Is this your nanny?

[OTTMummA]

would anyone here who employed a nanny want to know if they had smacked your child for no good reason?

or is it arranged between some nanny's parents that there is a level of discipline that is agreed upon, including smacking?

I witnessed something today, and am not sure what to do.

I would want to know if any adult had smacked my child regardless of the reason - if it was to stop one of the DCs running into the road or because the adult had 'lost it'.

If you tell the parents then they can decide what to do with that information.

are nannies allowed to smack?

I wouldn't allow a nanny to smack my child.

In fact, I recently went rather bonkers with my dad who smacked my ds on the back of the hand for snatching something off the table. Disciplining of that nature is definitely up to the parent, unless they have specifically allowed the nanny or whoever the right.

What did you witness? Really need to know to answer your question I think...

In principle i would definately want to know if someone looking after my sons smacked them but I do think there are a few situations when it would be justified (eg smacking hand out of the way of something hot etc)

I could see a situation where a nanny and mother might agree about smacking, but still I think text or email the mother anyway.

How long has that nanny been with that family and how old is the child??

If it was my nanny I'd want to know, but as DD is 6 and DS1 is 4 they would tell me.

i used to be a nanny and have whistle blown on others who were overstepping the mark!

smacking....no! never

If you know the parents then tell them - they'll either have asked the nanny to discipline in this way so be fine with it, or they'll be horrified and want to know.

I use a nanny for the 3 days a week I'm at work - I'd go ballistic if she smacked my DCs, and was pretty dubious to find out (from DC1) that she smacks her own child. I don't really want them seeing that sort of thing - I think it's a smack on the hand rather than anything more, but still...

If someone saw her smacking one of my DCs, I'd want to know about it. I would think it was completely unacceptable, no matter what the circumstances.

Do you know it was a nanny not the parent? Do you know the parent?

I would seek to tell someone even if it was a toddler group leader or someone who knew the parent - as a nanny I am aware that I am constantly scrutinised and am more than happy to have concerns raised if needs be to my employer - it makes me glad someone is watching out for my charge.

I employ a nanny, and I would definitely want to know. It's then up to me whether I have soem agreement with nanny (to be clear I don't, and if I ever found out she had, then she would be out)

yes i know the parent, and was just about to go over and say hi to the nanny, but she hadn't clocked me yet, and then i saw what she did.
I turned on my heels tbh as i was so shocked, but have been fuming for the boy
He really didn't deserve it.

His bottle fell out of his stroller!!?? why was that his fault?
and she did give him quite a whack.
I think i have to say something my friend, or it will eat me up.

Of course you have to say something. Totaly unasseptible.

Please tell your friend. Who knows what will happen next time.

And think of how you would feel if she knew someone had hit your child and she chose to keep that information from you.

I suspect that different people have different arrangements, so difficult to make assumptions. It's written in my nanny's employment contract that smacking is included in the definition of gross misconduct, resulting in instant dismissal and termination of her employment. So if it was me, yes, I would want to know! I am not sure you're going to get too many people come along and admit that they do allow their nanny to smack their child, even though that probably does exist in some arrangements.

yes you should say something

be prepared for a rough ride - she may not want to believe you if they are happy with the nanny in every other way, or would have difficulty replacing her.

On the other hand they may have had niggling doubts and be looking for an excuse to get rid.

Very sadly, not all nannies/childminders/nursery workers are good at their jobs - if she was happy to do that in public, who knows what else goes on?

If she's whacking the child in public what on earth is she doing in private? Definitely tell.

You definitely have to say something.

you need to tell her, poor kid

Oh god do say something. If it came that naturally to hit him for that then what other hits and slaps is he getting? Poor poor boy.

If she hit him for the bottle falling out the pram, what else is she hitting him for? If you know this mother then I'd say something.

OMG please tell the Mum - I would want to know iiwm.

TSC not saying its right but there are some exemptions for taxis - although I'm right with you and would not want my DC transported without proper seats