To think most men's sexual repertoire is the same?

[littlestmummystop]

I've been single for 15 months now and had a few, ahem, encounters.

I've not had sex with all of them, but about six or seven ( or eight ) have come close. This is what gets me..

They ALL had EXACTLY the same repertoire. Kiss hard, without removing lips for few minutes, move hands under top, remove bra, pull top up, suck each nipple a bit. Then go for the waistband.

Quick fumble. [buscuit]

For first time I do tend not to take the lead, so maybe my fault, but do most men get told this is the way to do it ??

I find it really boring... and unromantic.

lol @ puss

It could be the Magnum mini with nuts in. They don't last long and are a bit bland.

AHHERRMM! saggy's keith definitely NOT Keith Chegwin!

Saggy - are you behind the old pirate sex thread then

Nooo! That's before my time! We were at a fancy dress party! He looked gorgeous! he can hoist my main brace any day!

I will have you know my Magnum is nice and hard,I some times use it when I am cooking to tendrise steak or flatten chicken breasts

I have to say the magnum thread has had me ROFL some much needed laughs .

It also reminds me of my ex I caught him having stuck his willy in the hoover (because his wind up mate told him it was great) and gotten stuck he was so mortified especially as he couldn't turn it off so had to stay there with me PSML .

On another occasion I went to the toilet came back to find him on all fours leopard thong on growling, I collapsed on the floor was clutching my sides laughing unfortunately he didn't seem to see the funny side I still can't believe we split up over a leopard thong .

Yes well Jason, I'm sure dinner party invites go down a treat in your house

@slushy
I have put my willy in the nozzle of a vacume cleaner too( i must of been 15/16 ish)I think every man as at some time or another,I think it must be a man thing
It scared the bloody life out of me when I switched it on. I was torn between trying to get my willy out and switch it off
Never again

I'm a little bit in love with Saggyoldclothcatpuss's DH. :grin:

His swelled up (he was using the wrong type of hoover apparently) so he was stuck there screaming for me to switch it off.

He was fairly young he was about 18 at the time what is it with you men and doing these stupid things, why did you try it surely you realized it might really hurt, I mean I personally would not want to stick a hoover anywhere.

I think I was perhaps wrong and insensitive to laugh he was in a lot of pain for weeks and every time he limped I could not help smirking (no that he saw).

The wrong type of Hoover?? So, what hoover is designed for cock sucking?

Wonder if that is covered in the review section of Mnet

Cleaning pet hair 9/10
Ease of use 8/10
Good cock suckage 2/10

I think it was because it was a dyson (being bagless an all) and the no loss of suction .

I believe there was an ad campaign once which ran something along the lines of "Nothing sucks like an Electrolux". Perhaps that's the brand to use?

Mine is a Bosch...German make...

I shall never see my hoover in the same light again...or a meat tenderising mallet thanks to Jason

Filthy lot

@pussinjimmychoos
The next time you are using your meat tenderising mallet I dont want your mind to wander

Goodness- i think I've seen Saggy's Keith

Nah Portia, my DH is better endowed than that!
BHLS, hands off, he's mine!