Going by middle name

[Jessica011]

Hi

I know it shouldn't get to me but it does... I'm sick of people saying my child's name is unusual and obviously by their faces hate my daughters name. In turn it's made me really hate my own daughters name and now I'd really like for her to go by her middle name.

I did have doubts for a very long time about her name as my husband choose it as in his heart he just felt she was this name and I've tried to love it too, but in truth I've suffered for nearly a year now with this name.

I hate the fact I dislike my daughters name.

Please help.

My question is, how quickly could a middle name be got used to? X

Lovely name, popular enough that people shouldn't go WTF at it.
The fact that it can be pronounced 2 different ways is not a bad thing, I don't there is agreement that one way is Right and the other Wrong.
Lots of names have variety in the way they are said. I don't consistently say my own name the same way every time, sometimes stress the first syllable, sometimes the 2nd.

Both names are lovely. Esme is more popular though so will probably not be the only one in her class. Alice is less so. I love Alice, but just can't get past the 'Alice the Camel' brownie song. Keep it as Esme.

It's funny because I just roll my eyes when I see another top 10 name! I spent ages trying to find a rare name and was so excited to find that there were only 5 babies recorded with my daughters name last year! Mission accomplished 😂

Esme and Alice are both gorgeous names! . I'm surprised people tell you it's unusual, I'm expecting a boy but before I knew I was considering Esme, but was worried it was too popular! Is she at nursery yet? Maybe it seems unusual to the older generation but it won't to hers, I know several little Esme's (without it having Ava/Evie type popularity).

I have two good friends who are known by their middle name at school and first name at home /vice versa, without it being an issue. Both made the choice to do this though, which I think is important. I think at 2 she knows her name and would be confused by a change.

It’s bit that unusual in Scotland to use your middle name. Confusing sometimes, but not unusual.

No she's not at nursery yet, I'm at home with her but we go to a couple of toddler groups and the popular names are Evie, Ella, Ava and Isabelle, no Esme's other than mine!

I meet a lot of grandparents at these groups who are taking grandchildren and they mostly think it's an odd name! X

Esme is lovely, as is Alice. Don't change it. I really can't see why anyone would pull a face at such a pretty name.

The lesson you cannot give your daughter is that other people's opinions matter so much they can influence a decision as fundamental as changing your own name! Think about it that way. You must stand your ground.

Esme is a fab name. I taught for 8 years and it is rare which is great.

Just wanted to add that Esme is at no 42 in the UK top 100 girls names - so really quite popular, and increasing in popularity I think. It sounds like you've been a bit pioneering with the name in your area though. It really is a lovely name.

I don't really like Esmé. But that shouldn't affect your Dh's and your decision to name your dd it.

Esme isn't an unusual name at all, it's likely to be in the top 20 this year www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.marieclaire.co.uk/news/popular-2018-baby-names-606233/amp

I prefer names that aren't all over the place so it being unusual wouldn't be an issue to me anyway. But if that's your concern there will be many around in a few years and people won't bat an eyelid over it.

I think it's the generation of people you're seeing - the grandparents at toddler groups make comments about my DS name "my father was called that" or "don't hear many of those" or "what an old fashioned name" BUT all the mums love it and it's now a top 20 name 🤷🏻‍♀️
Ignore them and stick with Esme, it's a lovely name.

I think it's a lovely name OP and the "old" names are coming back round, you're just ahead of the game in your area.

Could you find a pet name or nickname from it that you use? I know an Agnus who is introduced as nessa and I think that's lovely,
And an Elizabeth who is introduced as Ellie

In my experience it's a total pain being called by my middle name, as I have been since birth. I wish now that I'd officially put my names in the order I wanted them.