or is this gender stereotyping gone mad?

[NarabugHitWindscreen]

I was in ELC yesterday and browsing the wonderful Happyland stuff. A mum with a little boy (2 at a guess) was browsing around, and looking at the storage boxes that go with Happyland stuff. She asks the shop assistant whether there is a 'boys' one.

Basically there is a pink fairy girly one, a space one (that she didn't want) and a generic one that looks like this this

Shop assistant shows generic one, and the mum says "Thats not for boys, it has flowers on"

I'm a bit clueless (as I'm a mum to a DD) and I know its none of my business, but I'm just curious - are mums with boys perturbed by unisex toys with flowers on etc?

Another e.g. apparently when my ex was a little boy he wanted a plastic tea set, but his dad refused to let anyone buy him one. If DD wanted a boyish toy I'd get it for her.

Just spit-balling for opinions, please don't roast me!

Dads are like it because that's what they were subjected to. If you talk to them about it they see it's silly if they've got any sense.

I think ELC is particularly bad for this - why the fuck are there pink garages? Women DRIVE, don't we???

Jamie - yes, it is mostly the dads who push the football. Thankfully, dh can't bear it and loves the fact that ds is into dancing! (plus, he gets to sit in a warm waiting room on a sat morning, rather than on a cold muddy field!).

Oh, and bloody Hamleys!!! Last time we were in London I promised to take ds there. He really wanted and etch a sketch. Scoured the store, only to find it on the 'girls' floor. How the hell is an etch a sketch a girls only toy?

I cannot abide this girls/boys toy nonsense and I'm going to complain to retailers now- I wonder if it could it be joined to the 'let girls be girls' campaign? after all it's all part of the same sexist message.

The comment about how pink used to be for boys because it is like red is interesting. I heard something like in China it was blue for boys because blue is the colour of the sky and closer to heaven and God, and more value was placed on boys. Don't know if that is true!

You might be interested to know that at our local boys state secondary school (where my 13 year old nephew goes) there is currently a big trend for baby pink.

Apparently all the boys want pink t-shirts, pink laces in their football boots, pink accessories on their bikes...

Maybe there's hope for the next generation.

Thing is, lots of boys/men look nice in pink (DH has several pink shirts). Conversly, lots of little girls look terrible in it (red-heads particularly) but want to wear it anyway

I especially don't understand the pram thing. DH has pushed the pram all day today. Is it girly to push prams?

pink's been fashionable for men for a while now, hasn't it? I see loads men wearing pink shirts and T-shirts around.

Hi FranSanDisco I was v interested in your comments on boys dressed in tutu and gender stereotyping research. I am working for BBC on a story about a row in the US over a 5 year old boy in a female Halloween costume. Would love to talk, to you, or other mums with similar experiences. I'm on [email protected]. Best wishes.

this makes me so . When I see parents do this kind of thing, I can't help but think "you're teaching your child misogyny, that anything girly is not good enough and should be shunned and scorned unless girlyness turns out to be catching."
Then I think of my DD who's going to have to share the world with boys who have essentially been taught to hate her and treat her with contempt.

Yep, never buy a boy anything pink or flowery, it might turn him gay... that was a JOKE btw. I buy my DD and DS things they are into whether it be 'girls' or 'boys' things, my DS loves anything pink (he's 2). You wouldn't believe the hassle I had trying to find a 'unisex' bike a few months back, just a plain red bike, everywhere I looked they had either a girls section or boys section, all really pink & sparkly for girls and blue and angry faces/skulls for boys. I think it's a ploy to make people spend more money, it means a lot of people will buy twice.

It's utter bollocks but soooo common. Personally as the mother of 2 boys I have tried to keep this sort of nonsense away from my children but the pressure is immense. FIL and I almost fell out when I bought Ds1 doll in a buggy one year for Christmas (I think his comment was something along the lines of, "what in god's name did you get him that for?" We aren't close It's just fear I guess but totally misplaced and I tend to ignore it.

Hi Halfdutch, would love to help so will email you.

Pink Stinks is a campaign against gender stereotyping, and runs small targetted campaigns against it - the first was against ELC, and I'm hoping they'll take that up again as things clearly haven't improved in there. Also Sainsbury's, with it's dressing up costumes - boys got doctors and girls got nurses, but they have said they'll change those.

(The website talks about girls, but they're also concerned about the limiting effect on boys as well)

Sounds like maybe Hamleys might be one to look at next!

www.pinkstinks.co.uk/

If you're truly not bothered about colour schemes, this bargain price partly pink tractor from ToysRus would make a great gift for many a child.

Unfortunately, DS2yo has 2 older brothers who would never let him live it down, sigh.

I was in a toyshop with my ds, another mum was there with her ds.

He wanted a tea set, his mum said, 'you don't want a tea set, it's for girls, you want a gun!'

DS is cars, Thomas and Chuggington mad - however his dad and grandad are both saddo train spotters

But he'll happily play with his kitchen, I also have a wooden fruit set that he can chop up.
DH took DS to Manchester airport and allowed him to buy a model plane from the gift shop, he chose one that was covered in pink and purple flowers

I do despair of all the unnecessary gender typing of toys. My nieces all love playing with the Thomas toys are PILs house! And my nephew adores Peppa Pig!!

You think thats bad OP you need to spend more time hanging round the games section in HMV and GAME and that and see all the dads buying "manly" games for DS, I've seen boys no older then 6 pick up perfectly good stuff like Lego Batman and then have dad take it off and show em a manly game like Battlefield and COD etc, it's laughable.

DS is 8 yo and told me he was a being called anerd because I wouldn't let him play COD . The thing is he loves cars and racing games not war games but to be a 'boy' he has to play COD and play football - peer pressure. He's a gorgeous nerd .

i had a 'discussion' with someone over whether butterflies should be allowed for boys, in this case on teh wooden letter 'B' it was either a blue one with a bear or a red one with a butterfly, i wanted red, i already has a blue 'T' she said i couldn't because butterflies 'are for girls' as a result DS has lots and lots of butterflies in his room

DS is 8 and a friend recently knitted him a cool beany made of multi-flecked wool. he loved it and wore it to school, but won't wear it any more because he said everyone laughed at him because it had pink bits in it!
Stupid bloody kids!

My 16 month old son has a pink trike. They had run out of the brightly-coloured one in ELC so I got the pink one. The assistant said "oh, won't his dad mind?"

Just before halloween Tescos were selling face paint.... for boys. Orange, black and camo colours. (Tigers, skeltons and soldiers) Wanted to get face paint but was bu663rd if I was boing to buy gendered face paint!

The so-called "study" that showed a girly preference for pink because berries are red, has been thoroughly trashed here www.badscience.net/2007/08/pink-pink-pink-pink-pink-moan/. The only thing missing from that excellent article is the fact that the gatherers in hunter gatherer societies did not just gather effing strawberries! Blueberries, blackberries, gooseberries anyone? Not to mention carrots, tatties etc. Oh, and the blood of a freshly hunted animal is a lovely bright red - so boys "ought" to like red.

Oh this really annoys me.

I was in the toy section of Asda the other day and in front of me was little of about 3 and his Grandma looking at the toys. The Grandma said the little boy could pick a toy as a treat, and he immediately picked a little plastic toaster. And his Grandma said no as it was for "little girls" and he was a "Big boy"
:(

I also have a friend who's little boy can't push a little buggy around, because his dad won't allow it :( This dad also boasts continuously about how his little boy is always 'flirting' with all the beautiful young women at nursery / doctors surgery. He's 1 :(