AIBU my best friend's daughter only had a Muslim marriage and we are worried about custody of her son? (title edited by MNHQ at request of OP)

Are you in England? If yes, then either party can take the other to family court.

Where were they married?

Are they legally married or only religiously married?

What precisely are you worried about? It isn’t clear from your OP.

Assuming they live in the UK, it would follow the same rules as a seperation rather than a divorce I would think.

Custody, if not agreed amicably, would still be decided in Court.

In the UK children have a birth certificate which will state the mothers name. If the parents are not married then to have the father on the birth certificate he would have had to be there in person.

So is the father named on the birth certificate?

If he is not listed then he does not have parental rights. If he is listed then it just goes through court if they can't agree like any other dispute.

The Islamic marriage is irrelevant.

It's not true that the court usually decides custody, usually the couple decide themselves. Or the children when they are older. Often the man just fades away.

They should try to sort things out between themselves first. For a start it's cheaper.

It's just the same as relationship where they had a child without being legally married.

Yes.

Is it that you think your daughter will loose custody to her ex? What's wrong with the arrangement they have now?

Op i can understand your fear, if the partner/husband tries to sort things using Sharia law it could be difficult for your DD/GC

Sorry to hear about this situation.

I’m assuming you’re posting from the UK… Your daughter’s marriage isn’t legally recognised (unless they had a civil ceremony additionally?) so the division of any property is less clear and she’s less well protected if she hasn’t been working for the last 3 years/can’t prove she had contributed to the mortgage for example.

You seem worried that because they had a Muslim marriage they must also go through a shariah court to arbitrate who gets custody of the child. Shariah courts are like a voluntary system of advice, but there’s nothing to compel your daughter to participate in that process and again it’s not legally recognised in the UK. She would be best proactively seeking a family lawyer and using them to confirm custody and access. Don’t wait for him to start proceedings as she might end up going along with something that’s not in her best interests.

@joycies op legally, everyone above is right, but even Islamic rules, custody automatically goes to the mother.

More importantly if things are acrimonious she needs to make sure she has the childs passport and log that he is not allowed to leave the country with the child.

You need to clarify what country you are in

It is just like he's dumped her really.

The UK isn't a country. Is it Scotland, England, Northern Ireland or Wales. There are different laws you see.

Why does she think he's going to take the child?

@joycies no that's not true. Custody is split into two categories, one where the child is unable to make decisions, custody is automatically the mother. After that it's considered "sponsorship" and both parents can make a petition. The child can choose or a decision is made on who is the best fit, court or the sect they follow, that can all vary.

Custody always stays with the mother and her family for a young child. Rules on spousal support and child support is also quite clear.

Op all this is irrelevant as it's the law that counts! I just wanted to give you some peace of mind that your daughter won't just lose her kids and leave with nothing. She has rights! He's supposed to give her the same quality of life until she remarries. Like I said though, all this is irrelevant, it's the law that matters!

Since they are not married, I don't see how they can get anywhere with a Family Court

If they both have parental rights (she does automatically, he does as named on the birth certificate), the court can rule in a custody dispute. It can do that even if there was no marriage. Custody disputes are often a part of divorce, but they're not only available relating to a divorce case. Fundamentally, the court aims to settle disputes of various kinds when it comes to rights.

I'm assuming OP is referring to Sharia law in regard to the ages of children and the father having rights. Sharia law appears to only work in the UK if it doesn't conflict with Uk law. In this case we have no such stipulations so it is unlikely a British court would uphold sharia law. However it might be worth a Google of lawyers with expertise in this area to help put your daughters mind at rest.

Get legal advice including preventing a child being taken out of the country. Do the children have passports?

The family court is not only for married couples. Lots of couples have children without being married and break up and go through the family court.

Is he on the birth certificate op? If not, there is no way of him getting a passport for your gc without forging documents. If he does have parental responsibility and your dd thinks he’s a flight risk, she can apply for a prohibitive steps order. As for the deposit money, idk. It may be his goodwill to return it as I imagine your dd didn’t do this legally. It may be presumed to be a gift.

https://cartwrightking.co.uk/articles/family/islamic-marriage-recognised-in-the-uk/

Your daughter should get legal advice to prevent the child being taken out of UK without her knowledge or consent.

Her form of marriage ceremony is not legally recognised by UK law.

The family courts make decisions regarding contact/ living arrangements for children based on the best interests of the children in question. The law doesn't change depending on the religion of the parents/ children, except that the children's heritage/religious background will be taken into account as a factor determining what is best for them. But not necessarily main or overriding factor.

Regarding property, if there was no civil marriage, it's unlikely that the mother will have a claim on the father's assets, but she may be entitled to a share of the family home if she contributed to the deposit, even if not named on the deeds/mortgage. But the law is complicated here so it would be worth talking to a lawyer and taking some initial legal advice.