Struggling with naming our baby girl!!

[Kipper1993]

So when my partner and I first spoke about having kids we said if we had a girl we would name her Ivy for many different reasons. Anyway now we're expecting (a girl!) and his friend just had a baby and named her Ivy.. so the name is off the table..
However we are now struggling to agree on a name and I don't seem to like any!
He loves the idea of an alliterative name.. and he really wants to name her Isla Ivy, I don't like the name Isla, I think it's too popular and working in a school I asociate the name with other children.
He also likes Patsy (which I quite like) but he then says she'd be Patsy Pamela. (I'm not a fan of the alliteration)
He also has a very strong surname and its hard to find any names that go with it!

Did anyone else just not like any names at all? I've read so many books and lists and nothing is jumping out at me.. I feel like a failure before I've even begun being a parent and it's really getting me down ☹️

Any names I read out he rules out straight away and then questions me on why I don't like the names he chooses! We very rarely argue but every time we talk names now it gets a little heated! I can't believe this is so difficult! 🙈
Sorry this is such a long post!

Naming can be so hard especially if you have differing tastes.
Hubby and I were lucky we agreed on girls names and we had two daughters boys were a different story...
What other names do you like if we get a feel for your style we can offer some more suggestions 😃.
Hang in there it's an important decision and you will get there 😊

Sorry to hear you’re finding this so difficult. I agree with the other poster - tell us some of the other names you like so we can get an idea of your taste.

Love Patsy! That’s really cool.

Patsy is cute. Does it sound nice with the surname?
Don't worry about the middle name,
She'll be Patsy Pamela Kipper only on a few things, and Patsy Kipper on everything else.

I think the full name is fine.

So refreshing to see a name that isn't vowel-heavy or with only Ls or Ns or Vs.

Can you give us some more names
You like or dislike?

Ivy.

It really, really doesn't matter if her dad's friend also happens to have a daughter called Ivy.

There is no reason you can't still use the name Ivy, if you both love it. It isn't like the dc will be siblings or cousins, or around each other all their lives.

However, I do 'get' your difficulty re working in a school. I had to rule out several perfectly nice names when I was expecting, as they reminded me too much of particular dc

Why not take a week or two to scroll through a book or a list on the internet of names, separately from each other, and write out a couple of dozen each that you quite like / don't mind, and start from there ? See if there is any cross over, or if there is one that one of you really loves that the other at least 'quite likes' when it is suggested, even if it didn't make it on to their list.
I think when you are finding it difficult to agree, then saying "What about X" makes the other person a bit defensive if they don't like it straight away, but having a 'pool' of names you could look at together and perhaps 'rank', is less confrontational and might give you both time for a name to grow on you a bit.

Some suggestions for you 😊
Evie/Edie, Eilidh, Ayla,
Sylvie, Avie, Everly, Ivory, Navy
Caiomhe/Keeva, Nova, Ava, Maeve/Mavis, Evelyn, Viva, Vivienne, Niamh/Neve/Neva, Genevieve, Navia.

I like Lynn
and my name obviously :p

I agree with a couple of others who've said use Ivy anyway if you love it, even if a friend has just used it. There's no guarantee you'll always be friends, live close together or whatever. And even if you do, the two little girls will probably love sharing a name.

Patsy is nice. You could suggest other middle names. You know you get as much say as him don't you? Just don't agree to anything you don't like. So the baby is getting his surname? It doesn't have to you know. So he is already getting a large say in the baby's name. Just hold out for names you love. Patsy Fleur, Patsy Georgia, Patsy Juliet, Patsy Rowan, Patsy Frances, Patsy Luna, Patsy Lyla.
Other ideas
Molly
Lucy
Lottie
Bonnie
Betsy
Zara
Georgia
Tessa
Elsie
Alice
Cara

Prefer Patricia nickname Patsy. Then again, I'll always think about what a patsy is...

I agree with using Ivy...
With my first I’d decided to call a girl Grace if I ever had one so even though (years later) it was a very popular name we still did. Popularity didn’t matter so much anyway. And two little girls who know each other with the same name would be sweet).

Patsy is cute too but I doubt a moody teen (if she were to be!) would like it.

I think it’s a good idea to look up names separately. With my second my DH wanted names I utterly hated and he didn’t like mine, til a friend of mine told me if she’d had a girl what she’d gave called her (she wasn’t having any more kids) and I was just like -!yes!! That’s it! I knew my DH would like it too ( it was Lydia).

You might like some of these: Ida, Ada, Melody, Melanie, Willow, Aster, Flora, Imelda, Julianna, Honey, Carmen, Dora.

Good luck

Naming is so difficult. Me and my husband had such different taste on names...I love unusual, and not heard often (but not too weird) where he liked
traditional, strong names.

I knew what name I wanted 2 years before even getting pregnant and that name never left me!

Our boy didn't have a name for 5 days....in the end he said I could have the name I desperately wanted...we tried it out over a weekend with not telling anyone, and he suited it so much.

Write a list of names each, and see if you come up with any similarities or even the same name!

Ivy is beautiful.

The girls names I had listed when pregnant was

Iris
Elsie
Edith
Ellery
Peggy

Just use ivy. It doesn't matter.

Just use ivy. You both love it. That child won't be spending her life in your daughter's pocket. Names are a free for all!