

1st question is can it get changed in Ireland?

if the answer is yes, then I would 100% change it, she’s 7 weeks not 7.

I don't know how these things work in Ireland and changing names but just wanted to say Ruby is a beautiful name, but if you want to call her Kate just call her by her middle name, people have done this forever (been known as their middle name)

Call her Ruby Kate. It’s lovely.

He won't even entertain it. I tried discussing it at 2 weeks old. And he said her name is her name.

Only the surname can be changed

I think it's normal to be worried if you picked the right name because it's such a big thing - is it possible you would feel the same way if you had registered the names the other way around?

For what it's worth, I think Ruby is such a lovely name

I know how bad baby name regret can make you feel, because I've been there. If you can't change it legally, I would just keep it as is. I know it never helps to hear, but Ruby Kate is lovely. She can still choose whether to use Ruby or Kate. Plenty of people use their middle name as a forename! I know a few who do.

Ruby is such a lovely name - I would stick with it personally and she will grow into it. Kate is nice but I know a million adult Kates, so Ruby feels more modern (I know it’s past its peak use but it’s a fairly modern-sounding classic that’s stood the test of time and less overused in the general population than Kate).

I love the name Ruby.

Ruby Is nicer than Kate.
if your partner doesn’t want to consider changing it you’re going to have to accept it as it is her name and has been for 7 weeks

Ruby is a lovely name!

Ruby is MUCHH nicer!!

Ruby Kate is a beautiful name

If it can’t be changed on the BC in Ireland and your DH is refusing anyway then hard as it is I think you need to let it go.

Try to think of the positives-

A) you’ve given her a middle name you do love in Kate and she can easily go by it if she chooses to (lots of people call themselves by their middle names when older, it’s still part of your name after all)

B) the first name you have given her is popular -meaning lots like the sound of Ruby, her name will fit in with her peers, she can get fun stuff with her name on in shops etc

C) but at number 30 in Ireland currently Ruby is not so popular that there would likely be loads of them at school

D) it’s easy to pronounce and spell and should cause her absolutely no difficulties in life.

Ruby may not be to everyone’s taste but you could have done far worse for her than choosing a popular name with lots of benefits and which many people do like- please don’t beat yourself up for it.

Ruby is a great name!

I had the same experience with all 3 of my kids but it wore off each time and now I couldn't imagine them with any other names. It feels like such a big decision, choosing a name and it's so final when you do. They grow into their names. Things settle down and it starts to feel right.

Ruby is such a beautiful name.

I don't normally like double names like Sarah Jane, etc, but Ruby Kate is cute - has a nice ring to it.

Ruby Kate is lovely. No one can argue with you using both names if you want to.

Ruby is a lovely name OP! Really really lovely.

Ruby was my great great grandmother’s name. I thought it was so cool! There are millions of people called Kate.

It’s hard when they’re so tiny, you think of all the names beforehand and it’s different when they are born. It took me a while to get used to our children’s names, but now I can’t imagine them being called anything else!

Hey OP ..
I am also Irish , when I saw you use the word sure , pronounced shur 😂, I knew you were Irish also 🙌 …
So my friend was named Catherine Joyce , her mother preferred Joyce after, eventhough she was registered Catherine Joyce & just went ahead & called her Joyce & that’s what she is known as Joyce !
Your baby is only 7 weeks old , just go ahead & call her Kate & everybody will be use of it in no time ! Not a big deal to tell your friends & family, they’re your friends & family afterall 😊 ..
Don’t stress it OP ..
Congratulations on your new baby girl 🎈X

I much prefer Ruby to Kate. You’ve made the right choice.

What helped me @Lostandanxious as odd as it sounds was going to facebook and searching the name you are unsure of in people. Seeing lots of cool confident women who totally rock the name. It's hard to imagine on her yet as she's so young, but imagine the feisty twenty something she will be!

OP, if your partner is happy and everyone knows your baby as Ruby, then that’s her name. I think Ruby Kate is sweet - and it’s very easy to overthink things such as names, especially in the early weeks. Don’t upset your DH and go through the trauma of telling everyone that you’ve changed her name. I think definitely get over the anxiety - she will be a Ruby, and I bet she’s a little love!