Moved to NZ and can't see advantages

[Spaglol]

Hi

This isn't a NZ bash.

We recently moved to a city in NZ (family of - 2 kids primary aged). Moved on nov 2023. I know it's very early days.

I can see how beautiful it is and people are lovely and we've had really positive experiences with people.

But... I just don't think it's worth it for me / us. The house we are in is freezing and we are paying so much. The food is so expensive. And I feel so far away. There are so few jobs in my area.

I totally get this is all my view and the information was out there for me to read before but I didn't comprehend the reality of not having an Aldi and being able to get to Europe etc.

Our house in UK hasn't sold yet. I am starting to think we cut our losses and go back?

As I said, I'm not having a go at NZ, it is me.

I'm worried if we move so quickly again, I'll mess my kids up. That's my major concern.

Thanks for reading.

Special shout out to the Kakapo. Why? Because it’s a freakin’ NOCTURNAL PARROT that runs like a lopsided penguin because it can’t even fly!!

It is completely appropriate to speak to any Kiwi anywhere for any reason. They take the concept of friendly to new levels.

This is enough to convince me to move there!

Sorry to tag on but in terms of the NZ wildlife, say if you wanted to go whale watching or twitching, is it the equivalent of eg living in Manchester and needing to get to Shetland to see those things?

Well, it's not easy to see kakapos, because they have to live sequestered on an island, to protect them from all things on the mainland that want to eat them. But there's lots of amazing countryside and other wildlife close at hand. I've only ever been to NZ for short trips from Oz but still managed to see loads while there.

Apparently they relocated a few kakapo to the mainland near Cambridge just last year. I think you wouldn't be able to visit that population, though, and the wee islands off the coast where the rest of them live are also probably not for visiting, though I don't know.

Whale watching: there are a few places like Kaikoura where you can do that.

Gosh OP. This is a hard one. I have lived in both Wellington and the UK. My first thought is that you have arrived just as everything shuts down a bit for summer. Unlike the uk that shuts down a bit work wise over summer then xmas, NZ has a massive slow down over summer only so Wellington can feel a bit dead work wise. That's about to change and so focus on the job hunt from now onwards. I sort of feel you'd get more out of the experience being located out of the city and in a town instead. Maybe catch a flight to Nelson for a weekend to see what smaller towns are like (only thing is then finding work). Nelson has the highest sunshine hours in the country and is just gorgeous. I am bias as grew up there but I think you'd feel like you've 'gained' something by maybe changing to a smaller town that is less 'city'.

You might even pull off your husband flying to Wellington for work if he works in a hybrid way?

I've done whale watching from Auckland CBD. We swam with dolphins at Xmas nearby. And we have penguins! I believe you can see them in the evening on the water front in Welly.

Zealandia is a great place for birds in Welly. In Auckland, there is a pest free Island called tiri tiri matangi which is amazing.

I like Wellington but as a place to live, Auckland has better weather and so much to do around it.

Agree that the job market will change in the next couple of weeks.

Wow thank you for the info. It sounds amazing. I’ve always wanted to go to see the wildlife.

OP I hope you settle into your new life there. Even if it does end up being for just the one year, make the most of it :)

Thank you for all the comments, again - I really appreciate your thoughts and time.

@Itrymybestyesido We've been on the ferry to Picton and around there and I can see it is really lovely. And less windy! My DH's job is Wellington-based and I think we are pretty much city people. Although I can see the benefits of that area. I get you though, about a different lifestyle being more of a gain, maybe I should keep an open mind.

@Pinenu - thanks. I hope you get to visit :)

@sashh - right will be getting heated throws and making it as warm as possible inside.

@GrouchyKiwi - and merino wool layers. Will get them. Lol, my mum also says that in the UK!

@Hardlyworking - thank you. Appreciate it. I like the idea of reframing. That is not my strength, but I've been practising thinking about all of this as a family year out.

Thanks everyone for all the comments. It's really helpful. And, I needed to get a grip. Have some options = lucky.

@Spaglol What suburb in North Wellington are you? (if you don't mind saying). I'm in North Wellington

@MrsMarkRonson
I've just PMd you 🌷

I've lived abroad for the best part of fifty years. I love where I live but it is very hard always having people I love on the other side of the world

Welcome to New Zealand!
I hope that you have warmed up… it’s very very hot in North Canterbury.
I moved from the Uk as a child and have lived here since but visit family in UK yearly.
New Zealand is very very different culturally. I agree supermarkets are extortionate… shop farmers markets , My Food Bag. Lots kiwis plant a vege garden.
Wellington is a fab city… the waterfront, little coffee shops, Cuba mall, Oriental Bay.
Your children will be fine… treat a year as an adventure. Rent out your home.
You can easily go back.
Lots of people moving to NZ so your children won’t be the only immigrants at school and once they are there you may have more time to yourself?
PM me if you want.
Nga Mihi.

You absolutely haven’t ruined your kids’ lives. Children are a lot more adaptable than we give them credit for.

As a forces child I moved around quite a bit, including internationally, and I and most other forces kids I’ve known haven't been remotely screwed up by it. Home is where you make it and they will be fine whether you come back or stay.

