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Long rant - can't pick boy name

65 replies

SisterCellophane · 23/05/2020 17:22

Hi, can anyone help me and my boyfriend name our baby? I just found out yesterday that it's a boy and we can't seem to agree on any names. My favourites are Tom (Thomas on bc), Jack, Harry, Sean, Sam(uel on bc), Daniel, Matthew...all shut down instantly as were the second tier choices Oliver, Charlie, Peter, Joseph, Michael and Callum. He knows/knew someone called Jack he doesn't like, he says Sean and Callum are "chavvy"(!), Harry is vetoed because it's a pet he had/because of Harry Potter...the rest he just says are too boring, or he just doesn't like them.
He's also blanket-vetoed anything featuted in the Bible, which I don't really follow as this is most normal names and I don't think it implies you're religious to use one?
The problem is, I only seem to LIKE "boring" names. I grew up with probably a top-5 name for the year and it wasn't that bad, I always knew a couple of other people with the same name and...so what??? Everyone develops their own individual personality, so I don't actually think anyone needs to have individuality thrust on them. I also really don't want a name that's pretentious or people will have preconceptions about, and I feel like the best way to avoid preconceptions is to have a name that's quite common? Like surely the fact people know 5 Toms or Matts mean they're less likely to have a set picture of what someone with that name is like.
Boyfriend also says he wants a name that "looks good on a CV", which is surely these generic white guy type of names, or else picking an overtly "posh" name, which I don't want to do because we're a modest middle-income couple and I feel like it just looks stupid/try-hard if our son has a name like Tarquin when he'll be going to state schools and living in a 2-bed flat etc (also my family would absolutely rip the piss out of me...)
We're English living in London. Extended family in the North East (Newcastle area/County Durham) and South Wales (no Welsh heritage ethnically, all Welsh names vetoed. Of Irish heritage. Would use Irish names (in fact boyfriend said he liked them so I built hopes around "Sean" which were then sunk) but nothing difficult for English speakers to pronounce (don't mind a counter-intuitive spelling as any Irish-language derived name will have one, just want to be able to spell it).
Boyfriend doesn't really have any suggestions. We looked through the popular baby names and he liked Arlo, which I initially shot down. Now I think it's growing on me? But I'm not convinced. I've never heard this name before and it doesn't have a clear origin, so it doesn't feel like a proper name to me? Also it's just come up out of nowhere which to me comes off like it's kind of a fad/tacky/will date badly, and I'm generally not keen on "O" endings.
TL;DR I have three questions:
1.) Is there a name I'm overlooking that we might both like? (Names we like but can't use for personal reasons are Conor, Rory and Laurie)
2.) There are three names we both deemed "acceptable" although I think that's as warm as it gets and I like but don't love - Fred(erick on bc...), George and Alfred (bc only would be Alfie or Fred IRL). How do you rate these? All likely to enrage my older relatives with their overt Englishness but they emigrated here so they can suck it up.
3.) Can you convince me on Arlo, or even better, convince my boyfriend on Tom/Jack/Harry/Sean? Or are these names terrible?

OP posts:
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Audreyhelp · 23/05/2020 17:25

Well out of all the names I love arlo . It’s unusual but not whacky .

Sunshinegirl82 · 23/05/2020 17:35

Theo(dore, Frederick (Freddie), Joseph, Ben (Benedict), Max, Reuben, Henry, Oliver and Rowan.

Wheresthebiffer2 · 23/05/2020 17:35

You like Conor - what about Connal or Keir
You like Rory - what about Roddy/Rod/Roderick or Robbie
You like Laurie - what about Louis/Leo

sweetnosugar · 23/05/2020 17:37

How about Theodore? I think it’s a fab name.
Out of them names you have mentioned Arlo is the winner for me.

Theukisgreatt · 23/05/2020 17:43

Arlo is so 2018-2020 and will date quickly I'd have thought.

I'm with you - traditional names all the way. Could you think of a traditional name which would could have a more indie nickname?

Sunshinegirl82 · 23/05/2020 17:46

Edward and Ted?

