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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to want to kick DH in the nuts...

19 replies

ThatVikRinA22 · 09/07/2010 18:33

DD has been on a school residential trip for 3 days.

i work currently in our doctors surgery. i have been to work this PM.

he has just to come to meet me with DD - who has absolutely NO voice at all.

aibu to think my DH has not the sense he was born with to not think to phone me up at the doctors and ask if she needs to be seen?

he is a pratt.

AIBU?

OP posts:

Jux · 09/07/2010 19:29

Does she have a temperature? Is she acting unwell etc? TBH if the only symptom she has in no voice I wouldn't make an appt for her. They may just have done a lot of shouting screaming singing laughing arguing etc for 3 days, and she's tired.

I'm afraid that without more info I do think YABU.

Alouiseg · 09/07/2010 22:38

Ds has just got home from a school trip away without a voice. I'm not overly concerned, he's just been shouting too much.

lowenergylightbulb · 09/07/2010 22:50

YABU, I've had kids come back from similar trips 'voiceless' - it's a result of too much talking and too little sleep.

If she was running a raging temp and was obviously very ill then I could maybe take your point - but even so in that scenario rest + calpol would do the job...

What do you think a Dr would do? An illness of this nature would probably be viral anyway...so the advice would be as above.

I'm sorry that you are worried, but it isn't your husbands fault.

burnthedummy · 09/07/2010 22:52

why does a child who has presumably had a great time, shouted and screamed themselves hoarse, with no pain, temp and/or other symptoms need to waste time and money going to see a doctor? The only concerning things here are your hysteria about a perfectly well child (if she was sick, you would have been informed as such by the school)and your desire to kick your husband because of his calm response to the situation. Relax, enjoy the quiet and if the voice has not returned tomorrow, get yourself down to a chemist for a throat spray

FiveGoMadInDorset · 09/07/2010 22:52

YABU

BrightLightBrightLight · 09/07/2010 23:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

ThatVikRinA22 · 09/07/2010 23:32

she is coughing her guts up. and she looks terrible. she isnt well.

its not just a lost voice. and i still think he is a dick of highest magnitude. on Monday i have a test out of the county. it will be left to me to sort her out of school care and take her to the gp. he could have used the ounce of common sense he appears not to have to get her seen tonight.

and it will be me up all night with her.

so im still very pissed with him.

OP posts:

lowenergylightbulb · 09/07/2010 23:35

It could still be a virus, but if it's that serious why are you not at A+E now?

I'm sorry, I hope your DD is better soon, but I do think that you need to calm down a bit.

Original poster

ThatVikRinA22 · 09/07/2010 23:38

or yes its not serious enough to trouble a doctor (who i work with!!) but its serious enough to go charging down to A&E and sit with the drunks?

she is asthmatic. her chest is very tight, and if need be i will take her - but why should it always be me? why cant her father just think for once in his frigging life. he has gone to bed. lucky fucking him.

OP posts:

FiveGoMadInDorset · 09/07/2010 23:39

Well now we have all the info then yes YANBU

Original poster

ThatVikRinA22 · 09/07/2010 23:44

i dont know why i posted this in AIBU cos i bloody well KNOW im not. she is ill, asthmatic and he just once again leaves it all to me, despite the fact that i have been home today for all of 20 mins and it could have so bloody easy to just phone me up at work, say listen to your DD, can you get her in with a gp.

but noooooo

thats just too frigging easy. and he found this thread so now thinks he is off the hook and that i am being unreasonable.

so he can take her to A and bloody E. i want to go to bed. for once.

OP posts:

burnthedummy · 09/07/2010 23:55

so your child has now gone from a lost voice to being asthmatic, coughing,looking terrible and worthy of going to A&E ....and instead of taking her/ arranging for her to get there, you are on the computer STILL going on about a decision that was made however many hours ago? You are thinking of going to bed? While your child goes to hospital?

Yes, absolutely, well done, point proved, you go off to bed- that'll teach him...

er.....where exactly is your daughter in all of this? Can you see her through your anger?

hmc · 09/07/2010 23:58

Since she has asthma YANBU - but you might have mentioned that in your first post!

Jux · 09/07/2010 23:59

Yes, but you didn't tell us all the facts. You just said she had no voice. You didn't say she was asthmatic, her chest was tight, she was coughing her guts up and looked terrible. You only said she was voiceless.

Don't be cross with us because we, quite reasonably, disagree with you when you haven't given us the facts.

Well now I've got the facts I'd say YANBU.

Original poster

ThatVikRinA22 · 10/07/2010 12:29

oh fgs im not cross with a bunch of strangers on a forum, im cross with DH. and it really helps if people read the post before flaming - i didnt say I was going to bed - i said he was. i stayed up with her

anyway - i phoned out of ours service. took her to duty gp at the hospital

what made me cross was that i work in the doctors and he could have just phoned me and saved a whole load of hassle.

instead i had to take her to out of hours service, wait about in hospital. when it could have been so easy to phone me at work and say "do you think she needs seeing - ive just picked her up and she isnt well" instead he just left it.

now im on the verge of hiding my own thread, i was just venting about my DH being a first class numpty. job done. ive vented.

OP posts:

burnthedummy · 10/07/2010 12:51

ok so you vented.....just to clafify though...I did read the post and I quote:

"...so he can take her to A and bloody E. i want to go to bed. for once."

you didn't say HE was going to bed. You said he could take her to A & E while you went to bed.

so, maybe YOU should read YOUR thread before YOU complain about people not agreeing with you when YOU haven't provided all the information.
Do hide your own thread.....i would too if it was mine.

GoldenTomato · 10/07/2010 12:54

Vicar if it makes you feel any better YNBU now we are possession of all the facts.

Same happened to me with DP and DS2 (3 at the time). He's not been diagnosed asthmatic but has had a number of 'episodes' re breathing. DP took DS's out for day to see his eldest son. Returned home at about 8pm. Told me DS2 had been wheezing all day plus his DS (who is asthmatic and was about 11 at the time) had suggested DS2 may be asthmatic as the wheezing sound similar to his asthma. So what do you think DP did about it?? Absolutely nothing! Apparently he didn't want to 'waste the whole day sat in A&E' and he didn't think it was that bad (although his 11 year old son did)!!! Anyway sat with DS2 until he went to sleep when things seemed to improve but he woke screaming hysterically at 3am that he couldn't breathe. I ended up bundling him into he car (DP didn't even get out of bed!!!) drove to the nearest A&E where he was transferred via ambulance to paediatric A&E where he receieved treatment for asthma and was fine.

The particularly irritating thing is I am the bread winner in the family with the high powered job but it's always me who ends up leaving work and sorting out issues like this because DP just doesn't think or just knows I will do it.

compo · 10/07/2010 12:57

So what did the gp do? How is she?

FellatioNelson · 13/07/2010 22:32

Er...my son used to go on regular hill-walking trips to Wales. He ALWAYS returned sans voice. My three boys have been away to summer camp, or skiing with the school etc, and return sans voice every time, and now my eldest goes to gigs and festivals - come home, no voice. It's normal. It's called screaming your head off for 48 or 72 hours when you are letting rip and having fun, without your parents there to tell you to calm down and go to bed. No doctor needed!

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