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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Same name as cousin

70 replies

Clear235 · 21/05/2021 12:54

Would this bother you? Live around 10 mins from each other, will not attend the same school or see each other more than once a week.
It is a family name for me, partner did not agree for DD1 but has agreed for DD2 after realising what the name means to my family, the babies will have different surnames.

OP posts:

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JemimaTiggywinkle · 21/05/2021 12:56

Yes it would definitely bother me

Iamblossom · 21/05/2021 13:01

yep. choose something else 100%

Maskedrevenger · 21/05/2021 13:03

Your DH might understand why this name is important to you and why you want to use it, I would think anyone else would think it odd especially the cousin’s parents. It would be very confusing for other members of the family e.g grandparents to have 2 grandchildren similar in age called the same name

Original poster

Clear235 · 21/05/2021 13:03

When I say the same name one will have the formal name ie, Charlotte and one will be Charlie

OP posts:

popcorndiva · 21/05/2021 13:03

Yeah I wouldn't give the same name to my DC as one of their cousins. Far too close a link and of the same generation.

lunar1 · 21/05/2021 13:03

Pick something else!

DotDotDotDotDot · 21/05/2021 13:31

Yes honestly I would find this very strange. Grandparents would have 2 grandchildren with the same name??

Inafastspin · 21/05/2021 13:32

How old is the cousin? Could you discuss it with her parents?

Original poster

Clear235 · 21/05/2021 13:33

We have discussed and always said if we had another DD that would be her name so they was aware and still picked. Now DD is on way

OP posts:

Gladimnotcampinginthisweather · 21/05/2021 13:35

My sister has the same name as one of our cousins. Nobody seemed to mind, in fact I think the cousin rather liked it. We did have to come up with a way to differentiate between them though.

EileenGC · 21/05/2021 13:35

@Clear235

When I say the same name one will have the formal name ie, Charlotte and one will be Charlie

I think that’d be okay. Exactly same name - I wouldn’t do it, and I only see my cousins every 3-4 years. Would still be a bit strange to share a name.

Chickybumbum · 21/05/2021 13:38

I have cousins with the same name. Its never been an issue

ILoveShula · 21/05/2021 13:39

Is it your/DH's sibling's child's name?

If it's a cousin's child's name then you could use it., If the name is something very popular anyway, fine but if it's unusual, then you'll be seen to be copying.

Several of my cousins have used names that had already been used by their cousins but the children were not close in age.

The only one that was commented on were two 2nd cousins born within months of each other, and the fist name wasn't particularly popular or a 'family' name. The second cousins had a different middle name and surname but were the only two in their school year.

Twizbe · 21/05/2021 13:39

Nope, wouldn't bother me.

I have used a family name for my son. I'd have no issue with my brother or cousins also using the name. I don't own it and they have just as much right to use it as I do.

Overdueanamechange · 21/05/2021 13:40

My son and my cousin's son share the same name. Its no big deal.

FelicityPike · 21/05/2021 13:40

I have 3 cousins with the same name. First and Second! It’s a family name, but no, I couldn’t/ wouldn’t do it.

SleepingStandingUp · 21/05/2021 13:41

Op didn't you post this the other day? I think you just need to be forthright and tell your brother why you're using it for DD but that you won't use the diminutive they've named their DD

dinosaurtin · 21/05/2021 13:47

I have cousins with the same names and they have children with the same names. It doesn’t bother anyone, least of all the people who had the same name and then did the same to their own children. It is easy to know who is being spoken about because it is obvious in the wider conversation. Have a lovely time with your new baby.

GreyhoundG1rl · 21/05/2021 13:50

I really wouldn't. You don't know they'll only see each other once a week. Or not end up at the same school.

brushlaptop · 21/05/2021 13:54

Personally I wouldn't. I think what I would be most annoyed about was if this name had specific meaning to you personally and they knew that but used it for their daughter anyway. Once they have used it though I think it would be strange to use it yourselves. But it's your child so if you would not find it strange go ahead!

Marcipex · 21/05/2021 13:58

I think it’s totally a non-issue , especially if one is known by the shortened version.
I’d only say perhaps not, if they were going to be in the same class at school.

EssentialHummus · 21/05/2021 14:00

We nearly did this, with 2DC a year apart living in different countries. I'm glad we didn't. At the time I felt it'd be fine, now (4 years on) I think it would make for a really odd family Whatsapp group - "Oh look how big Sophia's gotten!" "Yes, she's at school now. How's your Sophia?" etc.

If you feel very strongly about the name the sky won't fall in over this, but it's a bit unusual.

Iwantcauliflowercheese · 21/05/2021 14:02

My cousin has 2/3 of my DC's names for hers. It's not a problem for any of us.

Ceara · 21/05/2021 14:09

I'm not sure I would. But on the other hand my dad had two first cousins who both shared a name - they were each named after their late uncle who'd been killed in WW2 - and it never seemed to be an issue so maybe those of us who'd hesitate are overthinking it.

M0rT · 21/05/2021 14:11

Go for it, I have loads of people with the same name in my family.
Sometimes because it's a family name in my family and sometimes because someone's spouse has a family name that happens to be the same as a new name to my family.
We just use surnames or nicknames to differentiate. It's usually fairly clear who is meant anyway in context.

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