Why is 'gingerism' an acceptable form of prejudice?

[Pacific]

Came home from a late shift last night to find my cool and handsome 13 year old DS crying after some cyberbullying because he has reddish hair.

The story came tumbling out between sobs. He had been out on Saturday afternoon with his pal and their respective 'sweethearts'. The two girls also happen to be best friends.

After they all split up and made their way home about tea time, Ds was getting hassled on the bus home by some local neds getting called 'ginger c**nt' etc. They got off at the same bus stop. One punched DS. DS retaliated (he is rugby player) and ended up giving the boy a bloody nose. The boy's friends ran off when they saw DS not to be messed with but bloody nose boy has threatened DS that his Dad and big brother will get him. This is not an empty threat....we know who they are. DS is now terrified.

Next thing that happened, On facebbook last night DS's girlfriend's best pal started taunting his girlfriend about the ginger hair. DS somehow managed to see this convo. It was really horrible stuff and coming so close after the attempted beating (just for having red hair FFS) was all too much for him and he was sobbing his heart out. I haven't seen him cry in years.

Bastards. Why is this OK? Why do people pick on redheads? Where did this come from? Why is this prejudice not tackled?

Ginger Massive.

Undertone-your hair is beautiful!!! Mine is red but much darker than yours, it is actually brown underneath. It has lots of different natural shades of red/ginger/blonde/brown and everyone comments on it

Unfortunately i had the confidence knocked out of me at school, constantly teased about it. I still feel like everyone is looking at my hair (in a bad way) and that it makes me ugly I have it constantly tied back still. I left school 8 years ago now!! I think my social phobia/lack of confidence and self esteem stems from the teasing i got at school

I am trying to love it, but have to admit to breathing a huge sigh of relief when both my DD's were born with beautiful dark brown hair. I am so relieved that they will never go through what i went through.

It is awful and so wrong. Who bloody cares what colour hair people have. Sorry to hear about your DS OP. So very sad for him to have so much upset just because he has different colour hair. Totally unfair.

"origional snide comments not your strong point then?"

Love it wish i'd used that one!

I've only ever heard people comment very positively on my dd2's hair, but I'm sort of glad that she won't experience nasty bullying because she is oblivious to unpleasantness and can't be left alone anyway because of her disablity. It makes me very sad that your son is going through this- I wish I knew how to stop it.

I've never understood prejudice against red hair - it's a gorgeous hair colour. I think it may have become more common - certainly didn't happen in my primary school, I first came across it reading Anne of Green Gables.

Not red headed myself but have occasionally been teased for other physical characteristics so I do sympathise. In my case, having curly hair (which left me pretty much unmoved - so what, frankly) but white van drivers yelling 'you don't get many of those to the pound' as if I'd never noticed that I've been blessed with F-cups.

I have red hair and was mercilessly taunted at school but as soon as I left school it all changed and it was suddenly very attractive it seemed although I still hated it!I don't mind it now though and it has kept its colour well when many of my friends are grey!I feel for your ds and dd but I can tell you it won't last!My ds has a close friend with red hair and when I hear them call him ginge I hate it but this boy seems unperturbed and is v popular and good looking.I think we should have national ginger day!

Edam I have the double whammy of red hair and big boobs!If anyone says 'You don't get many of those to the pound' I say No but you get a fair few of those!I heard Arabella Weir say that once and have kept it for myself!V useful!

SILs BF is ginger. She gets Tom to call him ginger bloke. He doesn't make any attempt to be annoyed at that. I try to tell Tom his actual name, but SIL insists on ginger bloke . I don't want Tom calling any child, ginger kid or anything in future. SIL has no kids btw.

Next time it happens, I will make a point in saying something.

Noddy, I've found being fat helps. My breasts are the same size but my tummy is bigger so it's less obvious that I make the young Babs Windsor in her top Carry On Days look flat chested. Whenever I've been thin, I've had loads of unwanted attention from irritating men who think they are oh-so-witty or can't seem to keep their eyes on my face...

Hi all.I let DS see all your positive comments. He is a bit reassured but the bullying has been going on for so long now that I have agreed that he can try dying his hair.

I think that dying his hair will give more ammunition to the bullies. I have tried explaining that it is his sensitivity that is causing the bullying, not the bullying that is causing his sensitivity but he doesn't have the emotional maturity to understand that yet.

So, against my better judgement, I have agreed to buy a semi-permanent light brown dye for him.

I will let you know how it goes.

I agree - it won't help. It will just prove to them that he feels vulnerable. To be honest, if they wanted to pick on him, they'd have found another reason. Bloody little shits. Sometimes I feel like stating a 'mothers massive' vigilante group against bullies. They make me puke. I could easily do them real physical harm, and I'm a pacifist! DH has had to almost restrain me before now when I've confronted a gang of kids who targeted my DS.

To be fair, though I'm obviously pretty scary, cos I've had to do it twice now, for DS1 and DS2 and the problem stopped in it's tracks.

You too, can benefit from my patented method, in booklet form with free motivational CD, for just £19.99 plus postage and packing, with a full money back guarantee. Change your life today and sign up. Seminars also available for just £250!

I mean starting a massive, not stating.

Pacific - perhaps he should dye his hair scarlet - or magenta - rather than disguise his hair colour, overstate it. I agree with Tiggy that trying to hide it gives away that he is sensitive about it - it's not like they don't know he's got red hair, they do - so trying to hide it from bullies who know him isn't going to make it go away.

OTOH - if he dyes it up several shades, he's metaphorically sticking 2 fingers up at them and going "so it's red - so what?"

Be careful with school if you are dyeing his hair, some can get funny about it. Girl at my BIL's school has been suspended for dyeing. (BIL thinks this is daft, btw.)

To be honest I think it won't stop the bullying Pacific. I bet he still gets the ginger nicknames.

I dyed my hair all the time, they would then make their nasty comments as soon as they noticed my natural colour coming through at the roots!! Cant win!

Tiggy, fancy coming and scaring some of the yobs for us?

Edam, DS's school don't allow dyed hair so that is something else to worry about. I am hoping it will be a subtle change and not noticed too much.

Undertone-LOL I'm surprised anyone notices your ginger hair with those pointy silver norks!!

This really annoys me, schools and society (mostly) come down very hard on anyone making racist or homophobic or anti disabled comments. It seems ‘acceptable’ to call people with red hair names. Up until recently there wasn’t even a red haired emoji, yet most other hair, skin and sexuallies have had emoji representations for years.

Making fun of anyone’s appearance is not on, but it infuriates me that ‘gingerism’ doesn’t carry the same severity as being racist or homophobic. It’s just as hurtful as being mean to someone because they have a different colour skin.