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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to leave DS in car at petrol station

113 replies

Elvisina · 29/05/2010 22:50

I wasn't sure where to put this (couldn't find an appropriate place in the 'Being a parent' section). I just wanted to ask whether it's reasonable or not to leave a baby in the car when you buy petrol. My DH and friends say "Yes, of course" and so I do leave my DS in the car usually but today I was at a large Supermarket garage, in a long queue and felt really quite stressed as it seemed as though I was really far away from my car. My DM says "Well, what could happen to him?" and I do see what she means but it just feels a bit odd (he's 5 months). There are a few other situations where I'm also not sure such as leaving him in his bouncy chair in the garden or leaving him in the car while I go back in to get something from upstairs. I'm guessing I'm being ridiculously paranoid but just wanted to know what other people consider to be reasonable.

OP posts:
MmeLindt · 31/05/2010 10:00

Where is it illegal in Europe to leave your DC in the car?

nancydrewrocks · 31/05/2010 10:03

minthumbug you are wrong. It is not illegal to leave a child unattended in a car per se. It is a criminal offence to neglect or endager a child but whether that has occurred is much more complex than a child be left unattended.

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 10:07

If you leave your car unattended with engine running - whether child in car or not then there is an offence but nothing to do with with neglect - Quitting - contary to Road Traffic Act

Onajourney · 31/05/2010 10:08

Two Summers ago a after dropping off my children at school, I got back to my car and a Policeman was really telling off a Mum in the car behind me who had left her toddler in the car whilst she dropped the others off at school. I don't know what the law is but he was really having a go!

seeker · 31/05/2010 10:09

Well OF COURSE you wouldn't leave the engine running. That would be stupid.

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 10:17

There is no law that says that a it is illegal to leave a child in a car - it would be an offence of neglect etc if any harm should come to child . The same as a child being left alone in a house for a short period of time . Abandoment of a child would be where there is no intention of retur ing to check on welfare etc of child .

The policeman mya have had words wth this mother but probaly drawing her attention to possible dangers which he is perfectly correct to do .

So I think we need to get over the fact that leaving a child in car whilst paying for petrol or leaving child in car on driveway asleep is not neglect or abandoment.

MollieO · 31/05/2010 10:22

I don't recall if the engine was left running in the case I was told about. Very stupid indeed if so. However imo equally stupid to leave dcs in the car with the keys in the ignition (have seen that on several occasions).

MintHumbug · 31/05/2010 11:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BexieID · 31/05/2010 12:59

The car catching fire thing is when you leave the nozzle in and get back in your car, and the static ignites the fumes when you take the nozzle out. AFAIK all pumps in UK you wouldn't be able to do that anyway as you need to keep the lever on nozzle pressed. And isn't it a bit lazy anyway just leaving the nozzle in and sitting in the car?

When I get petrol with DP, he puts it in and I go and pay, so there would be static from me doing that but would be ok, as i'm not the one touching the nozzle.

CheekyPinkSox · 31/05/2010 13:04

With regards to the leaving child/ren in car with engine running is illegal yet the OP says about leaving child in car at Petrol station, so what do people do? Get out, fill up, get in get purse out, put keys in ignition start it up then go pay

I always leave my kids in the car whilst paying for petrol, why not? they are a spit away from me, im inside shop in VIEW of my car and can see the car very well.

Sassybeast · 31/05/2010 13:17

I would at a petrol station when I had a clear view of the car all the time. Anything else - no. Not because of alien explosions but because someone reverersed into my car whist I was sitting in it, wrote the car off and nearly gave a me a heart attack, so i wouldn't run the risks of the kids being in that situation with me being out of sight.

maryz · 31/05/2010 13:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WillowM2B · 31/05/2010 13:38

You would be more likely to be knifed or shot by irate drivers in the queue on returning to car and going through the whole rigmarole of strapping DC's back into the car in my area.

Patience is unheard of here. They are up your backside beeping before you get your foot in the door. And if you stall on pulling away...

Slippingthroughmyfingers · 31/05/2010 13:57

.
Haven't got the time can't be arsed to read the whole thread.

Have we had:

Carjacking

Explosions

Kidnapping

Yet

??

Have to say if anyone took my car with DS in it, they would bring back PDQ as he would have talked them into submission.

oldandgreynow · 31/05/2010 14:00

'A warning though, my FIL works with minority groups in a deprived area and says he knows families who got their kids taken off them for leaving them asleep in the car outside their house'

Really a couple near us do this all the time.He is a policeman and she works in child protection.

mosschops30 · 31/05/2010 14:06

OMG you are all mad!!!!!!!

Ive never heard anything so bonkers in my life as dragging all your kids out the car to pay for petrol ..... unless your paying for it in some parallel world where you cant actually see your car

MN is fecking bonkers today ..mmr vaccines, tatoos and now this

DaisymooSteiner · 31/05/2010 14:06

Slippingthroughmyfingers, in addition to those we have also had alien abduction.

I am going to add another in to the mix - what if a crazed gunman holds up the petrol station? Would you rather your child was there at gunpoint or sitting in the potentially-explodable car. Hmmmm????

undercovamutha · 31/05/2010 14:15

I leave my DCs in the car as long as I can see them. In fact, when DCs were tiny babies it seemed like I did most of my shopping in the Texaco shop!

I also leave them in the car outside our local bakery if I can get a parking space right outside the door.

EmmyVonN · 31/05/2010 17:54

I wouldn't shout pfb so easily. I have done it but only if I'm near the entrance and can see the children inside the car.

This happened to an aquaintance of a good friend. The car was a Honda jazz. Apparently there was something wrong with the electric windows.

www.mg.co.za/article/2009-09-04-justin-nurses-daughter-dies-in-fire

They were only unloading the groceries

CaptainUnderpants · 31/05/2010 18:35

This thread seems to be going round in circles !

To the OP - YANBU in leaving your child in the car when you go to the petrol station.

I now go one step further and leave my two at home when I go to the petrol station , yes they are 9 & 7 yrs !

cryhavoc · 31/05/2010 19:02

Zombies. Don't forget the zombies...

YANBU OP. As long as you can see the car and are happy with doing it, carry on. I used to - can't anymore as DD likes to experiment with wriggling out of straps when not being entertained, and I don't want to return to the car to find her throttling herself in the back.
I keep her reins in my bag for this sort of occasion.

bebesequin · 31/05/2010 19:05

Choking risk? Regurgitated milk or foodstuffs can happen any time a babe is left-but each to their own

MintHumbug · 31/05/2010 19:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MintHumbug · 31/05/2010 19:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

orienteerer · 31/05/2010 19:52

YANBU