Everyone pronounces our daughter's name wrong

[StarShine23]

Hi all, advice needed please.

We named our daughter after someone we know from abroad. Its a pretty simple name but we had never heard it in the UK before. Baby is now 1 and the name has become more popular here, but it has a different pronunciation than we use. The problem we have is we don't like way its pronounced here, but everyone we meet now calls her by the UK version rather than her name, even though we correct them.

Do we:
(a) stick to our original pronunciation, even though it will be a battle for her growing up when other people with the same name all pronounce it the UK way
(b) accept the UK version, even though we dont like it and to us, doesn't suit her
(c) change her name

Has anyone else been through this? What did you do / wish you had done?

We feel awful that we have unwillingly picked something that is going to be tricky for her now all her life, but we love the name.

It has been insightful to find out that after well over 40 years I have been saying my own name wrong thanks to a bright spark on MN 🙄

Anyway back in the real world where I know my name is correct FOR ME, I will correct people if they do say the other pronunciation but to be honest most people ask when they first meet me as both versions are common these days

It’s like the name Gill some people pronounce with a g for giraffe and some with a g for get.

If you had a foreign name you wouldn’t let people pronounce it their own way as that’s not the name you had chosen for you.

My guess is Mila, as it is very popular at the moment, and I know one that is pronounced Meela. It is a shame you didn't realise this before she was 1, as it would have been really easy for you to change her birth certificate name, but 1 is the cut off point. Does she have a middle name you like as much? Or can you change the spelling to reflect how you want it pronounced?

Manon?

My son's name is Rajan, which in India is pronounced with the accent on the first syllable, but here in the US people tend to accent the second syllable. My husband has an Asian name that ends in a vowel, so he is always being mistaken for a woman. I have a Scandinavian name that ends in a consonant, so it is often assumed I am a man. Furthermore my name is unpronounceable even by me. We just use these things as conversation starters. Not a big deal at all. We certainly would not be changing anyone's name! If you like the name you have chosen, I'd stick with it.

Someone said Mila which fits with the middle vowel difference though I’m guessing if it’s this OP says Meela not Mila.

I have friends who named their DD Alicia, and pronounce it Alissia rather than Aleesha - that’s been a bit tricky for them, and they’ve had to correct quite a few people over the years.

Im not sure which one is considered the proper pronunciation!

Thank you!

Ghee is the French pronunciation of Guy. There was a thread a few weeks back where someone maintained they met a guy called Guy but it was pronounced Gooey. I’m sure he probably said Ghee with a French accent. No one is called Goooey surely…

I would just keep correcting. My son has a name that is can be pronounced in a few ways depending on the language and we chose the French version as he's half French and it works better for our family.

It's slightly irritating in the UK to have to always specify the pronunciation but people catch on quickly.

I understand your dilemma because I dislike the English pronunciation of his name but in a way it made it easier as I was crystal clear I didn't want him to be known by that version of the name.

Friends wanted to call their daughter Ava but pronounce it Eva. Luckily enough people persuaded them that for the sake of losing an A they would be saving their child a life time of grief.

Honestly OP, it's not a big deal. People who know her will pronounce her name correctly. She can decide herself later on, if she wants to be bothered to correct occasional baristas, receptionists etc. There are many names that are pronounced in different ways. If you love the name, as you pronounce it, that's all that matters.

I'd correct people. I know an Anastasia, pronounced An-uh-stah-sia rather than An-uh-stay-sia. Neither is "wrong" but the first is the way her name is pronounced.

My husband is called Evan. Not a particularly unusual name and only one way to pronounce it. Yet he's frequently called Ivan, Ewen or even Even! None of those are his name so people are quite rightly corrected 😄

We have similar with my daughter's name. She's Naomi. We pronounce it Nay Oh me with the emphasis on the o. We introduce her as that and still get people immediately responding hello Nie oh me or nay yumee. I don't understand why they do that when we literally just said her name to them.

So do I 😂 but it’s annoying!! 😂😂

Are you sure you're pronouncing it correctly? I knew someone whose name was quite widely used, but her parents kind of made up their own pronunciation of it and got annoyed when others used the more usual (correct) one. It was the equivalent of calling a child Anne and telling others they should pronounce it as Ay-nay.

Eva pronounced Ava I’ve heard many times depending on nationality, but never Ava pronounced Eva!

I too have an (unusual) name which people generally mispronounce - it doesn't bother me at all. In fact it slightly takes me by surprise when I hear it pronounced correctly! (by people who have taken the trouble to get it right). But I'm used to responding to either version - no problem.

I thought the correct pronunciation of Xavier was Hav-ee-ay?

My daughter has a name that is not local to us, and we pronounce it closer to the "non-local" way. Most people here don't know it, and pronounce it a little differently - I don't like the way it sounds.

I've realized though a lot of people can't really hear the difference, so even if you correct them they don't "get" it.

I don't generally correct people now. We say it the way we like it, and other people say it that way. I don't think it's an unusual situation actually.

Leila is a good example of this.
It’s either
Lay-La or Lee-luh

either way is fine and up to the person. No one can tell by reading it how to pronounce it and it’s down to the individual - doesn’t bother me, I love my name! 😃

I'm wondering if it's Anais, though I know you don't want to say.
It's beautiful pronounced the Greek way.
Not so much in English 🤐

How do you pronounce Anais two different ways? I only know one way.

You knew you were using an unusual name that might get mispronounced. You now have to choose whether to accept the usual pronunciation or keep correcting people. Neither is right or wrong and at some point it will be up to your daughter.

I know three Maya's. All three pronounce their names differently (May-a, My-a and May) and I can never, for the life of me, remember which is which.