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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to ask DH to put his pants on...

95 replies

scatteredbraincells · 30/06/2010 18:25

...when he massages my back!
I get a lovely massage a few times a week before sleep and I'm very grateful, but DH insists on being naked.
Then his willy gets all excited (obviously at the sight of my perfect figure ) and suddenly I go from relaxed and about to fall blissfully asleep to having a bottom covered in c**k juice. I turn around and sure enough he has an erection.

I think he's thinking about sex and it ruins my massage, he swears he's not, only his penis is and he (DH) is well aware that this is not leading to sex.

I try to relax but my bum is still wet, he doesn't understand the problem, apparently if you love someone you don't mind their bodily fluids.

I have asked him a couple of times to put a pair of pants on before the massage and he refuses, then the whole experience is crap. Arrrrgh!

OP posts:
chefswife · 30/06/2010 20:13

I agree with that post... definitely just f@%$#k him! lol I wish my DH would give me a massage before.

rosieposey · 30/06/2010 20:15

Ha Ha Ha im ROFL here...

expatinscotland · 30/06/2010 20:16

How about just giving him a suck off before he gets started, or wanking him as suggested.

booyhoo · 30/06/2010 20:17

emm, you think he is thinking about sex while doing it? you think? what gives you that idea?

noddyholder · 30/06/2010 20:18

Yes listen to expat and get toned cheeks or me and get a toned arse either way you win its beginning to sound like a mini spa

JuJusDad · 30/06/2010 20:22

"mini spa"

AnyFucker · 30/06/2010 20:27

you should bottle it

expatinscotland · 30/06/2010 20:37

and then sell it.

on a fetish site.

scatteredbraincells · 30/06/2010 20:40

LOLOL, off to bed with a bottle then
Will let you know where to buy it online

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 30/06/2010 20:42

"Roll up, roll up, get yer pre-cum here...."

Fights the seven signs of ageing

honeydragon · 30/06/2010 20:43

you could call it -oil of no lay-

Mumcentreplus · 30/06/2010 20:45

LOL...

noddyholder · 30/06/2010 20:46
Grin
JuJusDad · 30/06/2010 20:48

hahahahahahaaaaa

SoupDragon · 30/06/2010 20:48

" I think you're caught between a rock and a hard place"

Or, indeed, between a cock and another hard place.

BrittanyBeers · 30/06/2010 20:52

Keith?
What the fuckity fuck?

fyimate · 30/06/2010 20:54

Wish my DP would give me massages! I think you're being a bit selfish. (imo)
I dont see why anyone would feel put off by their own DH's cock juice or whatever. The fact people actually find this thread offensive or gross is also wierd.
It's life and nature. You never seen or felt precum before?
But if it puts you off then thats your preference, either give up the massages or deal with it.
I think you're very lucky to have a DH that likes massaging you and tells you how sexy you are. Not many women have that.

Mumcentreplus · 30/06/2010 20:56

I have to say if DH massaged me ...DAMN!..once he started to massage me bum it would me all over!!

virgomummy · 30/06/2010 21:02

pmsl at oil of no lay

Saggyoldclothcatpuss · 30/06/2010 21:07

OH MY GOD! I can't believe this thread!

bearcrumble · 30/06/2010 21:13

Hahahaha @ Honeydragon

5inthebed · 30/06/2010 21:15

Oil of no lay

herbietea · 30/06/2010 21:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ThatVikRinA22 · 30/06/2010 21:33

god thats funny. very clever! oil of nolay...

Tombliboob · 30/06/2010 21:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

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