cousins with the same name??

[tidybooks]

we have 2 sons and ever since the first one we have always have our favourite girls name "in reserve" for a dd if one came along. Though we haven't actually discussed this with anyone.

Now we are expecting again with a month to go. Last week dbro wife gave birth to a little girl.. and gave her our name!!

Not sure what to do, think up a name from scratch.. or go with a variation of the same name, like Helen/Helena, or Diane/Diana. We love the variation so it would still be our first choice name iyswim.

Please give me your views, tia :)

I think you should pick something else, simply because I would want my daughters name to be unique and not to be confused with her cousin.

Very inconsiderate to the set of grandparents that are going to have two grandchildren with the same name! I'd be embarrassed about my son/daughter's lack of thought there.

In my husbands family there's lily, Layla, leila and lyla. All born 2010. Madness as all the same name virtually!

Anyone who has done a bit of nosing around family history will know that it used to be the norm for names to be repeated in families. I don't understand why nowadays everyone gets so distraught about people using the same names. It used to be seen as a compliment, not a crime.

It used to happen a lot years ago when people used to choose from a smaller selection of names. I have 4 brothers and two sisters so admittedly my parents had used up a LOT of names! On my mums side - he sister called her two boys the same as two of my brothers and an Uncle called his daughter the same as one of my sisters. Then on my Dads side his brother called his son the same as one of my brothers (one of the names already copied) and his daughter the same as my other sister. No-one batted an eyelid!

We just picked another name.

I know of cousins who are Mathew and Matthew.
Same surname.
Used to live next door to each other.

My grandmother and the first born female cousins of each of her (5) aunts were named after their grandmother.

It was one of those names that has lots of nicknames though so they were never called by the same name. My grandmother always resented being the youngest as she reckoned all the nicer nicknames had been used up by the time she came along.

This happened in my DH's family - his brother was born and then a couple of months later his cousin was born and given the same name. His aunt and uncle had been trying for a baby for many years and had always planned to give a boy this name, so they went ahead with it anyway. They are known as Simon P and Simon J (not the real name) in the family and it's fine.

Now we have gone and given our DS the name of Simon J's younger brother, just to add to the confusion!

I really feel for you... How close are you all? I mean if your brother lives In austrailia, I think it's fine. However if they're just round the corner and potentially be at same pre-school/school then it would be a no..

Go back to your list and have another look... The are soooo many beautiful girls names, there really is... You will find one you love as much just keep looking... Maybe start a new thread on here saying I liked Amelie but can't use it, what else will I like?

Good luck

LittleBairnFri 21-Sep-12 18:22:03

tidybooks if you've always referred to your future DD by this name and they were aware it then I would call your DC it. They were the ones who copied you regardless if the named first, if they find it awkward tough they can change the name. I'd let them know ASAP you'll be sticking with the name.

Did you even read the initial post LittleBairn????

The parents did not know that this was a pre selected name. They still don't know. They did not copy.

Sheesh.

Oh piss the fuck off with your sheesh I miss read the post hardly a bloody crime!

Personally I wouldn't do it however I don't think Amelia and Amelie are that similar you couldn't get away with it.

Sorry it's the human race and they won it. I'd use the sane name as a friend, even a close one, but not a first cousin.

we have cousins with the same name in our family. I've never really thought anything of it! they are about 10 years apart though.

Sheesh! Haha.

My DH has nieces called Laura and Lauren. I know that Laura's parents (the older of the two) are still pissed off about Lauren (the name, not the girl who is lovely). Both girls are in their 20s. It also poses problems for their grandparents who find it all a bit of a tongue twister.

My DD1s middle name is Rose, this was arranged well in advance, and is a family name. Her cousin who is 2 months younger is Rosie - I was asked when I was 4 months pregnant if I minded (SIL was about 2 months pregnant) and I said I bloody well did. However, as it is a middle name it doesn't really matter.

I think you need to move on and find a new name.

I've heard of a brother and sister called Patrick and Patricia, Pat and Tricia.

I would ask the relevant relatives if they minded you using a similar name. If you were my relative I wouldn't be bothered at all; I'd compliment you on your good taste.

Depends how often you see one another but see it from your ILs point of view - two neices both called Amelia would just be totally odd for them.

Slightly less related but my cousin's daughter has the same name as my brother's son. Well, actually the other way around. I don't think it was that much of a big deal but they'll only see each other once in a blue moon. Why don't you ask your DB how he feels about you using the name?

You having a name in your head doesn't mean that they stole it or shouldn't have used it, I'm afraid. Read some baby name books and find another entirely different name that you love.

I've been in a similar situation where I had a name picked out and someone used it before I could (a friend, not even a family member) I just had to accept it and find another. Good luck.

I would go for a totally different name tbh. I'd be mightily pissed off, but their child is here and has the name, so there's nothing you can do about it

Fwiw I'm one of the few people, it seems, to really dislike the name Amelia. So many much nicer names out there. What would your second choice be?

My sil did this even robbed the middle name i had picked out for ds3.So i picked another name and im glad i did it suits him much better than the other name.

Amelia is so so popular now. I suppose it makes it less weird than if it was a really uncommon name.