No joy at all...feeling lost

[Sweetpea86]

Hi I started my mat leave last week 6 weeks before I'm due. I've got crippling spd and my job is demanding and used 3 weeks annual leave. I had PND after birth or my son and found mat leave hard. Not with my little boy but every thing that went with it.

Im dreading time off before baby gets here and my son starts nursery which is worrying me.
I'm worried I'm going to to end up with PND again.

Any body have a better experience 2nd time around. 😔

You know what, I had PND again after my second baby. But we were prepared. It was still shit (obviously) but we'd arranged for my husband to take more time off after the baby, I'd been referred to the perinatal psychiatric service in advance, it was arranged that I would continue to see the midwife for 4 weeks after the baby (not usual for second babies). It all helped a lot.

Have you told your midwife about the PND last time? Once I did that I was referred to a specialist mental health midwife and she referred me on to the perinatal psychiatric service. Please ask for help if you're worried.

Take care.

Hi cyclehire, thanks for the reply no I see her next week and plan to tell her. TBH I think I'm already suffering I'm so anixouis about every thing and just feel so bleak. Sorry oi had PND 2nd time around. I do get what your saying about being more prepared for it. There is a help line to seek talking theapries I might phone them tomorrow I just feel I can't.

every one says are you excited and I have to lie I'm scared because of how I felt last time. I never had any problems bonding with my son in fact part of my problem was intrusive thoughts of people harming him that was the main problem.

Thank you for your advice

I was scared too. That's part of why I was referred I think. When I had my first son I thought we'd made a mistake. I thought I'd ruined my life. I wanted to have him adopted. I was so ashamed of that. With my second son I was terrified he was going to die. I don't mean to scare you. I just mean it was different. I am well now (happy, love my boys, I'm working, life isn't perfect, whose is but it's good) and I believe my recovery was quicker because I asked for help and did what I was advised.

Please be honest about how you're feeling.