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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to leave DS in car at petrol station

113 replies

Elvisina · 29/05/2010 22:50

I wasn't sure where to put this (couldn't find an appropriate place in the 'Being a parent' section). I just wanted to ask whether it's reasonable or not to leave a baby in the car when you buy petrol. My DH and friends say "Yes, of course" and so I do leave my DS in the car usually but today I was at a large Supermarket garage, in a long queue and felt really quite stressed as it seemed as though I was really far away from my car. My DM says "Well, what could happen to him?" and I do see what she means but it just feels a bit odd (he's 5 months). There are a few other situations where I'm also not sure such as leaving him in his bouncy chair in the garden or leaving him in the car while I go back in to get something from upstairs. I'm guessing I'm being ridiculously paranoid but just wanted to know what other people consider to be reasonable.

OP posts:

HanBanan · 31/05/2010 00:32

Trust your instincts. If you feel something's not quite right don't do it.

seeker · 31/05/2010 07:46

No - trust your brain and your reason. Instinct would tell you to keep your child tied to you with bonds of steel for 5 years, then only to let it go if it was wearing a padded fireproof suit and the surroundings were covered in cotton wool!

Our instinct tells us that leaving a child alone in a car seat in a locked car for 5 minutes is more dangerous than them negotiating a slippery, dirty petrol station with lots of other people, moving cars and petrol fumes. If we use our brains and our reason, then it's obviously the other way round.

MmeLindt · 31/05/2010 08:16

I am with Seeker (as usual on these kind of threads)

The car inferno with DC inside on petrol station forecourt is always rolled out on these threads, and I have never ever heard of this. I did a bit of googling and came up with this which seems to suggest that it is not very common and is to do with static electricity.

Leaving my DC in the car was always preferable to me than waking them, dragging them out of the car, across a busy forecourt.

You know that the risk of something happening on the way to the petrol station is much much higher than the car exploding.

EricNorthmansmistress · 31/05/2010 08:21

I do it if DS is asleep or I know he's happy enough. I lock the doors and only at garages where the queue is short. I always take him into the M&S garage as there are always loads of people buying their breakfast. I left him in the car while I popped into aldi once. He was fine but I felt a bit bad. Was only to buy bread and milk. He's a bit older though.

NoahAndTheWhale · 31/05/2010 08:29

I do this and have done since both DC were small. And will keep doing it (although once did have the problem of the alarm going off and everyone in the petrol station wondering which car it was. Including me.)

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 08:40

Also agree with Seeker on this .

My two are now 9 & 7 . Both safe and well .

Always left them in car when filled up in petrol station and heaven forbid left them in car on driveway asleep - why disturb them when I had bags of shopping to unpack and I could sit in peace and quiet and have a cup of tea in front room ( whilst watching car ).

It is not a crimial offenec and you are not going to get your children taken off you if you do this ( unless there is a serious history of neglect and something happens whilst doing this that cause child harm)

Please lets use common sense here .

posieparker · 31/05/2010 08:44

I have four dcs, since the first was out of a carrying carseat ( I was pg when he was six month) I have always left them in the car when I pay at a petrol station.

SimonCowellIsSatan · 31/05/2010 08:46

Oh the child locked in the burning car story. A bit like the man in the back seat with an axe or even the really, awful story about the woman who ate apple seeds and had an actual full grown tree come out her arse?

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 08:53

This shows that a child can be killed whilst out of a car at a petrol station http://kidsandcars.org/bottom_incidents.html here

Did happen in the USA .

I think the risk of a child being hurt whilst out of car at petrol station far outweights aything else happening.

Alouiseg · 31/05/2010 08:54

My bloody cars can't be locked with anyone inside because the alarm goes off. I've never been able to leave a sleeping child in a car seat on the drive because of it.

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 08:57

Couldn't you just use the key in door to lock the car. Mine is the same but if I don't use remote and just key the sensors aren't armed.

trixie123 · 31/05/2010 09:04

surely if the car spontaneously combusted, you being in it as well wouldn't help and therefore probably not a compelling argument. I always leave DS (10m) in the car so long as I can see it. Pay at pumps are rare near me. Also leave DS playing inside while I hang out washing etc (though that will change if he ever gets off his bum and starts crawling) and yes, he is in the car while I bring in shopping etc.

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 09:07

If the car spontanously combusts at the petrol station then you all would die anyway whether in the car , out or in the shop . It will just all go WOOF !

topsi · 31/05/2010 09:10

i try and use pay at pump petrol stations or remember to fill up when i am out without DS

SoupDragon · 31/05/2010 09:12

Aliens. Never underestimate the risk of alien abduction.

ProfYaffle · 31/05/2010 09:13

I would imagine there's a greater statistical risk of your children coming to harm on the drive to the petrol station.

Shouldn't we all leave our children at home just to be on the safe side? Oh, hang on, don't most accidents happen in the home? I mean have you seen how many people are injured by tea cosies every year?

SoupDragon · 31/05/2010 09:14

I read in the paper in the last few days of a boy being run over by his own father at their home.

seeker · 31/05/2010 09:15

OK, so the car spontaneously combusting story has been satisfactorily debunked.

Now for the next bei of my obsessive quest.

"my FIL works with minority groups in a deprived area and says he knows families who got their kids taken off them for leaving them asleep in the car outside their house."

Taken off them by whom and why?

(I'm going to keep c and ping my post til someone answers)

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 09:17

Next time you go to a petrol station and come back feeling s bit strange ( no it's not the latte from the BP garage)

Do this alien abduction survey

MmeLindt · 31/05/2010 09:18

Seeker
I would be very surprised if there were not a whole lot more to that story than the DC being left in the car.

maltesers · 31/05/2010 09:19

I would leave baby in car if i had to pay at Kiosk. . . lock car though and be able to see baby if possible. How long does it take to get baby out of car etc ? Takes forever. !

seeker · 31/05/2010 09:36

Mme Lindt - didn't you know thet there arre armies of social workers patrolling the streets with the sole purpose of removing children from completely innocent well intentioned parents? They've got nothing better to do, you know!

MintHumbug · 31/05/2010 09:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MintHumbug · 31/05/2010 09:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MmeLindt · 31/05/2010 10:00

MintHumbug
Sorry, but if someone left their child/ren in the car and left the engine running, then that does make a huge difference. That is something that I would never do. More because I could not be sure if my DS would not take it upon himself to try driving a car.

And I repeat. If you have to scour the internet to find incidents of children being harmed in car fires, and you cannot find one in UK then it seems to me that they are very uncommon.

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