to already be terrified of childcare costs for an unbon child

[strawberrykate]

I live in London and I've been browsing childcare costs. They are terrifying. They are more than I've ever paid in rent or on a mortgage in fact! Local nursery is £920 a month, childminders seem around the same. Plus they rarely start early enough for me to get to work on time. I'm absolutely terrified. How do people afford childcare?

Dp worked nights until dd was 3 then took at year off (dd stayed at montessori though) and then went back to days when she started school.

It is difficult. Have you looked at the Daycare Trust and/or NCMA sites? It is some time since I had pre-schoolers but those costs sound relatively high to me, I have to say.

Re time: yes, again, difficult - you may need to negotiate days on which you leave early/arrive late, because of travelling times.

It is, however, doable. Loads and loads of working parents do it. Honest.

unfortunately there is little incentive for a woman to go back to work after having a child unless you as a couple or alone make more than what the childcare costs along side every other bill etc.

You can get childcare vouchers from employers but there is a maximum amount

and you can also claim ctc for childcare costs with a registered place.

with my last salary we would be paying more money out if i went back to work.

But we decided for me to stay at home as we didn't like any childcare options where we are.

ppl manage though, it is done more often than you think

It is scary.

But aren't there tax credits or suchlike available to help if it stretches income too much?

I'm sure I got something when I went back to work after ds1 was born.

It gets cheaper once they are at school (as long as you use state schools).

Maybe you or your dh could use work based child care vouchers that pay some of your child care costs pre tax being deducted.

You live in London and you get away with paying less than a grand a month in rent or mortgage?! Blimey. At least you're lucky in that respect.

As for childcare.... look at all the options carefully. If you have really early starts or late nights, then a nanny may work out most cost effective.

When my children were at nursery, it technically opened at 8.30 which was useless to me as teacher, as I started work at 8. I came to an agreement that they would open earlier and charge me double time until 8.30 am. Worth looking at that. A childminder is more likely to be flexible, but again, may charge extra for early starts.

Weigh up whether you're better off taking a longer maternity leave, to cut down the years your child will spend in pre-school care.

Children now get a certain number of free hours from age 3 which must be a big help.

Finally, accept that this period of your life may mean working for no net gain, for the sake of staying in your career. Many of us have been there - it is tough, and you have my sympathy, but the long term benefits outweigh the short term poverty!

OK. According to the Daycare Trust - and it should know - those costs are pretty high: the average, in London, for 25 hours a week is around £100 see here

Do bear in mind that if you are not a single parent - sorry, I don't know your circumstances - you will also only be paying half that.

And you won't be going out much. In my experience.

If you atre looking for a childminder you may be able to find one who only wants to work term time. Handy for teachers, who would want to have their dc home with them in the holidays and not pay for childcare they are not using

Nurseries have set hours... childminders are a lot more flexible generally. I for one cater for commuting parents - and have a waiting list... contact FIS for childminder and nursery lists and phone around. Good luck!

Dh and I are teachers, so in other words zero flexibiliy on hours. Costs realistically look like 2/3 of my take home pay.

It's making me wonder about another idea. I want to convert our loft (been saving for a long time to do this and retained a bit from previous house sale). It would make a huge room (14 by 9). I've been for years thinking about childminding. I could use this room for play space. I know the faff of registering, EY curriculum ofsted but after years of teaching it's familiar. I did enjoy the one year I worked in a school nursery. I would like to contribute to my son's education and be with him in the day and the main reason I teach is that I like working with children. It seems like something I'd like to do, at least for 4-5 yrs.

Good idea? It's not just a money driven plan, I've looked into it a number of times. The money part though is a lever for convincing my husband of the idea.

I live in a rather smart area and I hope as a qualified teacher with clean premises I'd be an attractive option for parents commuting into the city. The area is very good for walking children around, near forest land nd shops/ libraries/ parks etc. It seems rather similar o my current job just with a better adult child ratio, less paperwork, more control over my job and flexibility. I really enjoy working with children and I'd like my son to grow up socialising with the other children too.

Would you be interested in a childminder like myself? Do you think others would? Am I mad..?lol

Yep, welcome to the world of being a parent (especially in London).

We paid £900 a month for a nursery for our first child. When we had number two we got a nanny, as it worked out cheaper than paying two lots of nursery fees. Would ahve considered a childminder but couldn't find one who would look after my baby and do school pick ups for my son and have some flexibility.

