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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Can't agree on baby's surname

116 replies

Cl4rkii · 09/10/2019 09:32

I'm not with the father of my 2 week old, but need to register her birth soon. The father is insisting that I double-barrell the surname, but I don't want to. What if we don't come to an agreement by the six weeks. What happens then!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

MaggieMcSplash · 13/10/2019 00:44

No brainier. You are not together. You need to give the baby your name, the father can be noted on the birth certificate.

Verily1 · 13/10/2019 09:33

pinkyredrose · 13/10/2019 10:27

If he wants to change either of these things he can marry you

how will that make a difference?

CravingCheese · 13/10/2019 10:38

how will that make a difference?

I'm not too sure. But what if she doesn't want to marry him? Or what if she still wants to keep her name? Or give the baby her name?

BikeRunSki · 13/10/2019 10:43

Use his surname as a middle name

RolytheRhino · 13/10/2019 11:08

Correct me if I'm wrong, but as they're not married, wouldn't the father need to be present at registration to be included on the birth certificate?

yellowallpaper · 13/10/2019 11:08

Phone the registry office. They will give you the legal advice. I believe it makes it easier if he is named as the father when it comes to child maintenance, but not sure about surname re PR

Verily1 · 13/10/2019 11:10

If a father doesn’t have prr but later marries the mother he gets prr then.

Starlight456 · 13/10/2019 11:26

This really seems to be a lot of issues you have done a dna test insisting how baby is named . It all sounds very unstable and no way should it be his surname.

You can add him to the birth certificate later

RolytheRhino · 14/10/2019 20:05

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3717525-Incompetent-staff-in-schools

Worth a read, relating to this topic.

calvinkleinjeans · 15/10/2019 09:10

Gob smacked at some of these replies !! He has to marry OP to have any official part in his child's life ?! WTF!

Topseyt · 16/10/2019 00:24

No, Verily. If he isn't on the birth certificate he doesn't have parental responsibility. Even if he subsequently marries the OP. She would still have to get him added to it in order to change that.

SoupDragon · 16/10/2019 07:30

Or he could go to court to gain PR.

MyOtherProfile · 16/10/2019 07:36

What did you do, OP?

cheesydoesit · 17/10/2019 20:08

Your name, obviously. I hope you were able to register your baby without him and do that.

Why on earth did you need to have DNA testing done? Was it to convince him the baby was his?

LuYi · 18/10/2019 16:47

Just to provide another perspective, I grew up with my fathers surname, even though he was never in my life. (Although my parents were together at the time of my birth.) I changed it at 18. It seemed silly to share a surname with someone who had no influence on my life whatsoever.

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