One thing you do need to try and do is stop converting and comparing prices and costs. Presumably your salaries are exponentially higher than they would be in the UK, so you have to get in the mindset of figuring out what percentage of your income something is, rather than what it would cost at home. I hope it all works out for you either way.

Poor Karori, always gets a bad rap. We’ve had the air con on the past few weeks, our house is so sunny it’s too hot. Like any house in Wellington, it depends what side of the hill you’re on. Not all Karori is damp and gloomy!!

OP, pm me if you want any help settling in. There are loads of Brits around, but it can be tough, especially for those who aren’t a half-kiwi couple and don’t have family ties/history here.

You have tried it and it isn’t for you, your kids will be fine, home is wherever you are. A year will fly, make a list of places to visit while you are there, it will give you something to focus on and look forward too. Either rent out your UK home or leave it empty for your return. Good luck.

Thank you for all the messages.

@FlatWhiteExtraHot you're right - I do need to stop automatically converting. Had a chat to myself earlier when in shop. Food is more expensive though, but I'm getting set up with farmers market and vegi boxes so hopefully that will make a difference. And it does make me more aware of how much I've been eating, like do we need three servings?!?

Thanks @GreenCereal I like the look of Karori. Good cycling and transport. And Zealandia - you must hear so many birds.

@LunaTheCat yes, agree Wellington is a great city. I think if we / I was more settled then planting a vegi garden would be one solution to prices. Used to share an allotment and that was excellent. Kids not so sure about courgette gluts , but...

@Coyoacan that is good to know it can be done.

Thank you @Roselilly36 yes, a plan of where to visit and when would help. It feels like we got through the summer holidays but that was all. I'll look to where would work and be cheapish at Easter.

Thanks again for the support.

I have friends who have moved back and forth between UK and Australia multiple times. They seem settled in Australia now. Their children are fine. If you decide NZ is not for you, it’s not the end of the world.

I lived in New Zealand (Auckland and Wellington) for a year in my early 30's, pre-kids. I know what you mean about the Wellington weather, a lovely sunny day often didn't feel like that because of the wind. But it is an absolutely beautiful, amazing country and I really enjoyed Wellington. Now I have young children I would love to go back there and travel around with them. A few people have said to just give it a go for a year, I totally agree. Do as many day trips/weekends away etc (family friendly hikes, camping, beaches etc etc) as you can do/afford and enjoy the adventure. That way even if you do decide to come home (and that's fine, it's not a failure to try something and decide it's not right for you) then at least you know you've made the most out of the experience for yourself and your family.

@Spaglol

I really suggest you do as others suggested, rent your house out and take pressure off yourself. We moved to NZ with jobs and found it hard at first. It takes two years to settle.

We returned to the U.K. several years ago pre covid and we have finally had enough of the U.K. Everything is broken here, from NHS, taxation, housing and we are utterly sick of it. In fact last week I went down a pot hole that wrecked my wheel and steering. Apparently the council are twenty years behind on road maintenance!! I just thought to myself that hopefully I won't see another U.K. winter.

We are fortunate we could afford to buy our way out of problems but I fear for our kids life. So we decided at Xmas to start the process of returning to NZ.

I would say though we found the north island a lot warmer so will be heading back that way. House is on the market and kids who are teenagers looking forward to it.

@Spaglol aw we lived in ngaio, the northern suburbs are lovely. Our favourite things in the summer were the skyline track and the khandallah pool. Both zealandia and the zoo are fabulous.

NZ houses are cold as someone who grew up here, currently battling with my mother to replace a window in the toilet that is permanently open - it is absolutely freezing in there on the winter. Living in a properly insulated home with double glazing feels very different but most older homes are not fitted out like this.

It definitely should not be freezing in Wellington at the moment, 8pm here and it is 19C in Wellington. I am in Hawke's Bay and it is 26C but we have a better climate. I am a Lancastrian and winter here is nothing when compared to there. NZ is crying out for staff so surprised you cannot find work.

NZ food is very expensive compared to UK, the supermarkets just don't compete, we need Aldi or Lidl to open a few stores. Power bills are high, petrol is expensive and we pay for GP appointments, current cost is around £28per visit.

We have a new house with central heating and double glazing, but it is definitely not as efficient as UK. I miss UK and M & S, Tesco etc and the proximity to Europe but I love NZ.

Did you do much research before you came here? Sometimes we just make bad decisions and need to return. I wish you the best of luck and if I can be if any help please DM me.

I'd rent your house for 6 months. give it until June /July and make a decision to come back in time for school in September if you are returning. Treat it like an extended holiday

2 months is a very short time to decide whether somewhere is right for you or not.I would give it a year, and see how you feel then.Its not all bliss here in UK and a year could just be an extended holiday. As you go out and about and DC settle at School ,it could look very different by then

There are no advantages living and raising kids in NZ, quite the opposite!
UK schooling is better in the UK, same with the helathcare.
Go back to EU before the kids will make friends and you will stuck here forever. All the nature beauties are in EU as well and more.
Xmas in summer sucks, nothing gets celebrated here like in the UK.
Shopping sucks big time as well, groceries as well.
Not mentioning all the fluoride in the drinking water, folic acid in the bread, EU doesn’t add, advantages Maori people get, very small minded country. If I could Id be back in the UK yesterday!
Ripp off culture, low wages, big expenses.
Dogs allowed literally nowhere!