Myneighboursnorlax · 23/05/2020 17:49

I know a 30 year old Arlo, so it’s not completely arisen from nowhere, although is much more popular now of course

Viletta · 23/05/2020 17:51

I can definitely relate! I kind of think DS will look like DH so try to think what name would suit DH.. I am not fussed about names that people don't like as they knew someone.. I think they'll associate the name with your DS and forget about that other person.

We decided to wait till DS is here to see what suits him best out of our shortlist.

Spied · 23/05/2020 17:56

I don't like Arlo. I did think it will date.
Ronan
Oscar
Leon
Noel
Ryan

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 23/05/2020 17:56

Print off two versions of the top 200 names for last year. Each go through and cross off all the ones you don’t like. See what is left.

If you can’t find some you both like go to top 300, 500, 1000 whatever....

bridgetreilly · 23/05/2020 18:17

Milo
Leo
Inigo
Marco
Rio

daisypond · 23/05/2020 18:26

Not Arlo. It’s on a quick rise and fall, and will date badly.

Aidan
Patrick

daisypond · 23/05/2020 19:02

Liam
Lucas
Luke
Owen

borntohula · 23/05/2020 19:13

I like your traditional choices and I like Arlo because it reminds me of the cute dinosaur in The Good Dinosaur...

Anyway, Theo has been suggested a few times and it's lovely. Louis is a nice name as well.

My boys' names are both in the Bible, didn't even realise that when I named them.

Singingatmidnight · 23/05/2020 19:17

Oscar or Owen? Both Irish in origin, but classics, fine to spell, not biblical.

But also - it's only been a day! Give it some time! We definitely had names that came and went, ones that we added to the shortlist over the months, others that we dropped... Don't worry straight away.

namechanger5678 · 23/05/2020 19:20

Your choices are 'boring' to him because he grew up with them but Arlo will just be the new Peter (which I like) of your babies era. Usually something traditional doesn't date too much and I would see as classic. Personally I do think Arlo is faddy and will go down the ranks in a few years.
What about
Max
Rowan
Edward
Theo

Also names that look good on CVs probably are just 'normal' names, although when your baby's older who know Arlo maybe 'normal'

Ellmau · 23/05/2020 19:33

John
Alexander (Alex for short)
Maximilian (Max)
Philip
David
Lawrence
Nicholas
Adam
Cormac
William
Leonard
Arthur

I like George and Frederick, Alfred is OK.

GinWithRosie · 23/05/2020 19:37

Arlo is very much 'in' right now and I personally don't like it at all OP...every second baby boy is an Arlo at the moment...and it's going to become very dated very quickly I think (plus, like you, 'o' ending names just don't do it for me...they sound weak somehow).

I'd stick to your guns and stay with a more classic name.

Ted (Edward or Theodore -never 'Theo' though!)
Will (William)
Louis
Alexander
Art (Arthur)

userabcname · 23/05/2020 19:56

Of the names you mentioned, I love George; it's absolutely one of my favourites! I'm not keen on Arlo. I think you'll both need to compromise as it seems you have very different tastes! As a pp said, a traditional name with a more modern nn such as: Alexander (Xander), Nicholas (Nico), Christopher (Kit), Miles (Milo). Or vice versa e.g. Benedict (Ben), Byron (Ron), Edwin (Ed/Eddie).

Whatsyourflava · 23/05/2020 19:56

If you like Laurence but can't use, what about Clarence

HaveAtEm · 23/05/2020 20:39

Clarence?? 😱 Please don’t pick that OP 😂

newmum332 · 24/05/2020 09:21

What about Joshua/Josh , it’s quite normal and I think it fits with the style of names you have suggested.

Schrodingerspeanutbuttersandw · 24/05/2020 09:25

Owen?

daisypond · 24/05/2020 09:29

What about Joshua/Josh
That’s biblical, and Old Testament Jewish, so doesn’t really fit the criteria.

Aclh13 · 24/05/2020 09:31

I know so many people called arlo I always saw it as quite a 'common' name if you get my drift but I also agree with your bf that the others suggested aren't overly unique