It's pretty brutal. This is why lots of women (and it is mostly women) don't work until their kids start school.

I went back to work and have basically been working to pay our childcare costs. Many women wouldn't do it (or cannot afford to - my husband pays our mortgage and all our bills etc), but I am doing it as a long term investment.

Once your child is a bit older you can always go down the au pair route if you have a spare room. And as pointed out, once your child is nursery age, the government subsidise it a bit.

I live in a nice "family friendly" part of London as well. For the nurseries around me you pay from £1000 - £1500/month. CM's charge a similar amount. There are certainly no CM's around here that charge less than £5.50/hr and the ones that charge that are usually full. I understand only too well the cost of childcare and that is why I have had to put my family first and stay out of work until my LO starts school. Childcare would eat up my wage and I do not think that it is worth it to have someone else raise my child whilst I work for nothing. Others do make this choice. It is a tough decision you will have to make.

Can I just reiterate that childcare is a shared cost? It's enabling your partner to work just as much as it is you.

violethill-£750 is the most I've ever paid in rent in London. It's a huge difference between a house and a flat and some areas are far far cheaper than others. We were lucky to buy at the bottom of the market too.

BillieJackson - surely childcare costs come out of both your wages. I dont understand the logic that it's just the mother's wage they come out of.

If the childminding idea is borne out of a genuine interest in the job, then it sounds as though it could be a plan.

I have to say, it would be my worst nightmare, but horses for courses!!

I was speaking to a woman at the weekend whose nursery costs were going to be £80 a day/£1600 a month for her 2 children. i was when she told me. That's more than her monthly salary, she said it really won't be worthwhile her working - although currently she is the one working full time and her DH is a SAHD, but looking to go back to work

motherinferior- Every penny is shared in our household and always has been. Living together within 4 weeks of meeting, joint accounts from 3 months of meeting, married with 5 months of meeting. I could never fault my husband on that. It's a team effort with trust and I'm happy if our roles are different at different points in my life, he paid for everything when I did my teacher training working long hours. Maybe years down the line he'll want a career change and I'll happily support him. He earns a little more than me plus at this point has better career options so it makes sense for him to be the one focusing on his career, however he would do whatever I'm happy with.

rainbow in the sky-they do come out of both our wages! Think a misunderstanding somehow arose. Just looking at it from a common sense angle of is it worth me working in my current job full-time, especially when it's a job that's reatively easy to return to after a break.

You need to think about things like pension though. Even working at a loss temporarily may be advantageous in the longer term. Pensions are really boring to think about, but very necessary.

Also, as a teacher, I have seen a number of colleagues who gave up work completely, really struggle to get back into the profession. With the recession, education has become a very attractive career option, and there are a lot of people with recent experience stepping into posts which makes it really hard if you've been out of the workplace for a number of years. I am glad I always hung on in there, because now my children are older I've got to a deputy headship which I really dont think I would have achieved had I taken a long break.

These are all things you need to think about. It's all about weighing up the options.

Kate I reckon your childminding idea is a very good one. I have thought about it too.
If you have the space, I would seriously think about it.
where are you, I will be looking for a childminder soon hopefully!!!

Strawberrykate - I used to be a teacher and became a childminder for a while. Tbh it is a lot of responsibility and a fair bit of paperwork for not very much money. Childminders who are effectively running mini nurseries can do quite well financially but this would seriously reduce the amount of one to one time you would be spending with your own dc. There are a lot of demands on a childminder that are not reflected in the salary. I don't mean to be completely negative - it works very well for lots of people but it wasn't great for me even though I worked with a lovely family.That said, if I was looking for a childminder you sound perfect and I would consider myself very lucky to get you! Good luck in whatever you decide to do

ofsted may not like the loft room idea though.

seriously, ofsted wouldn't like the loft idea?

violethill-I'm not even 100% about returning to teaching. I'm legally qualified and was looking at going back into law when childre were at school. My area is still struggling for teachers too, they've been unable to recruit for my maternity cover and local schools have placed unanswered adverts.

startagain-NE london

saslou- I'm aware of pay, but considering what would be leftover from my salary after childcare it's still attractive! Plus the paperwork now in teaching is pretty unbeatable so shouldn't be a huge shock to the system.

I'm aware of the draw backs, but it does have a LOT of pluses as to the lifestyle I want.