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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

not to want Bride to use GHDs on DD?!

77 replies

BottleOfRum · 23/04/2010 15:18

DD is 3, and she will be a flower girl at a wedding next month. Bride is a (not particularly close) old school friend, who has shown many Bridezilla tendancies so far (female guests are requested to wear pastel colours etc). I believe the only reason my DD has been asked (as neither me nor DD are close to Bride) is because DD is a pretty waif-looking doll-like child, and will be good for wedding photos!!

Bride has just sent round an email to parents of bridesmaids, asking them to ensure their children are at hers by 8:30am on morning of wedding (not ideal, but fine), for "makeup and hair", and said that all girls would be having their hair curled with ghds and put up with flowers.

I don't want my DD's hair to be curled with GHDs, surely it isnt good for her hair at that age? None of the other mothers seem to have a problem with it, since they have replied to all saying "no problem" etc.

HOWEVER..... (don't yell at me) i once let my sister curl DD's hair before using GHD's, and put pictures on fb (sigh), although regretted it a lot the next day (stupid wine made me make stupid decisions). So do I really have a leg to stand on, since I've allowed it to be done before?

OP posts:

WingedVictory · 23/04/2010 21:39

"Just make sure that the car they leave in has "NISSAN MICRA" Written across the back of it for all the photos at they pull away."

Very good, KickArseQueen! BottleOfRum, you haven't shot yourself in the foot over the previous hair straightening incident, you've Learned Your Lesson (if you want it to go that way, that is.)

Everyone who has decribed Bridezillas on this thread could direct them to the Let Girls Be Girls campaign, which I'm sure includes not performing excessive cosmetic acts on wee girls!

pigletmania · 23/04/2010 21:40

catinboots and rust falling off it. How old is this NIssan Micra 25 year old Make up on a 3 year old, put your foot down op dont just take it.

AitchTwoZone · 23/04/2010 21:40

i would REALLY not like this. it's just creepy and weird to want to piss about with a child's natural beauty, imo.

pigletmania · 23/04/2010 21:44

I would never allow that noway, would rather say to her to stuff it then! Its not like she is a good friend either.

Bumperliouzzzzzz · 23/04/2010 21:44

No, I would let my nearly 3 have straighteners put through her hair (if she is like me though she will never need them ) and certainly not for curling, it really pulls the hair. And defo no to make up either.

Bride sounds like a loon.

Paulinespens · 23/04/2010 21:48

Does a 3 yr old really need any artificial enhancement?
I'd be quite reluctant to put a my own DD aged 3 through it.
And yeah, bride sounds mental.

SuSylvester · 23/04/2010 21:49

oh let her have her hair curled fgs

paisleyleaf · 23/04/2010 21:49

Yuk to make-up on a 3 year old.
Maybe you could tell her no to the straighteners because it was done once before but singed her hair as it's too young.

twinklingfairy · 23/04/2010 21:53

My DD is flowergirl at sis wedding. She will turn 4 the day after. Sis has hinted that she would want her hair curled using GHDs.
I am undecided too but the majority here are saying go for it??
I have tried DD with rags, but didn't get the method right. DD was fine with them, though I was disappointed with the lack of curl.
When I suggested rags to sis she screwed her face up but then she does that for pretty much every suggestion I make.
I thought sis was bridezilla ish. No Nissan Micra at the hen do!! And pastel shades for all the guests, that is insane!!!

detoxdiva · 23/04/2010 21:56

Oh fgs, lighten up - she's a little girl being a bridesmaid ...let her have her hair curled if she wants. Once is hardly going to cause all her hair to fall out is it

Dd (4yo) was a bridesmaid 3 weeks ago and loved being a princess for the day in her pretty dress and shoes, complete with curly hair....she looked adorable and her poker straight hair has been just fine ever since. The offer of curls for a day hardly make my sister a bridezilla.

Paulinespens · 23/04/2010 22:00

Why can't a little 3 yr old enjoy being a "princess" for the day without fake curls and make-up?

AitchTwoZone · 23/04/2010 22:14

i think for me it's getting into pageant territory when they start flattening and curling little kids' hair. bbbrrrrrrr.

twinklingfairy · 23/04/2010 22:14

My mum used to put in rags for me and later, when she learned about it, kiss curls.
It was a right old pain to have all that in my head, but I knew that in the morning I would have fantastic bouncy curls.
I used to love it!
I can't remember if I had them in as young as 4 but I defo had them in Loads from 6or7 onwards (dancing competitions, which I also loved!).
DD has had them in twice already, without the fabo results, am sure my mum would make a better go of it.
There is no need really to have to use heat.
As for make up!!
]
That's all I have to say on that.
Thank goodness my sis is not out of her mind, to try for that one! IMO

AitchTwoZone · 23/04/2010 22:17

to be quite clear, this is all academic for me as dd1 has The Most Beautiful Curls a la shirley temple.

scottishmummy · 23/04/2010 22:23

what a disproportionate fuss.curled hair.not plucked eyebrows.and no it wont ruin her hair just the once

im not feeling the love from you about this wedding.dont think this is really about wee girls curled hair...

missmoopy · 23/04/2010 22:24

Its one day, its no big deal. YABU.

AitchTwoZone · 23/04/2010 22:26

another reason why i wouldn't like it is that it would mean you'd have lots of photos of dd in pretty dress being a bridesmaid etc how exciting, but she wouldn't look like dd because someone would have done weird stuff to her hair.

SmellsLikeTeenSweat · 23/04/2010 22:29

Pleeeeeze tell us more about this bride. I love the idea of No Nissan Micras. She must have more front than Blackpool. What's her house like? What will her marriage be like ? Does her DH-to-be know that he is going ot be micro-managed for the rest of his life? ('Darling, you can't drink beer. It's too common. Have wine. And do you realise that your soup bowl doesn't match your dinner plate? [shock}' Etc. Etc.

Oh and please let your DD have her hair straightened, just so you can come back on here & tell us all about teh wedding... Dunno about the make-up though, you might not like the photos. I would surreptitiously wipe it off

megapixels · 23/04/2010 22:45

YANBU. I wouldn't ask a three year old for her opinion on this either . Just say no if you don't like it.

etchasketch · 23/04/2010 22:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SpringyThingy · 23/04/2010 22:52

YOu know what you should do, but I will say this; how's this Bride Monster going to feel with everyone cooing over your little doll? Sit back and enjoy - ooh yes she is mine - ohh thank you yes, we think she's gorgeous too - ooh yes she IS having a lovely day, loves being the princess (glug, glug)

KickArseQueen · 23/04/2010 23:02

winged

Alambil · 23/04/2010 23:03

Just keep DD away from them

My sister had her hair curled for a wedding when she was about 4... she then proceeded to pick up the heated curling tongs

Absolutely horrific start to a wedding day! She spent the whole day with it wrapped (she only held it for miliseconds; one of the other bridesmaids was a nurse so dealt with it....)

Oooooh the stress!

KickArseQueen · 23/04/2010 23:08

omg! lewisfan, was she ok?

Paulinespens · 23/04/2010 23:20

I think little girls with curly hair (like my DD1) should have curly hair and little girls with straight hair should wear it straight.
They're 3 FFS!
Using straightening/curling irons and make-up on a 3 yr old is sick.
Anyone remember the "Tiny Pops?" shudder

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