Clarabel, I have seen you on Firsts thread, I am thinking of you too, and have been since I saw your first post.
To go through this on your first pregnancy, I am so very sorry, you will always be this babies mummy, I put some poems I copied from the bereaved mummies thread on Firsts post, and I am copying them here, along with the link to that thread. If you feel the poems are too much please please hit report and have my post removed.
With so much love. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
here
Its a beautiful thread, full of love.
I've loved my child right from the start,
A feeling that's filled my entire heart.
I went through the labor and suffered the pain,
For many long hours with nothing to gain.
I've spent sleepless nights being awake,
Though it's been a while my arms they still ache.
I've sat and I've wondered of how he would grow,
The love of my family that he'd come to know.
The sound of his voice as he learns to talk,
Watching his steps as he tries to walk.
I have a child that I really love so,
I am his mother yet nobody knows.
I've spent all these months feeling him grow,
I've lived through it all and have nothing to show.
I don't get invited to chat with young mothers,
Because I don't have a baby like all of the others.
I've got some stretch marks that I'd like to hide,
but I don't have a pram with a baby inside.
The people I've known for so many years,
Avoid me now, which adds to my tears.
I don't know how long I'll be feeling like this,
But one thing I know, my baby I miss.
When Mother's day comes it will be very hard,
I won't have any flowers, not even a card.
And just because he's not here with me,
I still have a son I wish I could see.
But one thing I know and this is for sure,
I'll be his mother forevermore!
and this
I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today
I asked "What makes a Mother?"
And I know I heard Him say.
"A Mother has a baby"
This we know is true
"But God can you be a Mother,
When your baby's not with you?"
"Yes, you can," He replied
With confidence in His voice
"I give many women babies,
When they leave is not their choice.
Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for the day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there's no need to stay."
"I just don't understand this
God I want my baby to be here."
He took a deep breath and cleared His throat,
And then I saw the tear.
"I wish I could show you,
What your child is doing today.
If you could see your child's smile,
With all the other children and say...
'We go to Earth to learn our lessons,
Of love and life and fear.
My Mommy loved me oh so much,
I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a Mom,
Who had so much love for me.
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much,
But I visit her every day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow's where I lay
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear.
Mommy don't be sad today,
I'm your baby and I'm here.'
"So you see my dear sweet ones,
your children are okay.
Your babies are born here in My home,
And this is where they'll stay.
They'll wait for you with Me,
Until your lesson's through.
And on the day that you come home
they'll be at the gates for you.
So now you see what makes a Mother,
It's the feeling in your heart
it's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start
Though some on earth may not realize,
you are a Mother.
Until their time is done.
They'll be up here with Me one day
and know that you are the best one!"