Maiden name as a first name?

[HashB]

We have really struggled with names for boys. Hayes is my maiden name and will ‘die out’ this generation as we’re a family of girls and no one kept it. Would it be strange as a first name or is it better saved for middle?

what’s the point of being so nasty?

I assume OP has already changed her name. She’s hardly likely to change it back now.

(I kept my birth surname and would prefer if women did in general, but I’m not nasty about it!)

My point was she didn’t ask for a lecture from you or anyone else on her choice.
No one “reigns supreme” in my world and I’ve more important things to get exercised about than names. It’s interesting how it’s often the name-warriors who are least feminist in other aspects of life.

She commented that she was sad her family’s name would die out in the very first post. So pointing out that it actually doesn’t have to isn’t “nasty”.

It’s clearly a complete coincidence that in 90+% of cases where one of the partners changes their name it’s the woman, even if that risks her family name dying out. No possible other reason why it seems to be this way AT ALL.

(in what way am I not feminist?!)

It’s not awful bit agree with those saying if you didn’t like it enough to keep as a surname why then decide to give it to your child. I think it’s sad you wouldn’t be giving your child a name you love but instead a name that wasn’t good enough for you to keep but you think is fine to pull out of the reject bin for your child.

You seem to have difficulty with basic comprehension so maybe this will help!

1. You didn't "point it out", you said "Why on earth women are changing their names in this day and age is beyond me." That's your negative opinion on her choice, and not related to her query.
2. Nowhere did I comment on whether or not you are a feminist.

@Itsaloadofbollocksbut I assume that OP is aware and f her choices and doesn't need you to point out the bloody obvious

Go away and stop derailing the thread! It's boring.

Beautiful first name OP, love it!

It is the name of a not very glam area in Ealing so if you ever go to west London I wouldn't have it as a first name, but good middle name

Also agree with using your surname as the child's name

Reject bin !?

Dramatic much....

On my Dad's side of the family it was the custom to have the mother's maiden name as a middle name for one child male or female - names like Watson and Orkney. It seems to have died out with his generation (b 1925).

Or pay tribute to it with Hayden or something like that as a first name? I think Hayes is a fab middle name.

Hayes is a very common surname here in Ireland. I think it works very well as a first name.

Any surname thread always go the same way. It’s boring.

Frankly an odd choice you are contemplating. You gave up your surname but want to keep it in the family by giving it to your son as a first name. Why can’t he have it as a surname?

ha best response yet! And my sentiments exactly.

Hayes sounds a bit like a butlers name in a period drama.

I'd use it as a middle name tho

Sounds like Haze. Look up hazing, it's not nice.

I am willing to bet that some people will spell it Haye's.

I like it. There are plenty of surnames that would be awful as a first name, but Hayes is actually pretty good. If you're struggling with find a name that you like and you like this one then go for it. Don't mention it to people, just introduce him with his name when he arrives and everyone will fall in love with baby Hayes and his name.

I think it works well as a boy's first name!

I like it. My ds has my maiden name as his middle name. I saw it as a way of honouring my side of the family in much the same way as we had chosen to use a family name from DH side for dc1.

Nobody would spell it Haye’s.

Hay's, Hays, Haze.

Yes they will. Many people cannot spell, many people are poorly educated and think apostrophes are 'too hard to understand' so bang them in anywhere there's an s. Most people make lazy assumptions.

All names are mis-spelt sometimes. Unusual ones far more than others.

I agree with @lottiegarbanzo

See, for example, this, which has no business having an apostrophe.

I did this. However it was an easier decision as it is a more recognised name. (Along the lines of Cole, Harper etc).
Hayes is definitely more unusual but I think it works as a first name OK if you want to. But if you prefer another name I'd do that and put it as middle.

My cousin also has my maiden name as a middle, as when he was born there were no boys in the family to 'carry on the surname'. And then 2 boys were born to uncles so it continued anyway.