to be a bit embarassed that dd2 told her teacher that mummy is always...

[Northernlurker]

on Mnet

What she actually said was ' Mr X - does your wife go on mumsnet?' Mr X replied he'd never heard of Mumsnet and dd2 apparently said 'oh my mummy is always asking me to switch on the computer because she has to go on mumsnet'

I know all this because dd2's teacher greeted me at school yesterday by saying 'Ah hello Mumsnet expert' - I swear my internet life flashed before my eyes! Obviously I stressed the informative side of the website......
Dd2 really doesn't 'get' discretion......

My DS had to write a letter and send it home. He wrote his to his dad and school said it was to his and mummies house.(we sent SAE to school) He insisted dad lived there too.

Really confused school as dads details say his name and N/A for anything else as he lives abroad and hasn't seen DS or over 3 yrs. (his choice btw)

School actually rang me to check

I know! Realised as I was typing I wouldn't dream of doing that with DD ever!

I haven't had any of these embarassing moments yet, but given that my DS has come out with some cracking stories at home I'm sure they will come soon!!!!

Helping out in dd's class when they were talking about fire safety.The undertakers little boy piped up that his mummy liked firefighters so daddy had a costume that he wears to make her happy

Wow these are funny!
But I'm dreading what stories my DD will come up with when she goes to school!
She could talk for England given half the chance, even to complete strangers!!
She actually got a free piggy bank from the bank because my DD got chatting to the Manager!

I took the dds to a match that DH was playing in. At the end the team was on the pitch for medal giving. As we approached the team from behind dd1 who was 3 at the time piped up to a lady next to us
'We don't know which one of them is my daddy'

Needless to say I quickly tried to point out that dd couldn't recognise her dad as they were all dressed the same.

Lol! Some of these have got me giggling.

I also remember embellishing stories about my weekend so that they would be more interesting. Often involving fire engines rescuing someone or Dad falling out of a tree when we went scrumping

Another 70's child that was locked in the car whilst parents were in the pub - but I was lucky cos I usually got a bottle of coke with a straw and a packet of crisps

My dd told her teacher at school I had been reading her Facebook page.... the teacher soon "closed" her page!

Were all the straws made out of paper in the seventies? When me and my sister were sat in the car our straws had disintegrated before we had finished our drinks!
Great laugh all!

Mr ds aged 4 did a drawing in nursery of the family and wrote our names and ages down. Its bad enough them vervally saying your age

I've shared this one on here before but my mum was a reception class teacher and had one boy stand up and tell everyone that his favourite room in his house was his mummy and daddys room because he can lie on the bed and look at himself in the mirror on the ceiling. My Mum could never look the parents in eye again..

I'm absolutely terrified about what my dds will come out with when I'm not around..

fecking Norah, jen. Paper straws. Kids these days don't know they're born...

Paper strass were indeed utterly pointless. I still see plastic ones as being for best though

When DD was 2.1 we went abroad on holiday and on our return were showing our passports at immigration when the lady asked DD (whose passport photo was taken when she was three months old), "Is your name XXX?" DD promptly said, "No".

Luckily the woman saw the funny side and DD wasn't deported. I'm now hoping that her passport isn't checked when we travel through the Chunnel this August - gawd knows what she'll tell them this time!

It'sGrim - we weren't locked in the car with the (flat) coke and the (usually stale) crisps. We sat outside in the car park. Children weren't allowed inside the bar. And we travelled to the pub on the back of my friend's dad's flat bed truck.

It was great!

It was my birthday last month and when i went to pick dd up from preschool her teacher met me at the door & said Happy Birthday & can i say you look great for your age , i was & until she explained that dd had told her i was 65
.

My DD told my Mum the same thing (well, Mumsnet and Face book). DMum was not impressed, even though she spends every evening upstairs on the internet herself, then whinges that all my Dad does is sit on his bum watching telly!

Aged about 5, I told my teacher that my sister, then aged 2, had cut my hand with a breadknife, which was why I had a bandage on. The bandage was my hairband. There was no cut. What was I thinking?

Cringe cringe cringe every time I think of it.

My Husband had been working away for a long time and was only home every 2nd weekend. My Ds told his teacher that mum and dad had seperate rooms to themselves when his dad came to see him He meant Dd's study a room I never go in (too messy) but the teacher gently enquired if there was trouble at home.

He also told a teacher that we had dogs that just had puppies and some were for sale as they upset the iguanas and snakes, and meant we had to stop fostering! The teacher was full of my praises re time management - and even asked to buy one. I was mortified.Never had pets, except a goldfish and have never fostered although DS1 would love to.

When I worked at a pre school one child told us that her mum put her teeth in a glass by the bed at night. We all laughed at her great story, made up of course, and the supervisor shared the humorous story with her 30ish year old mum when she collected her later.

But her mum confirmed that it was indeed true, that she really did have false teeth.

We didn't know where to look!

I found a diary I had written at about 7 years old, apparently I went to school and 'had telly' every day and when I was off sick from school I 'had telly' on those days too.
The seventies right there

Sorry I haven't read this thread. But if she knows you are on mumsnet she knows your name now. Did someone already point this out?

Teacher was a he and if he was interested enough to go on mumsnet and lurk for two days till I posted this then good luck to him!

Seriously - I don't post anything on here that I wouldn't say in real life. If I want to be private I'll namechange as a one off.

DS age 3 went through a phase a few months ago of telling everyone he met that his dad's willy was very big and very hairy. I of course only encouraged him by finding it absolutely hilarious.

Oh believe me, you probably don't want to know WHAT they grass you up for at school! Trust me, your child's teacher probably knows alllll your secrets!

I used to love parents evenings when you had their work out for parents to read just because of the reactions and howls of laughter with squeals of "Oh my God I can't believe she's written that" from a few kids' mums! (Thankfully they had a sense of humour and I'd got a good rapport with them).

Worst one (from a family member this one so I'm not breeching professional confidentiality). I have twin cousins, and one of them went into school and quite happily said, "My daddy gives me secret cuddles in the shed at Uncle X's"... you can imagine the ensuing child protection storm at that one - however, it was completely innocent - the cuddle was a secret one because, having twins dad tried desperately to play fair, so chucked one of the girls a sneaky hug when the other wasn't around so neither felt left out! School of course had had to pass that one up for investigation, thankfully everything came out as the complete innocence it was - but gawd, one of those times you really cringe at what they're saying!