James - for a girl

[GlitterPinkRubberDucky]

Is this too "out there"? Have liked it since I heard of that actress James King.

Hey, I'm not the one that spends all day on Mumsnet criticising virtually every post I read.

me neither
glad we concur

Erm, I think we're wandering a little far from the point here. Take it outside you two!

I've got a terrible feeling I know you in RL.

scottishmummy, that is, of course, not you Mrs.

I don't actually know who james king is
off to google her

How about a more unisex name - something like Cameron, Robin, Elliot or Morgan.

How about Robyn? I think that's a lovely name for a girl and is seen more widely as unisex. I'm not sure what it would be shortened to apart from robbie, which I dont like for a girl...

james is lovely name
for a wee boy

Robyn could be Bobbie/Bobby (like Roberta from The Railway Children)

Why not John? Or Maurice? Lovely names for a lady.

Glitter - views on names are always doled out here with a healthy () dose of judgment.
Don't take it to heart please. You were asking a question and you are entitled to do that.

What about Quentin? the current Governor General of Australia is called Quentin Bryce. I can't imagine what her parents were thinking but at least she's done well out of having a boys' name.

It's the 8th most popular name for boys in England and Wales and the 3rd most popular in Scotland. It's so firmly established as a name for a boy that it's very difficult for people to give their 'thoughts on the name for a girl'.

The equivalent would be asking for people's thoughts on Grace (8th in England and Wales) or Ava (3rd in Scotland) for a boy.

And if you're going to bring feminism into the equation (always happy to!) it seems to me to be profoundly anti feminist to be happy to call a girl a name that is considered exclusively male. Particularly when nobody would call a boy Julia.

Did you know that there was a research project done which showed that if you didn't know the gender of a baby it was fqr better to assume it was a boy, because parents were far less likely to be offended if their girls were mistaken for boys than if their boys were mistaken for girls.

Makes you think, doesn't it?

The problems with James specifically, is that everyone will assume it is Jane. A girl would spend her whole life saying "No, James. Not Jane. James... Yes, I know."

Is it anti-femininist, though? Because I would have thought that if feminism is about equality and breaking down gender barriers, then it should be OK to call a girl James and a boy Sophie.

But I wouldn't be feminist enough to do it!

chipmonkey I see your point about breaking down barriers, but the fact is, there are plenty of other barriers still to be fully broken down and names are are the core of someone's identity. So I think it's starting at the highest fence, so to speak. It will also actually make gender barriers more significant in this child's life because they will be constantly reminded that they are a girl but who has a boy's name. The question of whether they're a girl or a boy will be a daily issue to be navigated. It would arguably be more feminist to try to create an argument for them where their gender just didn't matter, rather than them being reminded of it all the time and constantly aware that people think they have the 'wrong' gendered name.

And it would only be "breaking down the barriers" if there was the remotest possibility of anyone getting support for calling a boy Sophia. And not even the most insane of the "you love it you use it" brigade would go that far!

I am too lazy to read the other replies but, I like James as a middle name for a girl, would not use it as a first name.

using a typically gendered name for other sex isn't breaking down barriers it's obtuse unless it's a universal name like robin,France's
would one really call a boy tallulah because you like the name?I've never read a parent saying they wish to call boy Sophie,Rebecca,tallulah.ever
typically it's girls who parents give the masculine names,Stevie,Charlie or at push James.this may be in mistaken belief a masculine name has positive virtues, or will render the child strong etc?less encumbered by gender stereotypes

I think you have to be very careful not to project too much of your own personality on to your own children. It's very difficult to do, because we automatically think "I'd love to be called Kenneth!" or whatever. But our children are not us, and we have to choose names that will accommodate whoever they may be, and not project a personality onto them as soon as they're born. I, for example, am a bit of a hippy, so I love hippy names- But my children may want to be the chairperson of the local Conservative Association. (please, God, no!)

One other thing with giving girls' boys' names... A lot of teenage girls are very insecure with their femininity, as I was, and I would have absolutely cringed at having a boys' name. I had a low voice and was tall and awkward.

All this talk about giving a girl a boys name being feminist/breaking down barriers/whatever is nonsense. A girl is a female. They are not male. They are equal but they aren't identical.

I am female and want to be treated equally to males. I don't want to be male.