Was I out of order?

[Wanderingsheep]

MIL and SIL have just been round. SIL is around 20 wks pregnant and we got onto talking about the birth, what hospital she will have the baby at etc.

DP jokingly said that she might want to go to the hospital that has the most choice of drugs. She said that she doesn't want an epidural as it's not a natural birth if she has one.

This comment really bugged me as I had an epidural myself and felt like she was judging my own choices so I said, "well thanks that makes me feel great about my own birth!" This upset her and she said, "it's my kid and i'll have it the way I want it!" I told her that I wasn't disputing that and that everyone has the right to their own choices but I just felt that she shouldn't have said the comment in front of me.

SIL and MIL have stormed out and DP says that I was out of order for saying what I said and I should just have bitten my tongue.

I feel awful but I just felt so angry with her for saying what she said. Was I being a bit over-sensitive?

I apologise if this has offended anyone who has had a difficult birth or had to have a cs. I was born by cs myself. Babies need to be born however they need to.

I think I just have a bit of anger pent up from when she said to me, "oh I want a girl" and then jokingly said, "if I have a boy I'm gonna swap it."

TBH - YABU. She has PFB syndrome and also pregnancy hormones to contend with. She could be being totally unreasonable, and wont see it. You should know that.

You have to let comments like that glide over your head. Each to their own. She may get the natural birth she wants - in which case fair play. She may end up having lots of intervention resulting in EM CS. No one knows.

I get comments all the time from people about the 'too posh to push' brigade and how csections are unnatural. Both DS's were born via CS, and yes with DS2, I could have had a VBAC - but didnt want to. So I am kind've in that camp. Doesnt bother me one iota. My body, my babies, my choices.

Btw - the comparisons dont stop here...they carry on once the DC's are born, so my advice? Grow a few skins.

She has accepted my apology saying that she wasn't judging and would never judge anyone by their choices. I feel really glad about that but .

good for you apologising. I think she probably over reacted too really but it is always good to bow down a little to keep the family peace.