Using a friends name...acceptable?!

[AmeliaLayla]

Ok, my husband loves a baby boys name, totally loves it! He wants to call our 3rd child (due in 10 days) this name...problem? My best friend already has a 6 year old with the same name!

My friend and I have been friends for years and years, used to live together at uni and see each other regularly and live fairly close together.

However we don't all socialise as a 4-some (her husband and mine know each other through me and my friend not actually friends themselves) and our children don't go to the same school and only see each other on the odd weekend that we all get together or the summer holidays so it's my friend and I that are close rather than our families (if that makes sense!)

I really love the name too and would be very pleased to call our son the name (which is a fairly common top 15 name!) but I really don't want to upset my friend, I have asked her and she said she is fine if we use it but I wanted to know if anyone had a similar experience?!

Sorry for the long(ish) post!

Thanks in advance xxxx

If she's fine with it and both you and your husband like it, go for it! Doesn't sound like you'll be crossing paths that much and there's enough of an age gap that your friend's son might think it's cute that your son is called the same name. I haven't had direct experience of this but if I was in your friend's position, I wouldn't have an issue with it and might think it's sweet that you like the name as much as I do. If it was a close friend who was having a baby around same time as me and we were likely to end up at same school etc might be a bit awkward then but with fairly common names, I don't think anyone should get too attached to a name.

I wouldn't. There are so many names out there, I think your son deserves his own one.

My friend has a 13yo who has the name we have chosen for our DS. It is very rare, and part of why we love it is because we have a wonderful lad in our lives with the name. We asked our friend whether she (or her son) would mind if we used the name, and she was really chuffed and saw it as the compliment that it was.

She says her son is always saying "why am I the only one with this name!?" so he would be happy to have it be used by someone else.

I wouldnt use it if she had just had her son, but theres a generation between her son and ours so it seems to be more acceptable.

I think the fact that its a top 15 name makes it totally acceptable. Also with the age gap between them also - I'd definitely go for it if I was you!

I think it's a bit weird when there are so many nice names out there that baby could have for himself but then it's not so bad for a top 15 name.

I chose an unusual name for my 3rd - out of the top 300 - and my older son's classmates mother chose the same name a few months later, I was a bit cross tbh as I deliberately chose a name that they hopefully wouldn't share with another child in their small school. If it was a top 10 name then I could have understood that but most people hadn't even heard of it and she never even acknowledged that she'd used the same name!

You've asked and she's said it's fine though but I just couldn't imagine using a close friend's name.

I personally feel its fine.
The only names I won't consider are those belonging to my nieces and nephews.

I would. It's a common, popular name, after all. If you sat down and wrote off the name of everyone who counted as family or close friends and their children as well, that's a lot of names off the list.

Because it's top 15 I wouldn't worry, especially since you've asked your friend. If it was a rare name that would be different.

I think it's fine if your friend doesn't mind and it's a popular name that many other people have/will have.

It might be a problem if the boys were close in age and spending lots of time together or in the same class but in your situation it sounds like their paths will rarely cross.

Your pal says it's fine, so it's fine. I don't get the idea that a child needs their 'own' name- unless you call them something totally made up, there's bound to be someone else out there with their name....

There are 1000s of normal, lovely names to choose from. You don't need to 'make up' a name!

I think it's fine. Top 20 names are up for grabs IMO (except within families, not sure why people give their parents grandchildren with the same/similar names).

By the time you name dc3 so many names are taken up by someone or other it's hard to avoid them all.

Thanks ladies, that's brilliant advice and definitely puts my mind at rest